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too much info.SEX/stitches ??

specialbump

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ok guys my first birth was in 2004 all went fine it was a normal vaginal birth but i tore and they took me for stitches after i was discharged i was extremely uncomfy and things just didnt feel right when i went to the toilet midwife said all was fine but got to the point stitches disolved and i was to sore i thaught they put too many stitches in and i was too tight i was stitched alot but they insisted it was still fine so thaught it was just discomfort.6months after the birth i ventired into having sex for the first time and very nevrous about it as i still dodnt feel right and it hurt like hell and i was bleeding went to a gp they said all looked fine and didnt know why.and so this day still stands when i have sex and he slips out we all have experianced it at some point were it jabs just below ur love tunnel(the chin rest) lol i feel were i am scared .im due in july and petrefied i will tear again and it will make this a whole lot worse any one else had this problem or can relate to the feeling ??
 
I'm so sorry that I can't actually help but I just wanted to say that I had my baby 3 weeks ago and I'm experiencing the exact same problems. Only I haven't tried sex yet. I didn't get cut but I tore and needed 16 stitches. I can barely walk and can't stand for longer than 1 minute. Midwives have checked and said everything looks fine and normal.

Really hope you get some advice honey x
 
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My experience wasnt the same as you as I was cut...had stitches...painful for months...didn't have sex for months either haha
I can definitely relate...I think the thing I remember most was the fear...the fear of having a number two for the first time, the pain when weeing, the hesitation/anxiety when I was about to have sex...and I think the fear makes it worse....if you havent done already, tell your midwife of your concerns in the hope she can reassure you somewhat...
And try to focus on that beautiful baby that you're going to be holding in July...worth every bit of pain if you ask me :-)
Xxx
 
Sorry you are having probs. it's not nice after a baby. Women heal at different times.

I just wanted to try and reassure you though :)

I had episiotomy with first and it extended to 3 rd degree :(
Like you, sex was an issue for ages, also caused psychological issues for me. It did heal in the end, and we did have more children so sex did happen again lol

But I was like you, scared I'd tear again. What I did was read positive birth stories, and perineal massage. I would urge you to do the massage. It does feel strange but gets you used to the feeling of having the tissues stretched a little, and you relax as you get used to the way it feels. It helped me both physically and psychologically.

Good birthing positions are a must too. Keep off your back. Try baths, even a water birth. If you don't fancy that, warm flannels on the perineum help to keep it supple. But really try the perineal massage.
Found this for you :)

http://www.kch.nhs.uk/Doc/PL - 522.1 - Antenatal Perineal Massage - Information for Women.pdf
 

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