am i over protective?

[hennaly]

Bearing in mind this is baby 7 so i know what im like as a mum!
Well, my brother in law and sort of stepsister (foster sister inlaw) have both had my monster in law look after there children from about a few weeks old, as in the odd over night stay and then from a few months weekends etc, there is no way on this earth i am having baby away from me at this age, none of my others stayed a night away from me untill at least a year old, i know for a fact that whatever rules you have ARE chucked out the window when you back is turned and monster in law thinks she knows best.
I will have the odd evening out once it is a few months old but will having whoever looks after baby come to my house and do it.
The other issue i have is 'pass the baby' this really gets my goat, i dont mind anyone having a cuddle but my inlaws pass the kids round like its a game and they never seem to be put down to sleep but someone constantly has them in their arms. Having said that my 8 month old nephew is a darling, he isnt a crybaby and is always happy so i am not saying they are doing any wrong just not how i feel happy doing things.
Am i just being over protective or even selfish, i dont know
Sorry if i have bored you but this is a real issue for me as i know it isnt going to go down well with monster in law when i dont let her have the baby to saty.

 

[poppy160]

I don't think it's selfish, it all depends on when you feel ready.
My LO stayed at my Mums for the night when she was about 10 weeks. I felt good about it because I trust her and I know she listens to what I say, not does what she feels like because 'She knows best.'
I'm uneasy when it comes to Ella staying the night with the in-laws though, she stayed there last weekend but I felt alot better when she was with my Mum.
Also with the passing around thing, I know what you mean. When we're at the OH's parents somebody has always got Ella, and if they give her back, she's always given to OH..I don't really get a look in, unless she's screaming and needs to be put down for a sleep.

 

[LisaJ1986]

I hate the 'pass the baby' game too! You always seem to get the baby handed back when they're really grumpy. I struggle putting Angel to sleep at night after we've been to a family do. When she's been fed i try and send her to sleep so no-one will take her off me again!
And i completely trust my mum, but i couldn't send her away for the night. I left her in the car yesterday with my sister when she went to pick up her son from school and i stood at the kitchen window waiting for them to get home! She was only gone about 20 mins! I have a doctors appointment next week so my sister is having her then and i know it'll send me screwy!
My worst fear is i'm gonna be strict on sweets and chocolate! And i know the in-laws will not obey my rules! I want it doing my way and if they don't tell me i won't know. So it's gonna drive me mad!

 

[Suzie and Faith]

Don't get me started on pass-the-baby!
It drives me mad! The other day she was happily asleep in her carrycot and someone asked if they could hold her. I politely replied that i'd rather she was left alone while she was sleeping and the stupid idiot started poking her to wake her up so they'd be allowed a hold!

It didn't work. I was not happy though.

People seem to pass her round and I get her back when she wants feeding. Arg.

 

[Becky]

I don't think its bad to feel this way, I'm much quicker to trust my mum than my MIL for a number of reasons (some of them MIL's own fault).

I know for a fact that my mum will listen to what I want for my baby and try and put that first but I worry that my MIL would think that what you don't know doesn't hurt you and I know she will do what she thinks will give her an easy life.

 

[NIE]

I don't think you are being over protective at all babes.

I have only ever been away from my lo for 2 1/2 hours and he is 6 months old now. I don't feel that I need any more time away from him and I defo woulndn't let my inlaws be with him for that length of time without me being there. I totaly agree with what you said about all the rules going out the window and the pass the baby is such a pain. I have actually stopped visiting people because of it. x

 

[Penstraze]

I think its important you do what your comfortable with!!
My mother in law has said about having baby there for evenings to baby sit and over night if we want to go clubbing or have a late night I think I will be ok with this I think its important for me to learn to leave baby for short periods from an early age as she will be going to nursery at 6 months so we will both have to get used to a bit of time apart but I think how comfortable I feel with it when it comes to it depends how much MIL goes along with what I want rather then telling me how I should be doing things - I think she will be fine. If I didn't feel comfortable with it though I wouldn't do it no mater who it upset!!

 

[hennaly]

thanks everyone im so pleased im not alone, i know it isnt going to go down well but i am going to stick to my guns

 

[lea m]

I dont think your overprotective either!!
Kids first stayed at my mams about 2 years ago! haha

 

[Lola's Mummy]

My LO has never stayed anywhere overnight!

I've only recently started leaving her at my mum's during the day but i wouldn't have even started doing that if i hadn't of being going back to work