Am I being unreasonable?

[Belfa]

Hi

Ok so a quick background, my first cycle of clomid failed and I've just taken my second round at an increased dose and have added metformin.

I have my tracking scan on Monday to see if it has worked and then we can BD after that.

Anyway, DH is just off the phone to his friend who is going on a skiing holiday tomorrow for 10days and his siblings have had to pull out so he's been offered a free holiday. Of course this means that he will be away during ovulation if I ovulate.

I would never tell him not to go but tbh I'm pretty upset as this could be the first time I've ovulated and how will I know it won't be the last for a couple of months? If I had a normal system then I wouldn't have an issue.

DH is also project managing our major house rebuild and ill be left to do it as well as picking up the workers etc in the morning which means ill be late for work myself - DH is self employed and works locally whereas I work in the city so it's a bigger issue if I'm late.

Not sure whether to put my foot down on this or not and I have no one to talk to about it xx

 

[nicejuicypear]

I don't think you're being unreasonable, you're meant to be in this together and you're taking this medication which is having who knows what kind of effect on your body, so you can make a family together. A free holiday is lovely and all that, but he needs to think what his priorities are.

 

[Belfa]

Glad I'm not the only one who think so! Incidental he is at the indoor slopes just now as anther friend had a free slot - he's not skied (is that a word?!) in over 10 years and get this past couple of hours have been eventful! I've only had a call on the phone so ill be interested to see what he says when he comes home about it.

He's also just been off work for 2 weeks over Xmas and we're away for 2 weeks in February
, I think that's too much leave in a short space of time too x

 

[lisey]

I think I would feel the same as you on this one. A free holiday is fab but like you say, Ov can be unpredictable and I wouldn't want to miss a potential opportunity. I clearly told my OH that he had to let me know any dates he had to go away for work so that I could check if it was over my fertile time or not so that he could work around it.
Hopefully he will come back and tell you he has decided not to go. It does also sound like a lot of time to take off in a short space of time x

 

[Londongirl]

I really hope he decides not to go. I don't think it is unreasonable to ask him not to. You only get a few tries on clomid, personally I would have been devastated if we'd wasted one for sth like that.

Fx he comes to the right decision on his own xx

 

[her13]

I'd be gutted too I don't think your being unreasonable but then men can be funny about these things mine would probably accuse me of pressuring him if I asked him not to go(which I probably would ) I don't think they understand ovulation and timings etc and that you've only got a small window each month and even more important if your having treatments, hopefully he doesn't go! Xxx

 

[Belfa]

Morning ladies!

Thank you for your advice, it really means alot to know I'm not just being a crazy ttcer!

I'm pleased to say he hasn't gone but as we're staying with my parents they had to intervene and my mums words persuaded him not to go. If anything, I really hope he's learnt a life lesson from this. Of course by bed time the apologetic side of him had worn off and he was beginning to blame me from blocking him having fun etc - I'll see what he's saying about it tonight but I'm quite stubborn so there's no way I'm taking responsibility for this!

 

[Londongirl]

I think that's really mean of him to say you've blocked him from having fun (although I suspect it's something said in the heat of the moment rather than genuinely meant). Ttc is by definition a team effort and once you are pregnant / have a baby there will be plenty of sacrifices you will both have to make.

I'd tell him to man up!!

 

[Blueflower]

I think you are being perfectly reasonable! I can see how he might feel that he needs a break but then you do even more! Its not fair how they put things like that on us sometimes!
Hope he doesn't sulk, mine would!