Advice Please!!!

[dannii87]

Grr I need to vent (my parents are on holiday so I'm home alone with my 17 yr old brother) so I have no-one to vent to really

I'm dreading work tomorrow... My boss (the MD) is really horrible, on Thursday she was in her office and she asked my colleague to ask me for some paperwork. I was on the phone so I just gave my colleague the folder where the paperwork she was after was, 2 minutes later the MD comes storming out and THROWS the folder on my desk (denting it so it doesn't close properly anymore) and shouted (& spat ) "WHEN I F*CKING ASK FOR SOMETHING, GIVE ME IT. DON'T MAKE ME TRAPSE THROUGH A F*CKING FOLDER" and out of anger slammed a desk drawer shut and threw a pen across the office.

She also said to my colleague (who's just turned 18 ) in front of everyone;

"Have you got bloody spellcheck on your emails? I'm going to take a stab in the dark and say NO. Sort it out, your spelling is f*cking awful"

& she came into the office, didn't say hell to anyone, sat down for about 20 seconds, turned round to us girls and was furious that no-one had offered her a cup of tea. She said to the same colleague "you going to get off your arse and make me a tea then?" she said yes and went to make one, and the MD said "at f*cking last!"

She hasn't apologised and hasn't been in since, but she's back tomorrow and I'm dreading it. She's really making me dread work at the moment and I keep trying to think up excuses to take days off!!! Really, I don't want to work anymore

xx

 

[claireyfairey]

Oh my god what a bitch!!! Is there anyone you can complain to??? That is just unprofessionnal behaviour and is so out of order. I am angry for you!!!

 

[nickilubs]

My goodness!!!!

Slap the bitch! Is there anyone you can report her to? Her behaviour is shocking!!!! Start to write down everything she is doing and get others in the office to record their occurances with her. She has no right to act like that towards anyone!

 

[dannii87]

Just to add, I haven't actually taken any days off! But I have been thinking all night what I could say to give me reason to take a few days off...

...I know it's probably just a coincidence because of my iron and the stress of results etc, but my psoriasis is TERRIBLE at the moment, I have painful SPD and I'm waking up daily dreading work. I'm tired, stressed and just hate it.

She's even suggested that I might not be able to take my holiday before my maternity leave on the day I'd booked (which was 22md July, I'd be 36 weeks) because she authorised holiday but didn't realise 2 of us were already off the first 4 days of my holiday leave I know it sounds stupid, but postponing my holiday by even ONE day feels like THE worst thing that could happen right now xx

 

[MagicMarkers]

She sounds like the mega biatch outta the devil wears prada, jesus what crawled up her bum n died !!!

Surely theres someone who can say something to her without risk of her wrath about being such a complete and utter COW ?!?

 

[nickilubs]

Just to add, I haven't actually taken any days off! But I have been thinking all night what I could say to give me reason to take a few days off...

...I know it's probably just a coincidence because of my iron and the stress of results etc, but my psoriasis is TERRIBLE at the moment, I have painful SPD and I'm waking up daily dreading work. I'm tired, stressed and just hate it.

She's even suggested that I might not be able to take my holiday before my maternity leave on the day I'd booked (which was 22md July, I'd be 36 weeks) because she authorised holiday but didn't realise 2 of us were already off the first 4 days of my holiday leave I know it sounds stupid, but postponing my holiday by even ONE day feels like THE worst thing that could happen right now xx

I would go to the docs and get them to sign you off till your mat leave starts. You dont need this right now.

 

[Redshoes]

omg where do you work? That's disgusting language, I don't know what to suggest, can you talk to your work colleagues about it, get some support from each other? Really hope it doesn't cause you more upset, she sounds like a very nasty piece of work, sorry I can't help

 

[dannii87]

jesus what crawled up her arse n died !!!

That is the best quote I've heard in a long time!!

Nope She's the MD... Then next person down from her is my manager who is so far up her arse it's unreal. She'd never say anything to her, that's why she gets away with it.

I might just ask to speak to her tomorrow and say that I think the way she has treated us girls lately has really affected us and hurt out feelings. It's also scary for anyone NOT involved in the incident to witness it...

Argh I hate work, I really really do. x

 

[Redshoes]

I think asking to speak to her is the adult and sensible thing to do, I just hope she respects that and listens instead of swearing and disregarding it as she seems like a real b!tch! Is it long before you can/will leave work Dannii? I really hope its soon for you

 

[Steelgoddess]

Jaysuss Danni where do you work? In Hell???

Have you been keeping a record of all of the comments? They're obviously treating you like pap because they think they can get away with it, a classic case of lets treat the pregnant woman like utter crap.

Do you have a HR department and if so what are they like?

 

[Quill]

That's really horrible. If someone slammed something down so hard that it dented my desk I'd freak out. Especially with bump sticking out about a mile, what if she'd missed and whacked that? I think she was way out of order.

I hope you're able to resolve it soon

 

[Bubalu]

Sorry to read that work is so horrible. This woman is a bully and needs to be confronted. I found a couple of websites that may help.

http://www.tuc.org.uk/tuc/rights_bullyatwork.cfm

http://www.andreaadamstrust.org/factsheet.pdf

The most useful tips I think are keeping a record of the harrassment and getting your colleagues to do the same. Go to your doctor and tell them what's happening (get signed off if necessary). Writing a memo to your boss to refute allegations or to explain yourself.

If you have written agreement to your day off, I don't see how it can be taken back...I just would take a sickie anyhow...there's not a lot they could do.

Finally, remember that she is a sad twisted woman who needs to put other people down just so she can feel important. You are superior to her and she hates that! Hold your head high and face her down when she tries anything again.

 

[hennaly]

start carrying a dictaphone and recored her believe me you can have her big time.

 

[NickyB]

Aw Dannii that's terrible and I don't know what to say. It's not acceptable with anyone however, more so in your case, doesn't she know how fragile us pregnant women can be?! I totally understand you dreading it.

You should either tell her so, stand up to her next time she does it (not rudely) and it might make her think twice about abusing the office next time, orrrr.... you can sit back and let it all go over you, you can't be far off maternity leave? I know I can't do the third one though!

 

[Hazel]

Sounds like you work for Naomi Campbell

Did you go today?? I would go to the doctor and asked to be signed of. They are very sympathetic when pregnant as they don't want to be in trouble if anything happens when you've asked to be signed off.

It sounds like she has some sort of problem. Normal people don;t go around shouting and swearing like that. Next time she's doing it I would say to her calmly that she needs to calm down and don't think it's appropriate for her to be using that sort of language. Might shame her into behaving.

 

[kalia]

If you are in any discomfort from the SPD you shouldn't be at work. That's what my work told me

If you get signed off for the next 4 weeks they can force you to start maternity leave from 36 weeks. I know you wanted to start your holidays then and I don't know if it would mean losing the holidays but at least you could escape early.

 

[lulu]

That is horrendous behaviour and extremely unprofessional. Its horrible and the worst feeling when you dread work, even more so when your pregnant. I started dreading going to work and the doctor signed me off sick until my leave started.

Oh, and if she has agreed to your holiday, its tough, not your problem she has agreed 2 other peoples leave. Even if she is the MD, she has no right to speak to anyone like that - what a cow! do you have a HR department or something along those lines.

Hopefully you will finish soon, but there is no way you should put up with that!

 

[Tadpole]

I've just read this...Oh my god, what a biatch! And a mental one at that!!

Y'know what - you don't owe her anything. Make a record of all these incidents and then get yourself signed off till your holiday/mat leave starts. Balls to her, quite frankly, she will just have to cope.

 

[Mrs_Jay]

OMG no one should be allowed to act like that in a working environment

 

[Mildly]

What a nightmare place to work, poor you

To be honest I think you're doing incredibly well dragging yourself out of bed with your low iron levels and with SPD pains. I would really be tempted to take some time off. However I suppose you run the risk of her being even more of a bitch when you get back! I think if you get signed off now work can force your maternity leave to start almost immediately (if they know that you won't be back before you are due to start your leave - although don't quote me on that).

Are you planning on returning to work there after your maternity leave ends?