Beginning to get anxious about hosp stay already!!!

[CH0C0H0LIC]

Going to be a long one so bring a flask and a sandwich!

When I had my son 10y ago, I was suffering from anxiety and depression and had regular panic attacks. My doctor and community psychiatric nurse that I was under informed the labour ward of this and requested that I have a single room with or close to a toilet/shower because of this. I was given a date to be induced and on arrival was given a single room which was all good. I had an awful labour due to the anxiety and I was put on a ward after the birth and struggled to cope. I and my (then)OH kept asking for a single room but it had been given to someone else while I was in the delivery suite. I kept asking my (then) OH to pull curtains round me but midwives kept opening them telling me I was being silly. I was in for two days and couldn't physically leave my bed to shower or go to the toilet and could not eat in front of the other mums. Because of this I discharged myself and was told I couldn't leave without speaking to a social worker - My OH told them where to stick the social worker and we left. Two months later I found out they had had a child protection meeting behind my back because the midwife doubted my ability to look after my baby. Fortunately my comm psyc nurse stuck up for me and explained that my whole stay there would have been completely different had the hospital followed the advice given so I never lost my baby.

Now obviously the pregnancy is moving forward and my anxieties are coming back about going into hospital and due to a new gp and no psyc nurse anymore (so no referral letter) I am worried I'm going to be shoved on a ward again and everything that happened 10y ago will happen again!

I know its too early to ask them what will happen regarding my own room but at what point should I mention it and who to? I don't have a community midwife as I have a lot of appts with hosp due to diabetes etc. My community midwife (if I still saw her) is the one who called me silly and involved the social worker so wouldn't be the best one to speak to anyways!

Sorry about the ramble but it's now all i'm thinking of and I just want to enjoy my pregnancy not fear it.

Sarah xxx

 

[lea m]

I really dont know what advice to give hun but I were you I would try and talk to someone about it asap! And keep talking about it each time so they dont forget! Get things wrote on your notes etc! Explain to your consultant maybe what happened last time and how scared you are again etc !!! Good luck hun!

 

[EllieBelle]

Im not sure what to suggest either, but I think you definitely need to sit down with someone, whether that be a member of staff at your maternity hospital, a different MW, or even your GP and explain the issues, and sooner rather than later.

Thats one of the only reasons I am sad to be leaving France, all maternity wards have private rooms here, they all have 2 beds so your hubby/partner can stay overnight with you, and you are kept in hospital for at least 5 days (longer if you have a c section), until you choose to leave sooner..........in other words they treat expectant mothers very well indeed!!

Lots of luck with trying to sort things out, and am sure it will be fine - have you considered a home birth and then you wouldnt have to worry about any of the problems you have mentioned?

 

[hennaly]

This really is a hard one to give advise for but im hoping in 10yrs the hospital will have changed a little and there will be more privacy for you.
I used to suffer from panick attacks and could rarely manage a whole shop in tesco without dumping my shopping and leaving half way through, its a horrible feeling and no ammount of 'stop being silly' is going to help
Whereas whith my other children i was younger and did as i was told in hospital, this time is a different story, they give me what i want or sod off, i may come across as pushy sometimes and i dont mean to be but if i want a test for something etc i have it and if i dont then i wont, full stop.
The point im making is be strong for yourself and INSIST on what you do and dont want.
Now enjoy being pregnant

 

[lea m]

I used to suffer from panick attacks and could rarely manage a whole shop in tesco without dumping my shopping and leaving half way through, its a horrible feeling and no ammount of 'stop being silly' is going to help

I still do this! Luckily the tablets im taking, although not as good as the ones I should take, are helping with my anxiety!
I dont mind hospitals etc but I do like to have the curtain drawn a lot! Even when Im friendly with the person in the next bed!

 

[maybebaby]

Have you considered a home birth at all? I'm not a fan of hospitals & hated the idea of my OH having to leave me and the baby to go home. I planned a home birth from the beginning last time, and it was a really good experience. I'm definitely hoping for one again this time (especially if it's as close to Christmas as I'm expecting!).

Otherwise next time you're at the hospital ask the midwife you see who is best to speak to about it. If she doesn't take you seriously ask to see another midwife.

I hope everything woks out for you hun

 

[nori]

I would ask all members of your medical team and find out who can sort it all out for you. The last thing you need is to be panicing about the panic attacks etc.. Im sure you have probably had counselling for this in the past and really hope you are still getting the psychological help that you need. Must be hard for you..

Claire x