Daughter asking the questions Ive always feared :(

[rach]

GGG ive just read your story for first time sorry hun need to catch up loads on here
just wanted to send you loads of
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[cloud9]

sounds like you are doing a great job

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

Thanks girls

I took her home lasnight and we had a great weekend just hanging out, I asked if she wanted to talk about anything ans she said no, shes got the answers she needed and just wanted to spend some time with me....awww shes so damn sweet and wise that girl!

She brought a load of old home vids with her from when she was little, so funny (and cringe-worthy - what WAS I wearing ) so ive done copies

 

[rach]

glad you had a lovely weekend hun xxxxxxxx

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

Well theres been a turn around. She decided to ask her Dad about what I told her, and of course he has turned around and said I'm a liar. He even said I asked him to take the girls cos I only had 6 weeks to live....WTF?????

Anyway now she doesnt believe me, as everyone else including my own mother has done, she has chosen to believe his lies.

Ive never hated anyone as much as I hate him, infact ive never hated ANYONE before....and I hate him even more for that. How can he be so cruel? Why cant he just be a man and admit im telling the truth?

 

[Squiglet]

awww hun... what an c***!!!!!...

I think you should tell you daughter a) that he is a liar b)if she doesn't believe you then to get you and your ex in the same room together to discuss this as it is important for her.. not you or your ex... to have the straight truth... Forget the relationship between you and your ex, she is the important one now, and she deserves the truth.

IF... he refuses tell her that it will prove that he is not able to or is unwilling to defend his lies, to confront you face to face... but as you are willing to confront him on this, that proves you are willing to stand by what you said.

I know that if my ex did this.. that he would just crumple if I faced him over the issues in the past. he like your ex, tells a whole host of lies, like I refuse to let him see Tia, he pays me loads of money in maintanence... that I left him loads of debt, that I've turned Tia against him. yada yada yada. .

Its easier for us to lie behind someones back than to say these things to their face.

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

Thanks hun, thats not a bad idea and i'll give it some thought.

 

[nanna66]

Hi, I'm very new here...but I felt I needed to give my support to you too ~ you have been very UNselfish in all of this. You sacrificed your own happiness for the sake of your daughters'. i hope your chat goes exactly how you plan it to...be very honest..your daughter is now old enough to ask the questions, so she is old enough to hear the answers (obviously being very tactful too, leaving out bitterness etc ).

My youngest doesn't live with me, he lives with his dad, because I felt at the time, to maintain any kind of relationship with him (he was being torn emotionally unknowingly to me) it had to happen that way..it doesn't mean we gave up, it doesn't mean we don't love them, it's a mother's love for her children. My son and I get on great, and he stays whenever he wants to, along with his weekend visits..it meant me and their dad kept a good relationship going...so many reasons why some of us mums are put in this situation. I have always been honest with my son, he chose this too...but he always knows the door is open for him

Good luck hun, it's time something worked in your favour xxx