Fat :(

CustardCream

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:cry: Think thats why I'm feeling so shit :cry: I'm feeling really big today. I feel like I've put on like 20 stone. I've gone up to a size 10 and I know that sounds pathetic but to me thats huge on me. I've suffered with anorexia (not really badly) I'd just binge eat and then not eat. I wasnt grossly thin and maybe cos I was a dancer my weight has always stayed even no matter what I ate. I just feel really down and got the midwife tomorrow so maybe I'll ask her to weigh me cos I never weigh myself (i just go on how i look) but I was weighed at 12 weeks and its in my notes so I'll know how much I've put on :( sorry for the ramble I just feel really down about it. I hoped to stay like the celebs do and I'm mainly all bump just feel like my legs looklike tree trunks :cry:sorry :cry: x
 
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I can really relate to how you are feeling.

I too was a dancer and i too had a problem with eating. I kept getting turned down from all sorts of auditions and competitions and my dance teacher suggested to my mum that she put me on a diet... i think i was about 12 at the time. My mum was disgusted as i was a healthy weight and i got very unhappy at the dance school due to all the pressure of loosing the weight... i just wanted to dance! she withdrew me from the school and i started to use my time up doing other things people my age were doing. By the time i was 14 i had developed a serious eating problem... i wouldn't admit to being anorexic... not to anybody. But i started restricting what i was eating. I went down to 1200 calories, then 1000, then 800, then 600... you can see how this is getting worse! I started restricting myself to only one apple which had to last me both breakfast and lunch and then having the smallest amount of tea possible... sometimes none. I was very confused and unhappy with myself... never really satisfied that i looked how i wanted to. This carried on... on and off until i was 18.

When i met my husband everything changed for me... Somehow he had a way of making me feel just perfect. My confidence grew and for the first time in my life i wasn't counting calories. I don't think having an eating problem ever really goes away and it will always be in the back of my mind that i know just what to do to lose the weight, however now i also know that i do not want my daughter ever experiencing this, i do not want it to control my life the way it did as i want to spend the rest of my years caring for my gorgeous little girl.

i've gained about four stone in my whole pregnancy... my belly is covered in stretch marks and currently looks like a road map! It's really hard to adjust to your changed shape i understand that. I am worried about loosing the weight afterwards but i am not going to let it take away from any of the focus that i will have on my baby and our new family life. I will not let it control my life ever again.

I didn't want to steal your thread just wanted you to know that there are people out there who understand how you feel. It does get better and easier to deal with i promise.

If you ever need to chat you can always pm me :)

wishing you all the best in your pregnancy and loving your new shape!

xxx
 
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I can really relate to how you are feeling.

I too was a dancer and i too had a problem with eating. I kept getting turned down from all sorts of auditions and competitions and my dance teacher suggested to my mum that she put me on a diet... i think i was about 12 at the time. My mum was disgusted as i was a healthy weight and i got very unhappy at the dance school due to all the pressure of loosing the weight... i just wanted to dance! she withdrew me from the school and i started to use my time up doing other things people my age were doing. By the time i was 14 i had developed a serious eating problem... i wouldn't admit to being anorexic... not to anybody. But i started restricting what i was eating. I went down to 1200 calories, then 1000, then 800, then 600... you can see how this is getting worse! I started restricting myself to only one apple which had to last me both breakfast and lunch and then having the smallest amount of tea possible... sometimes none. I was very confused and unhappy with myself... never really satisfied that i looked how i wanted to. This carried on... on and off until i was 18.

When i met my husband everything changed for me... Somehow he had a way of making me feel just perfect. My confidence grew and for the first time in my life i wasn't counting calories. I don't think having an eating problem ever really goes away and it will always be in the back of my mind that i know just what to do to lose the weight, however now i also know that i do not want my daughter ever experiencing this, i do not want it to control my life the way it did as i want to spend the rest of my years caring for my gorgeous little girl.

i've gained about four stone in my whole pregnancy... my belly is covered in stretch marks and currently looks like a road map! It's really hard to adjust to your changed shape i understand that. I am worried about loosing the weight afterwards but i am not going to let it take away from any of the focus that i will have on my baby and our new family life. I will not let it control my life ever again.

I didn't want to steal your thread just wanted you to know that there are people out there who understand how you feel. It does get better and easier to deal with i promise.

If you ever need to chat you can always pm me :)

wishing you all the best in your pregnancy and loving your new shape!

xxx

Awwwwwwww that made me cry. Thank you so much for taking the time to reply and write that. That really has made me think and I will make sure when I feel rubbish I will deffo pm you. I'm glad your now over it and I believe I also was, I wish I could feel good and better about myself. My tells me I'm being stupid and that I look great but that doesnt make me feel better tbh. I'm glad you feel good and wow you don't have long to go now, I bet your so excited :dance:Thank you so much again, really I'm so greatful xxxxx
 
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I'm so sorry i didn't mean to make you cry!

your more than welcome i just thought it might help to hear a story simular to yours.

It's a difficult thing to talk about because alot of people don't understand. They think that because your worried about your weight and appearance that you don't care about your baby and this is 100% not the case. I'm sure you feel blessed to have your baby growing inside you just as i do... It's just that when you've experienced such difficult confidence and body issues anything that alters your shape is always going to stir up a mix of emotions and worries.

When your oh tells you that you look beautiful try to remember the words... it sounds silly but it really does help. Try to remember him saying it and think about it, What it sounded like, What his face was like. Eventually you will see it yourself, even if only for a split second... it's a start.

Thank you :) i'm booked in for a c section on wednesday because the estimated weight of my baby is 10.2lbs... shes certainly is a little chubber :) but i wouldn't have her any other way!

i'm always here if you need a chat

Hugs to you from me

xxx
 
Babe I know how u felt too iw as a ballerina and I was bulimic then I stopped dancing cos of an injury and became fat! I then lost 3 and a half stone before my wedding so I am so aware of my weight! But I just try and tell myself that it is baby not fat cos I haven't changed my diet hardly at all x


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Aww... I just had to respond to this because I know exactly how you are feeling. I have been feeling so, so down, and am really not enjoying my pregnant body. I really want to do the best for my baby and know that the weight and fat that is going on me is all good for the baby, but I hate my body the way it is - and I know that with each passing week things are going to get worse. I feel fat, uncomfortable and so unattractive. My husband tells me I am beautiful - but to me they are just words, and do not match the image I am seeing in the mirror.

I have struggled with eating disorders on and off for over 20 years, but have been relatively comfortable with my body for the past couple of years. Pregnancy, however, is proving to challenge the comfortable place I thought I had found. I am trying to tell myself that this is just a temporary change that my body is going through, and that it is for the most special reason - it is a privilege for my body to be able to carry a baby, and I have longed for a baby for so long. It is often said that people who suffer eating disorders also have 'issues' with control - and I know for me that is very true... and being pregnant I feel so out of control! In normal life I am in control of my weight - if I gain a pound or two I adjust my eating accordingly... but now, I am having to accept that the weight is going to pile on and there is little I can do about it. It is a very difficult thing to accept. But this is a very normal thing, and something that millions of women go through every year... and the vast majority lose the weight they gain once baby is born.

Sending you lots of hugs and positive vibes... :)
 
Pregnancy is only temporary and you are doing an amazing thing by growing another human being inside you!


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Big hugs to everyone!!! I'm not exactly in the same boat, but a similar one anyway. There's not a day that goes by that I don't panic about gaining baby weight and not being able to lose it afterwards - or, worse, saggy skin!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEP!
I don't think I worry about the actual birth as much as I do about what my body will look like.
 
hiya hun,

I know its been a while since you started this thread but i remembered it earlier today and thought i should post.

i've had my baby now, by c section. she was 9.14lbs and is called savannah olivia :) I wanted to let you know that when you see your baby you honestly will realise that it really doesn't matter about your baby weight!

My tummy is still large, i haven't lost much weight at all and it hangs over at the front. Because of my c section no matter how much weight i lose i will probably always have an overhang! When i had my first shower dh had to help me in and out. The bathrooms in the hospital were huge so we pushed babies cot in and left her in the corner whilst he helped me. I stood and looked at my post baby body in the mirror for the first time, I turned and looked at my baby in her cot and it hit me that i actually didn't care about my saggy belly or about my stretch marks... she is worth every single one and a million more.

I just wanted to let you know that its not all downhill bodywise... I was suprised at how proud i felt about my body as i had carried her for all of that time!

Thought this may give you a little boost.

hope your well

xxx
 
hiya hun,

I know its been a while since you started this thread but i remembered it earlier today and thought i should post.

i've had my baby now, by c section. she was 9.14lbs and is called savannah olivia :) I wanted to let you know that when you see your baby you honestly will realise that it really doesn't matter about your baby weight!

My tummy is still large, i haven't lost much weight at all and it hangs over at the front. Because of my c section no matter how much weight i lose i will probably always have an overhang! When i had my first shower dh had to help me in and out. The bathrooms in the hospital were huge so we pushed babies cot in and left her in the corner whilst he helped me. I stood and looked at my post baby body in the mirror for the first time, I turned and looked at my baby in her cot and it hit me that i actually didn't care about my saggy belly or about my stretch marks... she is worth every single one and a million more.

I just wanted to let you know that its not all downhill bodywise... I was suprised at how proud i felt about my body as i had carried her for all of that time!

Thought this may give you a little boost.

hope your well

xxx

Thank you and congratultions on your little girl. Gorgeous name. How are you finding things? Have you done a birth story? I'll go check :D I'm feeling alot better lately and was having a 'fat day' I obvioiusly do feel big but thats life. I cant wait for my son and thanks so much, really thanks. I appriciate your thoughts and care :) thank you :hugs: xxxxxxxx My size 10 jeans still hang off me so I'm being pathetic anyway. Got some Mat jeans today in size 8 :roll: I'm just a drama queen xxx
 
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