endless family tiff :(

[Dragonfly Fi]

We are planning to have a naming ceremony for Jasper in December, he will be six months old. Now i dont get on with Liams family AT ALL, they have been nothing but horrid to me and if i am fair, i havent been all that nice to them either

Anyway, there will be about 40 people there who i love and know and have known for much of my life, Liam would only have had his mum there which i thought was a bit unfair so i suggested to him that he invite his sisters (his nasty, catty evil sisters imho) anyway... so he invites one of them (they have both been ridiculously two faced with me and about our relationship.) Anyway, i thought i should let him know that if HE wanted them to be there then that was cool, we are celebrating the birth of our child and he should be able to celebrate the birth of his son with the handful of people he is related to in this country in attendance - he is from south africa so doesnt have the friend base that i have here... just thought it would be nice for the guy! Plus i think Jasper has made me soft Before i was like 'no i will not be with those awful people' now i want to do it for Liam and do it for Jasper and let it go a bit for their sakes

anyway, his sister Bron is coming, his mum said she would come (and is actually staying over for 5 days inbetween chrimbo and new year... how nice am I!) but when he spoke to his sister Cat she had a huge screaming go at him about how if she was there then the tension would be too much and would cause issues for everyone who came, that she would ruin the day for everyone there because me and her dont get on.

I mean really, arrogant much! I know we dont get on at all but if i have a choice between speaking to the 40 odd people there who love and respect me, or Liams arsehole of a sister, i know who i am going to be chatting to you know

i just cannot believe she can be so arrogant as to assume that it is all about her, its nothing to do with her or my relationship with her, its to do with Jasper and how she feels about him and Liam...

I also thought it would be a nice time for her to meet J, as i intend to breastfeed on demand for at least 3 years so its going to be pretty difficult for her to meet him any other way in the near future.

She has also said that she will 'not be in the same place as me ever' which cuts me out of ANY family event that happens, if Liams grandparents die i cannot support him at their funeral, i cannot go to any family functions or events or anything because she has said that i cannot be anywhere where she is

i really feel this woman is making it impossible for me to be a good wife to my husband and it breaks my heart.

Plus he was really upset and took that out on me last night, so he was in tears and really angry and all i tried to do was give him the option of having his family at the naming ceremony, because i really dont think it was my place to say 'this cannot happen' its his family and they should be there for him.

suppose i just needed to get that out x

 

[karenandbump]

oh hon....what a situation...is it worth you contacting her direct - maybe a letter? to explain that this is hard on hubby and u want it to be easier? x x x

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

she demands that i apologise to her, which is hard for me because for 2 years i was ostrichised from the family because of her actions (when i had done very little to provoke such a reaction) Basically from the very beginning she has said 'bow down to me little girl' and because i have said 'no piss off' i have been ostrachised from Liams family events, situations, funerals, etc

and she has just made sure i am ostrachised from all those in the future too

Liam clams she wants to meet Jasper so long as 'she doesnt have to be in the same room as you' but actually, i dont know if i want someone so horrid to/about me ANYWHERE near my little boy

Part of me just wants to cancel the naming ceremony, it has been nothing but a disappointment for Liam

 

[flexilexi394]

i personally think thats bloody selfish of her!! for god sake its for her grandchild - just dont include her at all! x

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

its Liams sister, not his mum... if it were his mum constantly looking down on us and patronising us i could kind of understand/accept it. But this woman is a mere 7 years older than me and thinks that gives her some god given right to look down on me and my life (without bothering to find out what that life is/is about) its bloody frustrating!

 

[lauren86]

She sounds very self absorbed! Such a shame really isn't it as your husband has little family -you would of thought that she would get over herself and enjoy the day, it's not like she has to even speak to you really! xxx

 

[flexilexi394]

sorry i read it wrong!! how annoying though! x

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

She sounds very self absorbed! Such a shame really isn't it as your husband has little family -you would of thought that she would get over herself and enjoy the day, it's not like she has to even speak to you really! xxx

exactly this... part of me is pissed that she took Liams inviting her to the naming ceremony as some sort of 'method' to get to me, not as a chance for her to meet her Nephew and see her brother, both who are pretty attached to me right now...

I just think its all so petty, am dreading his mother coming here for a while now because no doubt she will bring it up and we will have to 'discuss' things... and by 'discuss' i mean we will have a conversation together about it, all amiable, and then all of a sudden i will hear from liam or his sisters that its all been twisted into some hate fest and that Liams mum HATES me and it was all an act

they are the most false people i have ever, ever met... which of course makes it hard for me to trust/be around them....

In other news Jasper blew his first proper raspberry this morning it was like hes been practising all week so he could get it right for both me and Liam when we were together Love him

 

[lauren86]

yay jasper! Xxx

 

[evie_smith]

Awe yay jasper!!

And your sil sounds like a rite stuck up moo! xxx


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[Dragonfly Fi]

thanks guys... nice to be back it really is have missed you all muchly! xxx

 

[lauren86]

it's good to see you posting again!

 

[Sam's Mum]

How selfish...and childish!! Surely she's mature enough to come along and not cause any trouble for one day!!