Well I thought I would add some of the post pregnancy experiences to this thread to tie it all up.
I saw the community midwife today, Jago is 5 days old and he needed his heel test, weigh in and also oral vitamin K. He is doing well and has lost 4lb this week, which is a normal amount to lose.
I'm doing ok a bit sore from the stitches but recovering ok. I am injecting clexane which I have to do to until Tuesday's it's to prevent blood clots that's because of my age and BMI.
I had a chat with the midwife about my labour and delivery. They have actually written on my notes that I was labouring for 48 mins, now I have had time to think about things I am actually quite angry at how the succession of events happened. The community midwife this morning has suggested I make a complaint.
The pessary was given to me around half 12 and by half two I was having contraction 30 secs apart and thy were painful. I was told at the time this was not labour but actually just the effects of the pessary and that I would need to carry on like this for 24 hours and up to 30 hours if I didn't go into proper labour. I was in agony at this point and there was no pain relief on the labour ward ( I wasn't in the delivery suit at this point).
I went through this so called non labour for 12 hours, the pain was incredible yet I was ignored as even though I begged for pain relief I was given nothing until midnight when they let me have some diamorphine. My husband was sent home to rest. The midwife had already said she felt in 'limbo' at what to do as she felt my contractions weren't real.
Finally at 1:30 they examined me. At this point I was shouting for help and thinking I was going to die, I didn't know it then but I was in the transition stage. The midwife said I was 4 cm, I think she made a mistake. 30 seconds later I was being wheeled down the corridor to the delivery suite and I felt the urge to push. They told me no I didn't and I should stop! You can't stop! I told them the head was out, by the times they pulled the blankets off me he was born, onto the bed by himself. My blood runs cold to think what would have happened had he had th cord wrapped around his neck.
They took me down to the delivery suite to be stitched up, that's when my husband got there, he missed everything.
I believe the midwife who made the decision to send him home and tell me I was not in labour and also measured me at 4 cm made some wrong decisions. I was in labour and having done this twice before I know my own body!
I should have been monitored all the way through because of the diabetes and insulin, there was meant to have been a special baby unit set up in case Jago had any of the effects of my diabetes. It was mentioned in front of me in all the panic I was becoming catatonic ( I looked it up when I got home, good job I never knew at the time!). I know everyone has a horror story to tell, but I feel a catalogue of errors and misjudgements meant that my husband missed everything and I had a labour that wasn't taken seriously and meant I suffered acute pain when I didn't have to.
I know everything is fine now, Jago is happy and I am recovering but I haven't been able to establish breast feeding because I didn't get the quiet time I wanted with Jago after he was born. Because he came out in one push I tore quite badly and so Jago was placed with a midwife while that was sorted. I desperately wanted to Start him feeding slowly as I knew it would be a problem for me to begin with. Now I feel it's too late as he has been bottle fed (I just didn't know what to do for the best at the time) he won't latch and I know I am drying up now. I'm trying to see the best and be thankful he is ok but at the same time I feel a failure at breast feeding and feel robbed of a proper birth.
Well ladies that's my moan over, I know I am not and won't be the only one to have a hard time but it helps to get it off my chest. I don't know whether to complain but the community midwife suggested that because midwives are asked to rotate now into different areas many of the older experienced midwives are leaving or retiring early and that the unit is full of young lesser experienced girls. I do believe they were doing the best they could within their capabilities, but they need to listen to the mothers.
xx
