Annoyed with my friend!
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Hunnie
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Could there be any chance that she herself wants children but is secretly ttc and struggling to do so? It can be very hard for people who struggle to get pregnant or feel that they can't have children to deal with talking about babies etc.
It could be that she's jealous as well? That you're happy and expecting
It could be that she's jealous as well? That you're happy and expecting
This says it's all for me. I often find when people are not progressing in life whether it's personal/professional they can become bitter/jealous towards other peoples happiness and success. She may not want kids but the fact you are happy and other people are giving you attention may cause her to behave this way. Jealousy is what I think she is suffering with. You might want to continue a friendship with her but personally I would not make an effort unless you see her trying.
We're all happy for you hon
xxx
SunnySue
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Could it be that she has changed her mind and now does want children?? If so maybe she is struggling to conceive or her OH doesn't want them? If she feels her life is in a bit of a rut then maybe she is a bit jealous.
if this is the case I think you need to take her actions with a pinch of salt and not hold it against her. I know when I was TTC and after having a mc I found it really hard to be around friends who were expecting/had small children.
Is she normally that rude/selfish? If not I'd be inclined to think there is underlying problem and give her the benefit of the doubt. If she is then I'm afraid she's just not a nice person and isn't worth wasting your time on.
if this is the case I think you need to take her actions with a pinch of salt and not hold it against her. I know when I was TTC and after having a mc I found it really hard to be around friends who were expecting/had small children.
Is she normally that rude/selfish? If not I'd be inclined to think there is underlying problem and give her the benefit of the doubt. If she is then I'm afraid she's just not a nice person and isn't worth wasting your time on.
PerfectStorm
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Sammy - just because she says she isn't maternal and doesn't want children, I bet she will change her mind in the future and will then behave like she's the only one to ever have a child!.
I speak from experience of a friend of mine - not baby related but I can remember when a friend and me were talking about mine and my OH's wedding - in particular the friend I was talking to was an usher at our wedding and had played a pretty special role in that he pushed my Dad in his wheelchair as he escorted me down the aisle - Dad was terminally ill at the time. My friend was saying what an honor it had been to do that and that he'd found it really hard to contain his emotions.) It was that aspect which we were talking about. A female friend turned round and said very loudly and very bitterly "Urgh, wedding talk......BORING!" I was absolutely flabbergasted! I knew why she didn't like anyone talking about weddings - it's because she was jealous. She made out she didn't want to get married but everyone knew that she did and her OH just hadn't asked her.
This is the same girl who had said things like "I don't need a piece of paper to tell me I love him" and "Spending all that money on a wedding.....what a waste...I'd rather spend it on my house or something."
Funny how when her OH did propose on NYE, she was on the internet that same night looking at venues, then organised an expensive full blown wedding at a Gothic Hotel on the side of a Loch in Scotland and spent so much time talking about weddings constantly, and how she wanted something "DIFFERENT!" and would subtly (and sometimes not so subtly!) criticise what I and her other friends had done at their weddings. She really did become Bridezilla! She was a nightmare!
Isn't it funny the way people behave when they are feeling jealous!
We all feel jealous sometimes about different things, but I accept it is my issue and try to make sure that I am happy and enthusiastic for my friend however much it hurts. Why can't all friends do the same.
I speak from experience of a friend of mine - not baby related but I can remember when a friend and me were talking about mine and my OH's wedding - in particular the friend I was talking to was an usher at our wedding and had played a pretty special role in that he pushed my Dad in his wheelchair as he escorted me down the aisle - Dad was terminally ill at the time. My friend was saying what an honor it had been to do that and that he'd found it really hard to contain his emotions.) It was that aspect which we were talking about. A female friend turned round and said very loudly and very bitterly "Urgh, wedding talk......BORING!" I was absolutely flabbergasted! I knew why she didn't like anyone talking about weddings - it's because she was jealous. She made out she didn't want to get married but everyone knew that she did and her OH just hadn't asked her.
This is the same girl who had said things like "I don't need a piece of paper to tell me I love him" and "Spending all that money on a wedding.....what a waste...I'd rather spend it on my house or something."
Funny how when her OH did propose on NYE, she was on the internet that same night looking at venues, then organised an expensive full blown wedding at a Gothic Hotel on the side of a Loch in Scotland and spent so much time talking about weddings constantly, and how she wanted something "DIFFERENT!" and would subtly (and sometimes not so subtly!) criticise what I and her other friends had done at their weddings. She really did become Bridezilla! She was a nightmare!
Isn't it funny the way people behave when they are feeling jealous!
We all feel jealous sometimes about different things, but I accept it is my issue and try to make sure that I am happy and enthusiastic for my friend however much it hurts. Why can't all friends do the same.
MrsHope
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I agree with Froslass! She's jealous! All your mates will be talking about your babies (congrats btw) and all the attention will be on you. I had a similar experience in June when I told two of my friends I was pregnant. One of them already has a baby and she was super excited for me whilst my other friend didn't say much. Turns out she was worried about being 'left out' because me and my other friend might do baby stuff together! (I found out from other friends) sad really! I later had a mmc and couldn't bear to speak to her until last week. Maybe I was being over sensitive I don't know. Just ignore her and you're right- you've found out who your friends are! Good luck with the situation! Xx
PyscoFalcon
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I hate kids and think babies are ugly but I still want my own and went to great lenghts and pains to get this far.
Whilst trying and failing if others talked about babies etc and tried to get me involved I would just walk away as I would be so upset I didn't want anyone to know how much it hurt me and made me jealous of them.
Maybe the same is for her? Still say she hates kids etc but wants her own but can't for been in a rut or something?
Whilst trying and failing if others talked about babies etc and tried to get me involved I would just walk away as I would be so upset I didn't want anyone to know how much it hurt me and made me jealous of them.
Maybe the same is for her? Still say she hates kids etc but wants her own but can't for been in a rut or something?
winnie89
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hun i was pretty much the same to my sil after suffering a miscarridge in 2009 i hated any one who got pregnant and blamed myself for losing the baby( my sil got pregnant 6 months before me but when i actually fell pregnant we were closer than ever and now we are best of friends, just ignore her if she carries on being horrible
