Cesarean or VBAC number 2?

Discussion in 'Labour & Birth' started by MysticKitten, Mar 7, 2022.

  1. MysticKitten

    MysticKitten Well-Known Member

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    Hi all! I’m 35 weeks now and on the fence about what’s best for me and baby girl. I will be talking to the obgyn next week but just wanted some opinions here…

    My first baby in 2014 was an unplanned cesarean. Had an epidural, didn’t get past 9.5 cm in 16 hours, and then they let me decide to have a cesarean because I was exhausted and they weren’t sure I could even push him out. He was 8 lb 3 oz. Being a young mom, first timer, I was absolutely devastated and went through a lot mentally because of this.

    Second baby in 2016 was a VBAC. I progressed fine and was ready to push just 10 hours after my water broke at home. Had an epidural. The hospital screwed up and allowed me to push for 8 hours (yes 8). I was on my back the entire time. Afterwards I was paralyzed from my thighs down, spent 2 weeks in inpatient rehab, catheter for 9 weeks, physical therapy until 12 weeks. But even worse my son was born not breathing and no heartbeat with bleeding on the brain. He had a 2 week NICU stay. Thankfully he’s not had any lasting issues and is healthy. He was also 8 lb 3 oz.

    I have a new obgyn now. From the beginning of my pregnancy she’s said “I would just do a planned csection and not put you through all of that again”. It’s scheduled for April 5, at 39 weeks. Part of me still wants to try to deliver vaginally. I’m terrified of the surgery. I don’t want to die. Knowing my history, and being more educated, I would do things differently than my vbac. If I don’t get an epidural and can labor in different positions, instead of on my back, and my obgyn doesn’t allow me to push more than a few hours… is it worth a try? I know it might not work, and would understand that csection is a possibility. But I still want to try. Is that selfish of me after my last birth experience? (This baby has a different father, so could be smaller than my sons).
     
  2. Jojodan7883

    Jojodan7883 New Member

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    Hi hun iv been in such a similar situation as you,my first baby I was 17 (he’s 21 now) he was emergency section as i didn’t labour properly and was in labour for 3 days,my next baby came 11 years later but coz of last time they gave me 6 hours in active labour and if no progress I’d need a further section,which it came too,my third baby I was adamant I had a natural birth which ended in me having a ventous delivery but to me she came out the right way lol,then came baby number 4,I had him natural and with no pain relief,so finally got my wish but I was 7cm by time I got there so wasn’t allowed no pain relief apart from gas and air which I hate so didn’t use it,and iam currently 14 weeks pregnant and now absolutely dreading labour already as iv done most ways and no way is nice but to not be able to have a baby natural I fully get that you do want to experience it,they can’t refuse you to try hun they may drop the hours they let you be in active labour to 6/4 hours then intervene,iam so glad I got to do it naturally tho I really am so I fully get you it’s a strange one,this time around iv been told I can have a home birth if I wanted but I defo don’t want as having 4 kids and 3 needing assistance I don’t want to risk it,all you can do is try hun but you want a natural birth you stand firm with your consultant and tell them they will agree but with terms,good luck and let me know how you get on or what you decide drl and I’m here for a chat if you want one,I don’t mind sharing anymore info if you want anymore drl xx
     
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  3. MysticKitten

    MysticKitten Well-Known Member

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    Thank you for your kind words. I spoke to a doula yesterday and I’m thinking if I do go natural without pain medication, a doula at delivery could be useful to get me through it. I’m just really afraid of csection surgery and recovery.
     
  4. Jojodan7883

    Jojodan7883 New Member

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    Oh bless ya it is horrible isn’t it and feel like you miss so much as your recovering,I was also terrified of maybe needing another one too but I was fine last time and hoping this time will be the same but as iv done all ways I’m not to bothered now however I would like to go natural again if it’s possible,a doula sounds like a good idea to have,but seriously hun if you want a natural and the pregnancy is going fine there should be no reason as to why they won’t let you try,I burst out crying in my consultants room soon as I walked in and he asked what was wrong and I said iam so scared to have a section again and he said why would you think you would need a section again,just hearing that alone helped me lol,I read copious amounts of story’s online about vbacs and some woman wasn’t allowed some was and I thort iam going to be one where iam not allowed but I was,keep your foot down drl honestly if you want to try for a natural they will allow it they prefare it that way mine told me,I even said I thort after 2 sections that was it that’s all you was allowed to do and he said no we just need to keep a closer eye on your scar etc,but iam living proof they will allow it,although when I was in labour with no pain relief I begged for a section but so glad they didn’t give in haha
     
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  5. WinterWolf

    WinterWolf Well-Known Member

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    They will let you go naturally if it’s what you want. Remember though if you’re pushing for hours again, and the only option is an emergency c-section, it is more risky for both baby and yourself than a planned c-section. If I were in your shoes I’d not take that risk given your history, but it’s entirely up to you and not at all selfish to want to experience a “normal” birth (if there is such a thing!). Good luck, it’s such a hard decision. x
     
  6. MysticKitten

    MysticKitten Well-Known Member

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    Thank you. I’m still waiting to talk to the dr. about the safety of it and what she thinks is reasonable or not. Her opinion is most important. It’s not necessarily that I want to “experience “ a normal birth. But if I can safely avoid major surgery, I’d prefer it. I’m really afraid of dying on the table or hemorrhaging afterwards….
     
  7. WinterWolf

    WinterWolf Well-Known Member

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    Well that’s totally understandable too!! Those risks are also much much lower with a planned c-section vs. an emergency. Labour is so unpredictable, I really don’t envy those have to make this sort of decision. When’s your OB appointment? Hopefully she’ll have some good advice x
     
  8. MysticKitten

    MysticKitten Well-Known Member

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  9. WinterWolf

    WinterWolf Well-Known Member

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    Erg I don’t get on here that often! How’d it go? Are you feeling any better about which way you’ll go?
     
  10. MysticKitten

    MysticKitten Well-Known Member

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    I’m not sure! Lol I’m measuring 2-3 weeks ahead so they scheduled an ultrasound for Monday. If she’s estimated huge I’ll definitely do surgery. If not, they’re supportive of trying a vbac/trial of labor under certain conditions. So I guess I’ll make my final decision at my next appointment, next Thursday
     
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