Tick Tock Biological Clock?

[Summer88]

Hello all!

I am new to this forum so thought I would say hey!
Wasn't sure where to go with the way I have been feeling lately so thought I would post here.
Have been with my other half about 3-4 years now and we bought our home a year ago. When we met we were open about whether or not we wanted children and both of us said we weren't bothered either way and I stopped thinking about it.
Lately (coming up to my 29th birthday next month may be why!) I can't stop thinking about whether or not I want children and I keep getting this strange nagging feeling that I really do and it gets stronger all the time. My other half is 6 years older and he said he doesn't want to be an 'older dad' though I keep trying to tell him he isn't even old yet! It makes me feel likes hes saying he doesn't want kids. When I bring it up he says we aren't even married yet so not to stress over it....
problem is I am female so all I do is stress about it

Has anyone else felt like they need to make a decision and soon? I know I am not old but I know that between 30 and 35 is optimum decision time on this and really with the other half being a tad older maybe not even that long.
Also I keep getting this horrible feeling that I am too selfish to ever be a mum anyway. Do things change once the baby comes? I wasn't born desperately wanting to be a mum but it's something that has been getting stronger recently.
Sorry for the rant but I am all over the place, I have literally not been this confused ever! anyone ever feel the same?

 

[CockerMum]

Hi Summer,

I have just turned 30, havent really thought about children much. Told OH when i got with him that i wasnt that bothered then after a year of being with him something suddenly changed (no idea what) but then it became an obssession, i saw babies everywhere, dreamt of them etc. Had a chat with OH and he was happy to start trying. we have been ttc now for 2 years and are currently planning our ivf route as things havent worked out naturally due to my previous contraception.

I always thought i wouldnt make a good mum as i like my sleep etc etc but we got a pup and that all changed, i know its not the same but we couldnt sleep as much as we wanted or we needed a babysitter for him when we go out for long periods etc. i wouldnt change him for the world he is my furbaby, we all just slipped into a new routine without so much as a thought.

Me and my OH arent married yet - i am hoping we asks when we finally get our BFP so i can be pregnant when we marry. It hasnt really entered our mind about marriage tbh. We arent tradtitional in that way and are happy with our r/ship atm altho he has always said that he would marry me.

Maybe a proper chat with OH about how your feeling etc. What contraception are you using? I was on the depo then the pill for 3 months. the depo has really messed my body up.

 

[BettyHoop]

I just have to add that feeling of worrying whether you are too selfish to be a mum? It totally changes once you have a baby, I've just had my first and this was something that I became quite worried about during pregnancy especially. Now I realise I was silly for wasting my time worrying. There's no way to explain how amazing it is being a mum, everything else becomes insignificant. It's the most natural thing in the world and I can't imagine life without my child now. Xx

 

[KHTW]

Once you hold this little person in your arms for the first time you realise this is your life, love, your everything! The day my daughter was born was the best day of my life... next to the day she said mummy for the first time! Don't overthink things, don't worry to much. If you feel you are ready (physically, mentally and financially - all 3 are equally important, in my opinion) then go for it! Xx