Feeling down - how much have you spent? UPDATED WITH LIST!!

[Josephine_Beth]

It’s hard with money but on the under side, it may sometimes boil down to a fact that isn’t money. Is he really prepared to become a dad, I know it can be hard for some one who is actively social to have to calm that down for a child’s sake. Maybe he is finding it hard to struggle? Are you on a good relationship with his mother? If so, maybe having a cuppa tea and a chat to her may help a bit? If you can’t get through with this, please do tell him;

‘money isn’t everything, I love you and want to start this exciting opportunity to have an amazing family with you but it is stressful for us both, would you consider coming to a councillor with me? Just once to see how it goes?’

Be tactful and caring, maybe make him a lovely dinner, he may turn round and say there is no need, he was over reacting. If he could see how much you care and how far you are willing to fight, maybe it may hit him in a good way?

 

[laetitia85]

Baby Items Itinerary

Pram £395.00
Cozy Toes £29.99
Car seat and base £100.00
Cot £70.00
Mattress £30.00
Bath £7.99
Top and tail bowl £2.99
Moses basket £23.00
Stand £12.50
Crib £28.00
Crib Mattress £10.00
Crib Bedding £24.99
Cot Bedding £17.99
Blankets £24.00
Sheets £11.00
Curtains £10.00
Steriliser £29.99
Baby Bottles £19.98
Bottle warmer £14.50
Towels £14.99
Clothes (up to 6 months) £263.65
Maternity Clothes £182.99
Bibs £16
Cot Mobile £20
Bouncy Chair £10
Vibrating Chair £5
Dummies £6
Changing mat £6.99
Nappy Bin £14.99
Nappies £9.99
Rattles/toys £18.00
Bath Support £7
Travel Cot £29.99
Baby Carrier £29.99
Cat Net £4.99
Toiletries £40.00
Changing Bag £15.00
Breast pads £4.99
Baby Monitor £50.00
Sun Shades £3.99
Pampers £7.00
Gender scan £75.00

Total £1698.47



And he gave me £100 and wanted change!! We had a huge row, and looks like it could be the end for us. But I've had enough now.

Piglet xx

Oh my God you are scaring me! I haven't started buying anything yet but so far, my list comes up to about £850, because I found lots of bargains and decided not to splash out on very expensive-hi-tech-baby-gadgets. I will use quite basic things for my baby, although i do wanna buy nice, useful stuff. I just think they grow so fast! My friend bought things for her baby that she hardly ever uses. The thing is I really can't afford to go over that amount, definately not £1600!!!! You're a lucky woman, I would love to get every single item on your list but right now we just can't afford too much luxury! I think your OH is just trying to be sensible, considering the amount you have spent so far. Sometimes us ladies we wanna go that extra mile, especially when it comes to our precious babies, but try to understand where he's coming from! it's quite a lot of money!! Lucky you, I wish you all the best and please please don't break up over this!!!!

 

[neeko_1]

oh gosh we've spent about £300 so far but there is much more to get...

but lucky we got the pram and cot for £200 other wise that would of been so much more.. we got two cots actually one for the flat and one for mums...

but hun this is where it all starts hun, but i love shopping for LO and she's not even her yet

 

[pigletpoo]

Hey everyone, thanks for your thoughts and ideas.

I didn't think my list was too extravagent tho? I thought I'd just got the basics. I havn'tbought any nursery furniture or anything, and a lot of what I bought was cheep off ebay - I'd much rather have just gone to mothercare and bought the lot!

I doubt he'd go for the counsellor idea.... it might be worth a go tho. Its not just the money, at the end of the day, everything on that list I have bought myself. Its the principle of the thing. And I have major trust issues with him having cheated in the past. I think the baby has made me realise that me and the baby are more important than him and his games.

Its my Birthday Friday, and he is going to Dublin with his mates for the weekend. And he doesn't see why that bothers me. Maybe its my hormones, but I'm sick of him.

Oh and his mother hates me...... she is always sticking the knife in and trying to get him to leave me. She even told my mother that I should have had my baby aborted. So she can rot in hell for all i care.

Piglet xx

 

[weenik]

Sorry you're having such a hard time with OH Piglet, and his mum sounds like a right cow too! You and baby really don't need all the hassle and stress. No way would I be happy if my OH (If I had one!) was going to Dublin when it's my birthday - I suppose unless it's like a stag weekend for a family member or really good mate. I'm having to get all stuff for baby on my own too - thank goodness I got a promotion at work a few months back for the extra cash. My family will help out lots though. I'm not going over the top with what I'm buying though, I'm being sensible xx

 

[leckershell]

Quinny travel system - £230 ebay
Car seat - £99
Cot and Mattress - £119 baby show
Moses Basket + Stand - £10 from friends parents
Bottles - £5, and a large stack from my mom and OH's mom
Towels - £10 and a free one from baby show
Clothes to 9 months - £45 mostly in the adams january sales and free stuff from mom and OH's mom
Maternity clothes - £60 in mostly underwear from primark, and the rest from freecycle
Bibs - £10
Bouncer - £8 from boots in the january sales
Changing Mat - £2 from boots in the january sales
Nappies - £10 as have been bought loads by mom
Toys and Books - £30 and the rest donated from friends or colleagues
Bath seat - £0 freecycle
Wipes and Toiletries - £10 and rest already bought by my mom
Changing Bag - £0 from boots parenting club
Breast Pads - £3
Breast Pump - £14 ebay
Baby monitors - £0 bought by OH's mom
Doppler - £30 argos
Pregnancy books and magazines - £40
3d Scan - £85

total £820.

I thought I'd done things really cheap but even that looks like a lot of money

Oh, and we have to buy a new car - £6499 spread over 5 years, if that counts

michelle

 

[Josephine_Beth]

Oh my, poor lass, it seems like he is pulling away rather than trying to be a good partner, are you sure this is the man you want to raise a child around?

Not trying to sound mean or anything but his actions is speaking louder than words, with what his mother has said also!

Do you have a support network with your family?

Drop me a PM if you need a shoulder lass xx

 

[pigletpoo]

Yeah my family are great. They are all really excited about the baby, and know what an idiot my OH is. They always stick by me, so thats good.

You know, I nearly moved to cyprus once about 3 years ago! It was the first time me and OH fell out big time, we split up for a few months, so I got myself a job lined up in a bar, and was going to move out there with my mate - but she backed out last minute and I was too chicken to go on my own. I wish I had of gone! I love Protaras, thats my most favourite place in the world!

Piglet xx

 

[Josephine_Beth]

Ah, it’s a good country, you should convince your mum and dad to move over and then move with the baby. A great country for children, education wise and living wise, have to say from what I have heard and seen, seems better than the UK for kids. Money wise, it’s not a payable country like the UK with jobs but its good and more public holidays lol

If you ever fancy coming over for a break, drop me a PM! I’m sure my fella wouldn’t mind me dumping the kids on him for a few days

 

[Hells]

I had the same problem with being given loads of knitted stuff. I did appreciate it, but I didn't want my daughter in them all the time. In the end I used to dress her up in the cardigans and take a few photos in different rooms. Then I could always say the stuff was in the wash and show the aunties that she had worn them.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

Ok i have spent a bit but my son had all second hand so i waned some new bits for this baby!

Travel system - £159 that included everything even a nappy bag
Cot - £145 (but its pink and white!)
Travel cot - already have one!
Sterilizer - got it for free as my sis in law bought me one!
Bottles - £15.00 including teats
Clothes - have had loads of top of the range next gear given to me, so in total about 70 quid for new vests, tights and a few dresses!
Jungle bedding, including quilt, soft blanket, sheet and bumper £50 babies rus
Nappy stacker - £14
Assortment of blankets, sheets tc £20
Cot mobile - £20

So in total £493.00 not bad really