TTC after D&C

[bnelson]

I had a D&C yesterday morning at nearly 11 weeks. Our sweet baby stopped growing at 9 weeks.

I asked the nurse who did our initial ultrasound and told us the bad news and both a nurse and a doctor in the hospital how soon I could start trying again and all of them said I could start once the bleeding stops and I'm "emotionally healed". They suggest waiting until after my first cycle but many women fall pregnant before then.

But I don't think I'll ever be "emotionally healed". I don't think I'll ever get over this. I've been up all night reading about conceiving after a D&C... reading and reading. The only thing I want to do is to try again. I don't want to wait. I need to be pregnant again. I'm terrified of this happening again but... I have to try, it's the only thing that is going to make me feel any better.

I'm delirious. I've gotten maybe 6 hours sleep (minus the anesthesia) over the last 48 hours. I just... I need a baby. I still have what looks like a small belly, my breasts still hurt, but I'm empty.

I need a baby.

Idk what I'm asking. For support, I guess?

 

[Emily0505]

I know just how you feel!hun and I'm so very sorry for your loss.

After my first mc I was just consumed with the need to get pregnant again. It was all I could think about all day every day and all I could dream about at night.

My first mc was natural and we started TTC as soon as I'd stopped bleeding. My second mc I had an erpc at the hospital and again we started right away. My third mc was natural and we took a break after that while waiting for tests. I have to say that it was a relief to stop trying for a while and to think about other things as TTC had comsiumed our lives for the best part of two years.

As for healing emotionally, it does get better with time but it'll never go away completely. I still think of my three angels all the time. I'm pregnant again now, just under 30 weeks and when I talk to anyone about this pregnancy I always mention the miscarriages as I want people to know what we've lost and what we've been through to get to this point.

Big hugs sweetheart, be kind to yourself.

XX

 

[Melly41]

So sorry to hear that, its no wonder you are left feeling empty. I agree, you probably won't ever get over it, but it will get easier. I do not have any experience in trying again after a loss but would think being patient and making sure you are both ready again is wise. Having something else to focus on and take the pain away might sound like the more favourable option, but it is important for you both to have time to grieve. It will still be very raw for you both and you probably do need sa bit of time to gather your thoughts. If you've had not much sleep over the last 48 hours, you will not necessarily be thinking clearly, you probably need to rest up, get some sleep and then talk it through with you OH and perhaps come up with a plan of when to try again. You may still decide trying straight away is the best thing. I wish you all the best and hope your journey in ttc is a short one and your next pregnancy is a happy and healthy one x

 

[Rainbow1234]

I felt exactly like you when I had my first mc, which also ended with a d&c, I needed to get pregnant again, I was kind of obsessed with it and needed to know my body could do it. I think I be came so obsessed and stressed that it had a negative effect on ttc though. 8 months after my mc I was using opks, timing it, thinking every month I was pregnant but I still wasn't. But I think that time is honestly a healer, at that point I decided I couldn't live my life like that anymore and relaxed, I got pregnant that month but unfortunately had another mc, it still hurt but it didn't affect me in the same way as the first one. I continued on being relaxed and 2 cycles later got pregnant with my daughter who's now 1. To me it feels surreal that all of that even happened, I've not forgotten but it just doesn't feel real. I promise you it does get easier but try not to go
Down the route I did and become obsessed because I really believe it doesn't help. Wishing you all the luck in the world x