Waiting breaking my heart

[her13]

My partner wants to wait a year or two to try again, we have been trying the last year after my misscarriage and nothing happened, he wants to wait for good reasons like getting more money together etc and getting married, an I agree but I just don't want to feel these desperate feelings I don't want to want a. Baby right now if you know what I mean, I had a meltdown last night after sex out of nowhere it's really breaking my heart, I've had two miscarriages which I know is why I feel this way but how do I turn my emotions off? They are so strong it hurts so much when I think about it and I know I'm just going to have to bury it all nowhere or two years, I feel like I've messed it up and missed my chance as this past year I've had all the chances this is just so tough!

 

[lisey]

Its not your fault hun xx
I don't really have any advice as I know I would feel the same if I had to wait. After my last miscarriage I was advised to wait until after a laparoscopy and then I had to wait for all my miscarriage tests and results (which is in a couple of weeks). Its been 7 months since my erpc and I have struggled at times. I tried to find a new focus, took up a hobby (photography) and enrolled on a course etc. There has always been that yearning though, I can't shift it but I had to accept it.
If you feel that you don't want to wait then maybe have a chat with your OH about how its making you feel? x

 

[her13]

Thank you xx I think I will try to find something else to focus on too, I have spoke to him but he said if I couldn't wait we would have to think about splitting as he's decided he really doesn't want one right now il just have to hope it's not too long there's nothing else I can do as I couldn't bare losing him aswell. So hard to shake the feelings of failure I will have to try though , thank u xx

 

[lisey]

Oh hun, he may come around. It could be sadness of it all right now. I hope things improve for you soon, miscarriages are so devastating xx