Fed Up!

[Rachaellius]

Spose it's my own fault really for not taking charge but ever since me and my OH moved in together he's been in charge of the finances cos I'm crap with money. So he's managed all the bills from his account and mine.
Atm we are majorly skint! Like so skint my network has cut my phone off cos the bill hasn't been paid which worried me enough what with me being 31 weeks pregnant and not being able to contact anyone in an emergency. But to top it off his own has been cut off today so he can't contact me either! There's no way we can afford to pay either until I get paid on friday.

But the reason I'm fucked off is because he can still seem to afford luxuries like smoking! The smoking pisses me off because we both managed to quit when we found out I was pregnant, he seemed to be coping quite well with it but then he got so grumpy and nasty we ended up nearly breaking up because of it and he blamed on the fact that he was struggling with not smoking. So he ended up starting again with conditions that he didnt smoke as much as he did before and that he doesn't smoke in the house or car. Fair enough neither of us have ever smoked in the house but I got in the car yesterday and it stunk!!! And he's smoking like a chimney. Not only can we not afford it but it's really making me struggle too. I've gone so long without one but with the stress just lately and smelling it on him I'm really getting cravings again
And he's said that he wants to go clubbing with his work mates up Birmingham on saturday night, I mean fair enough we've never actually been clubbing without each other before but the timing is awful! Yeah he should be paid by then but we have so many bills to pay off as soon as we both get paid and he wants to go out and get pissed!!! And then have to get a taxi back home afterwards.
Plus I'm just sick of being stuck in the house on my own cos he's had to do evening shifts at work so I never get to see him on an evening as it is, I really can't be arsed to deal with him coming home steaming drunk at 3-4am and us having to suffer the rest of the month for it.
God I wish I could drive too I'm so fed up of being stuck in by myself all the time, defo need to learn after bubba is born.
And then to top it off today when talking about money issues he's turned round and said that I put pressure on him to move in together quickly!!! I mean we were both living at my mom and step dads house in a tiny house for like 6-7 months it was hardly an ideal situation. And now I just feel like he felt forced to move in with me so quickly and get our own place.

Sorry about the rant, and well done if you got to the end of it
x

 

[MissJuly10]

I'd tell him how I feel, sit down with him and a list of everything you pay out and what goes in and really be strict with what can be cut to save money. DH did this with me when we got married, he sorts all the finances as well.

Sometimes men need a harsh reality check to make them do something about it. At the end of the day, there's going to be a baby in the house soon and the money that goes on ciggies will pay for nappies and baby stuff. He's got to think about you and baba now, not his mood swings.

Hope you get it sorted hun.

x x

 

[angelmma]

Totally agree with MissJuly, you need to talk to him. Tbh Id not be happy with him wasting money on smoking when youre phones were cut off, and its also not fair on you cause you quit eventhough it was hard. As I non smoker Ive never understood why people wasted their money on it, but as my dad smokes I know its an addiction that people struggle to quit. But he needs to realise that the money he spends on fags would be best used towards bills. After a previous experience Id never let a man sort out the finances, I was left up shit creek whilst he was getting all the stuff he wanted. You should set out a budget and work out your incoming and outgoings. Then if he has money left over (after his half of the bills are paid and anything for babba is got) then he can do what he wants with his, same for you chick, so atleast then if you have abit of money left over after paying your half you can treat yourself to something nice

Also I know how you feel about him going out on the piss, I love my OH so much and he really is a decent fella, but hes annonced that hes going over to to England to visit some mates in a few weeks time, eventhough he hasnt yet bought anything for baba, I told him I wasnt impressed, and explained that we needed monitors etc, and its gonna be left to me to buy, but its up to him if he wants to go and its his money, but to say I wont be impressed if he goes is an understatment haha. Good luck chick xxx