TEAM Yellow Vs Pink/Blue

[l_maclean]

Hiya,

As most of you prob know Im not allowed to know the sex from my NHS scans, and i was pretty ok with this - im not majorly fussed - and to behonest im too cheap to pay for a private scan simply to find out.

However - there is a TWIST. Its my birthday in a couple of days and DH has decided to pay for a private scan as theres a place in Perth (couple of hrs from us) thats not too expensive.

Little bit of history here - the scan is mostly for my mum's benefit - she's having a really hard time just now as her little sis has been given 4-6months to live from breast cancer, and her mum has cancer of the gall bladder which is really rare, completely untreatable - and basically my gran is in the unique situation of having no symptoms which her docs have never seen before and cant give a prognosis.

Short version is Mum is pretty stressed out. DH also thought she was a bit put put that a friend came to my extra scan with me when DH couldnt get time of work(should prob point out that my friends are more my mothers age than mine)

So - sorry for long story, but it seemed easier to explain - but basically seeing as we've decided to have a scan Im now having to decide if i wanna know the sex.

Just wondered why people choose to find out/Not find out - and what people think are the pros and cons of both ways. (im sooooo indecisive right now. lol)

 

[Princess81]

Well I'm team yellow. Whilst I found it frustrating for a while - I'm glad with my decision again now. Your baby is one of the few mysteries left in life. There are ways and means to find out everything these days, and I know baby's gender is the same issue - u can find out but I think it's nice to wait and see what nature has in store. I can understand why people want to know but I am uber excited about my wee surprise. Downside is you don't know what colour clothes to buy and have to pick out both boys and girls names. I suppose u need a neutral nursery and pram too. But that's all i can think of xx

 

[Rachaellius]

Well I decided not to find out because I love suprises and just really wanted that special moment when I give birth for them to say 'you have a daughter' or 'you have a son'. Plus I heard it gives you a lot more insentive to push and gives you a bit more of a boost because you're keen to find out the sex aswell as having your newborn in your arms . I think if it was my second I'd find out purely for convenience like whether I could reuse stuff or whether we'd need another bedroom etc. But seen as it's my first it really doesn't make a difference to me what the sex is, there's a lot of nice unisex stuff about too xxx

 

[Lilelephant]

I found out cos j could! I feel it has helped me bond with bump as I call him by his name etc but I wouldn't have been annoyed if they couldt hve told me!

 

[l_maclean]

At the moment Im kinda leaning towards the finding out. Simply because im really only doing this extra scan for my mum - so i dont see me having the chance to find out with any more kids we have - so this way i can do the being organised thing once and have surprises later.

Our big purchase like pram etc will need to be neutral anyway cos we're planning on at least one more. Nursery might have to wait a wee while because at moment it has our spare bed in it and i want my folks to be able to come up to visit while LO is in our room (plus budgetery constraints right now means decorating is kinda low priority).

My down side is that I dunno that i'd be able to keep it quiet - but my head knows i dont wanna tell everyone right away. Also i might be tempted to go a bit crazy with the shopping - at moment i look at all the cute boy and girl things then walk away - but dunno that would last long.

One major thing is having really really hard time with girls name - so if its a girl would need to really think - where as if its a boy we can relax cos thats sorted.

xxx

 

[Princess81]

Mmmmmh. Does your mum want to know the sex? There's no way you'll be able to keep it quiet x

 

[l_maclean]

she's not really fussed. She just laughed when i said i didnt think i'd be able to keep quiet. lol

xxx

 

[jomc]

Well this is our first and we are team yellow.
I just feel there are so few surpeises in life that if I can have one I will. Same as one of the others said, I think it will be a huge incentive to push as I will be dying to find out and waiting for them to say "its a girl" or "its a boy".
The downside is sticking to unisex clothes... everything we have is white, lemon or beige. But that will only be or a few days cos once people know what uv had most presents u get will be either specifically for a boy or girl.

We have a 4d scan tomorrow and will be telling them we dont want to know. Having said that, if we found out by accident which we very nearly did at our 22 week scan, I wouldnt be heartbroken

 

[Sleepy sue]

I'm hoping to stay team yellow, pretty much same reasons as everyone else it is going to be a real surprise. I am a little nervous though as both oh and I keep talking to it like it's a boy I'm sure we wouldn't be disappointed if it's a girl though.
Tbh if this was the only one that you have a chance of finding out with then I would find out. You then get to experience both when you have your nxt lo x x

 

[Lulabell]

I'm team yellow. The reason for me being team yellow was I wasn't fussed either way to having a boy or girl, so long as it's healthy etc. Also, you don't get many surprises in life and thought it would be something extra to make me push harder lol.

I can see why some would want to know though cos it does make it easier with buying clothes etc. Although we haven't had a problem, we have tonnes of clothes now lol.

Hope this helps.xx

 

[ippa]

I found out!
1 because I was so desperate to know,
2 so I could get properly prepared and with a slight lack of funds that was a god send!

I loved being able to call him by his name before he was born! But I think everyone looks at it differently, alot of my family members didn't want to know until he was born!
XxX

 

[Sarah13]

Hi! I've now had 3 scans at Perth, they are brilliant there, really take time with you, we've a naughty/shy baby so have to keep going back as it always has it's face covered, going to try once more next week sometime. Long drive from Aberdeen though! As you can tell we've stayed team yellow, much to my husbands disappointment lol! I really want that magical moment your told after all the effort of giving birth, it is like the cherry on top for me. I'd hate to know cos I love all the guessing and wondering!

 

[Mrs N]

I just felt that if they can find out then why not find out the sex!! FIrstly I think it breaks up the pregnancy a bit as you find out the sex roughly in the middle but also it allows you to buy stuff that he will use as opposed to stuff to make do till you know the sex!!
But at the end of the day it depends on whether you want thesurprise on the bigday!!
xxxx

 

[TashaWink]

i think we're going to find out...but i don't want to be told...i want them to find it first and then let me decide if i want to know for sure! (i should be able to tell-seeing as i've been to a few gender scanning with my sister) But we DEFINITELY wont be telling anyone! Just pretend you never found out I like all the beige and whites anyway so Baby will have lots of that!

The OH is the one that will blab-so thats why i want to have them find it then decide whether or not (because he wont be able to tell) cheeky i know!

 

[positivity :)]

i wish i could have stayed team yellow, OH wanted to find out so we did. when you find out the feeling changes from 'my baby' to 'my little boy/girl' which i felt made it more real but of course i'm suggesting you feel closer or not as i wouldnt know.

if you can, i'd stay team yellow, that's what i'm planning on doing next time

xx

 

[ISH]

We decided we wanted to find out from the first, and as soon as we knew it was a boy, it's helped with the bonding tremendously. OH was 'just waiting for the baby' to start bonding, and I wasn't feeling particularly maternal either (felt more ill than pregnant), but knowing it's a little man in there has changed things a lot.

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Theres a team yellow thread in tri2.. maybe have a read through that?

Im so glad we didnt find out with this LO.. its defo made the preg go faster as after 20w with the girls (OH wanted to find out so we had to) it really dragged from then on..

I think it will helpme through my labour and as we arent fussed which sex we have it makes sense to wait.. do whats right for you, if your not sure if u wanna find out id say dont... or youd regret it.. if u find out and regret it theres nothing u can do... but if u dont find out and regret it.. youll still get to find out at the end of it!

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Also the scan itself will help bonding if youve found it hard... ive admittedly found it so hard to bond with this baby but after our 4d scan its really helped me prepare and be so excited about it/come to terms with it x

 

[l_maclean]

Thanks so much for all the advice ladies. I think I'm gonna go with the finding out (although given I haven't actually booked the scan yet I may still change my mind, lol)

Main reason is this is prob only chance we'll get to know, so we can do the surprise next time. Also been thinking about the bonding bit that a few of you mentioned, I'm convinced in my head it's a girl (no idea why!), and I think I might find it difficult to bond wit newborn if it's a boy ( not that I'm fussed if it is though, just would need to get head round fact I was wrong!) and as I've suffered wit depression before I think it would put my mind at ease. Also DH is a wee bit disconnected at mo (which I guess is normal for a guy) so I think it would help him.

Will keep you all posted though.
xxx

 

[charlotte2010]

i wanted to find out the sex of all 3 of mine,

1st one the hospital didnt allow it but it was such a beautiful surprise in the end

2nd one had its legs crossed but a late scan at 8 1/2 months revealed it was a girl

3rd one the doctor didnt know...?? i really want a boy so to find out its a girl now would mean i would be thinking of another pregnancy to hope to have a boy next time. where as i would be happy and relieved after labour what ever the sex to see a beautiful baby.

i always want to know but the surprise is much better


sign your husbands email up to a 'pregnancy week by week whats happening to baby now'... that way he can read about the baby in his own time. its still quite early days for you