Will I ever get the chance to be a mummy? :(

[broody2013]

Hi,

We have been married for 6 months now and were tempted to TTC straight away as we both want a baby. I am 24 and my husband is 31 so he is keen to have a baby while he is still young, but we know we have time ahead of us yet.

My husband was made redundant just before our wedding which was horrible, so he has had to start on the bottom rung of the career ladder as he worked his way up his last job. His pay is not good.

I am not 100% well, I have ME which makes me very tired, I may have to live with it for life and there is potential for it to worsten during pregnancy. I am the main earner (although I'm not on that much either).

We are spending what we earn. We have decided to be really careful with our money and go completely to ALDI and LIDL now and not to buy any clothes or things for the house or anything that is not completely essential.

What I want to know is has anyone been in a similar situation? At this rate I will be in my 40s before we can even think about this.

I sit up crying about this. I can't understand how we work really hard and we just can't see a way of coping especially if I get worse health in my pregnancy and can't go back to work at all or for as much afterwards.

 

[KatR]

Hello Sweet,
I am sorry to hear that you are feeling down. I think you must focus on the fact that you are both very young and that is on your side. There is no shame in shopping in Aldi and Lidle, we could afford to shop anywhere and we choose to shop in Aldi only because saving is very important for us. It all started the where you are and we are now doing great. Please have faith in your Husband and don't be afraid of talking to him about your concerns. Sometimes it will feel like you are but eventually it'll all work out. Your illness is scary but doctors are sometimes wrong and your condition may not get worse at all.

Above all you must stay positive. I hope my words were encouraging, I honestly wish you all the best and send you some love dust:

 

[Eryinera]

The thing is, There is never a perfect time to have a child. You never earn enough and you are never fit enough! The doctors know next to nothing about how pregnancy effects anything in my opinion! I don;t have anything like what you have but I got told my simple things like migranes and allergies would get worse and I wouldn't be able to take my normal meds when pregnant so expect pain and discomfort basically! One of my "triggers" is a hormone progesterone which is increased during pregnancy. However I didn't suffer a single headache let alone migrane during pregnancy. When we had our first I was working flat out on min wage and my other half was the same. We didn't buy anything excpet food, we didn't go out much or anything. We didn't even live together e both lived with our parents!!

But we found out we were expecting we scraped together a deposit for a house, we changed jobs, and we saved where we could and sold what we could on auction sites and now I say we live fairly comfortably. amd we are hoping we can make another addition to our family in the not too distant future!