What Do I Do?

[dannii87]

Girls, I'm sobbing uncontrollably... Evie is screaming & I need to vent before I run away this morning!!

Evie doesn't seem impressed by my left boob... I can't understand why? She goes on, has about 2 sucks, pulls off then goes back on (which kills!). I know there is milk in there because as she comes off some oozes out. I know she is hungry because she is due a feed

I know some will say to offer the 2nd breast, but my right breast hurts even WORSE! I am wincing through EVERY feed on that boob & it is agony. I have to breathe through the feed the pain is that bad...

After much faffing around, she seems to be less unsettled on my left boob...

What do I do? She doesn't like my better boob & my right boob is about to fall off... & what the hell do I do about the pain with my right nipple? It's getting to the point where I feel like just shoving a bottle in her mouth & giving up.

xx

 

[handbagqueen]

oh dannii, i'm sorry i don't know what to suggest for you as i use nipple shields so its a bit different. probably obvious but i know lily is a pain at the boobwhen she has trapped wind- put her down, walk away for a few minutes to calm yourself and the put her acrossd your knees and see if that has an effect- then try again. don;t give up- your doing so well

 

[dannii87]

Thanks Isia

I've got nipple shields, but on my right boob it hurts more WITH one than without

I honestly don't know how much longer I can put up with this. I panic when she starts stirring & she's due on he right boob.

We seem to be coming across soooo many hurdles with breastfeeding;

- She has thrush of the mouth.
- I have it on the nipples.
- She has a tongue tie.
- She doesn't sleep well at all so seems to feed often.
- My nipples are cracked & sore.

GRRRRRRRRRRRR

 

[Beatlesfan]

Aw Dannii you poor thing. I know exactly what you mean. I went through much the same thing with Imogen. The only words of advice I can offer are those which others told me and it got me through:

1. Persevere - your milk takes time to settle in knowing how much to produce for LO and how often. I can honestly say it took about 6/7 weeks before I realy felt that it all settled and that my boobs/milk finally "got it" and were in tune with Imogen's feeding patterns.

2. Cry, rest, eat/drink when you need to - your hormones are all over the place still and doing these as and when you need will certainly help you to maintain the energy you need and to stay calm (blood sugar levels etc.)

3. Remember that breastfeeding is HARD WORK and takes time.... I felt under so much pressure (prob putting pressure o myself) to get it right and expected it all to come so naturally and be perfect at it. it did feel natural to me but it was harder than I thought, especially the first 6 weeks. Every feed is a success Dannii for you and Evie and allow yourself that success. you are doing a grand job Honey.

4. Babies do not feed "perfectly" by that I mean they don't just latch on strightaway, suck suck suck, come off gently and then wind (oh how I wished it was like that and TBH I expected it to be like this....oooooh how naive!!) They fuss, they pull on and off the nipple roughly sometimes, they don't always latch well, they comfort suck etc. Accept this and be prepared to try different things to help LO and yourself in making feeding better for you both.

5. Leading on from above, try different things. Imogen always had a preference for my right boob. I found for a while I had to breast feed her on my left in the rugby ball position on a pillow as she seemed to prefer lying on the left side of her face to suckle (as was her position when feeding from right boob...see link below.

rugby ball position

6. LOs really do tend to take what they need so don't fret if she doesn't seem to take much. It all balances out over the day.

7. Have you tried expressing a bit of milk to relieve the pain of the build up of milk, I expect that may be what your pain is, although keep an eye on things and speak to your HV if you suspect mastitis.

8. Talk to you HV (if you feel you can) as she may be able to watch you breatsfeed and offer advice. I needed some practical help in the early stages and after a while I didn't care who looked at my baps or rearranged them to help Imogen feed!! It really helped.

Well I may think of some more advice I can share, but there are a few suggestions that may help you and Evie.
If you are determined to breast feed I would say keep at it and get as much support from your mum etc. to help out at other times, e.g. look after Evie so you can rest between feeds etc.

but, if it is making you and Evie unhappy and you feel you would both be happier if she had formula then do it. you may find you feel guilty/sad at this prospect and I think it's very natural to feel this way. But happy mummy=happy baby andf vice versa - you have given her a really good start Dannii and be proud of that.

Good luck hun. I hope things improve for you. Keep posting for support and of course to share successes x x x

 

[Beatlesfan]

ah I have just read your last post.... the thrush thing makes a lot of sense now with regards to your pain.

My tips may not be appropriate advice for you now hun now I know the context. maybe someone who has had thrush (and their LO) like you might be able to offer some advice???

But I reiterate do what is best for you and Evie. you have given her a really good start hun.

Thrush is not nice anywhere on/in the body! And your boobs may be more sensitive..... poor you... I sympathise.

Does expressing help? (if you've tried it?) - maybe if you wanted to keep her on breast milk you could express and introduce bottle until it all clears. I know they say not to introduce bottle until 6 weeks after breast feeding is established, but Imogen had a bottle of EBM form 2 weeks and she was great with it. She had a mixture of breast milk from boob, EBM in bottle and formula from about 6 weeks. I was almost going to stop entirely as breastfeeding in public was a nightmare for me, and the hassle of taking EBM out was a nightmare, but formula changed all that and I was much happier. Also meant OH and others could feed her.

Hugs for you Sweetie

 

[dannii87]

Thank you SO much for your kibnd words beatlesfan! That really has helped me no end. Just to hear words of encouragement like that help me to put things in perspective.

She's getting her tongue clipped next week (Thurs) and I refuse to give up til then So that is now my next milestone! (She'll be almost 4 weeks old). Hopefully having her tongue clipped will allow her to latch!

After reading your reply, I've got the breast pump out! Going to give that a shot til my nips recover a bit!

Sorry for the moan, I wrote that at 8:48am and had been feeding the fussy thing since 5am so I was shattered & miserable!!

xxx

 

[Beatlesfan]

Ah glad to be of help. Breast feeding is so emotional and it's exhausting too!

Take care and rest well when you can. Will be thinking of you. I expressed successfully (like a super dooper milk machine....5oz in as many minutes!!!) and it certainly gave me a break from feeding at times - feeding Imogen could taken an hour sometimes and it was just nice to drink my tea warm while OH/someone else fed her.

Good luck sweetie x x

 

[zebrastripes]

Dannii, you're doing fantastically Beastlesfan has given you some really brilliant advice there... only another week and hopefully things will start to ease up big clap for doing so well in spite of all the trouble you've been having with BF

 

[purple13]

good advice from the others there dannii and nothing i can really add.

you're doing so amazingly well - take it a day at a time and it will be next week before you know it. hopefully evie's tongue clipping will make a difference for you both.

i know how much it hurts - and i know what its like to dread each feed; i started to really dislike my own baby and it was all down to how awful every feed was. all i can say is that it DOES get better. and in time will become the most amazing thing you've ever done. stick with it honey - bloody-mindedness will get you a long way

 

[Penstraze]

Aww Dannii so sorry to hear of your problems I have been quite fortunate to have not had many hurdles on the feeding stakes except perhaps too much milk, I found Kara had trouble latching on my left breast as it was always so full and every unsuccesful feed left it fuller so I hand expressed some milk before feeding her and that helped her to latch on properly. I've just used my breast pump fpr the first time today and was so suprised it didnt hurt at all and was quick and simple im so pleased with it hopefully expressing and feeding that way will help until your in less pain

 

[kelsey]

Hi Danni, it can get hard with tongue tie, my l/o has it and she kept on falling off the breast. I cant imagine how it must feel with thrush too. With practice she can learn to feed better even with the tongue tie.

 

[flowergirl]

Just sending loads of my LO hasn't ever had any probs breastfeeding but I've just endured 4 hours of screaming and feeding which has been bad enough (growth spurt!!!!!) I finally filled her up by resorting to giving her afew ounces of EBM- I think she's sucked me dry!

You have ALL of my sympathy- I hope your LO's and your probs are resolved soon xxx Good on ya for keeping going!

 

[jills10uk]

would you think about trying to express your milk and giving it to her in a bottle? until evie gets a better latch after her tongue tie op?

 

[Kimberly]

Sending you lots of . I went through many of the same things you did (tongue tie, constant feeding, etc.) and I know how hard it is. I cried many many times and didn't think I would make it, but we have now been breastfeeding for 3 months. Things did get better once August had his tongue tie released, but it did take a few days for us. He wasn't able to latch on at all before ( I had to express and bottle feed until then), but the other people at the clinic who had been able to latch, but painfully noticed a difference straight away. We still struggled, but at about 8 weeks something just clicked and we have been doing fine ever since. I love breastfeeding now!

I'm not sure if this will help you, or what positions you are using, but I've heard that when LO fusses with one boob you should hold them in the rugby position, that way it tricks them into thinking they are on the other boob.

Hang in there and good luck for Thursday!

 

[Mrs_Jay]

i havent got any advice as you know my nips are a bit sore too but i think the expressing sounds like a good idea until she has her op. really hope it then gets better for you hun

 

[handbagqueen]

Blimey Dannii, i didn;t realise how much you were going through- so sorry- hope it all gets a bit better for you soon

 

[Mildly]

I totally sympathise Dannii Oscar can be so fussy on the boob, constantly pulling off and trying to eat his fist instead, even though he is hungry. I sometimes find that making him suck my finger for 30 secs or so can calm him down and refocus his mind on the boob and then he will feed properly. I also have one boob that hurts so much more at the beginning of a feed than the other, I am really hoping this will pass soon.

Also I find lying down and feeding Oscar on the bed can be a better position for him. I haven't tried the rugby ball hold but only because he is so huge, long and wriggly that I'm not sure I could hold him like that. Hope the expressing works for you and that things get easier

Also I'd love to hear how you get on after you have Evie's tie released. We are definitely going to mention it at my post natal doctors appointment as the midwives seem unwilling to do anything about it