Struggling with a dog and baby

[Pumpkin9]

I feel like we are going two steps forward and one step back all the time.

Basically I have an 8 year old jack russell and an 11 month old son. Most of the time the two exist together with minimal fuss and we even get days where the dog will approach Thomas and make a fuss of him and let him touch him. (The touching appears to be the issue most days we get a fuss being made but touching appears to be a no no)

Other times we get growling and snarling and barking. We seperate them when there is no adult present so they are not left alone but my ultimate aim is that the dog is happy to be around Thomas and not nervous and doesn't display any of these behaviours.

It has been very hard work so far. I love my dog and I'm not giving up on him, but at the same time I want to have a safe environment for my son so I really do need to tackle this behaviour and I'm starting to think that we need expert advice as so far our efforts haven't really achieved what we want.

Does anyone have experience of dog behaviourists?

 

[Les1504]

Hi I can't really relate as my springer spaniel more or less ignores our 2 year old son and I've never heard him bark! I may be wrong but I think Emily0505 has a lot of experience with dogs and I'm sure she could offer more advice! Hope you get it sorted soon hun xx

 

[Pumpkin9]

Thanks Hun, he's a highly strung dog.. Considering his age he's still puppy like in many respects, it's just massively testing my resolve and he moment to the point where I'm thinking why did I do this to myself!! (Dog not baby lol) I know if it couldn't be fixed my parents would have him but I really don't want to do that unless there is no other option. Besides that my parents are babysitting two days a week while I'm at work so either way it needs to be dealt with

 

[Emily0505]

Hi hun!!

I would def get someone is asap to advise you.

Any case involving aggression needs dealing with by a qualified professional so I would check the APBC (Association of Pet Behaviour Councillors) website to find someone in your area.

Most cases of aggression stem from fear so it is likely that your dog is worried by your little one.

Growling is good- never punish growling. A growl is a warning and if listened to means there is no need for your dog to take further eg- snapping or biting.

There are lots of other signals that a dog will give when feeling uncomfortable that involve no active aggression eg- yawning, lip licking, ears back, eyes wide, tense mouth, rolling over to expose belly or even walking away. If you can respond to any of these signs then again there is no need for the dog to show aggression. If you see any of these signs remove your dog from the situation immediately- not in a manner of punishment but as help to escape a scary situation.

Google Kendal Shepperds Canine Ladder of Aggression to familiarise yourself with the signals.

Ensure anybody you get in to help with your dog uses only positive techniques and reward based methods. Any aversive type techniques involving rattle bottles, spraying with water etc could create poor associations and actually make the problem worse.

I hope this little bit of advice helps but def get someone in sooner rather than later. Do not wait until something happens.

Good luck hun.

XX

 

[Pumpkin9]

Thanks Emily. I'll have a look at that website tonight and get in contact with someone. I suppose my main 'concern' is trying to remove my dog from the situation without him seeing it as a punishment. At the moment we are basically having to put him behind a Stairgate that leads upstairs as that's he only place that he is then 'protected' from a Crawling baby.

He does have his very good moments and I make sure I make a massive fuss of him when he's behaving how we would like him to. We'll see I'd love to be in a better situation with this all. I knew it would take some adjusting I just didn't realise it would be this hard

 

[Emily0505]

If he is uncomfortable and worried then being removed from the situation serves as a reward.

Use a happy tone 'come on pup pup' type thing and then you can give a treat or kong with a bit of cream cheese in when he's behind the stair gate to further reinforce good things.

My dogs were all edgy when baby started crawling! It can be quite frightening having this little thing coming at them!!

XX

 

[Pumpkin9]

Thank you. That's really help put my mind at slight ease to that. I had a little cry earlier about it. No one warns you about this when you buy a dog when you're 23!

 

[mellie_88]

I've got to be honest, I think a lot is influenced before you've even had the baby and the moment you bring the babybhomebaby home. I.e some people let their dog have free roam of the house then the moment baby arrives they suddenly confine them to one space. Therefore the dog associates the baby with being shut off.

I'd say at this stage to try and get help even if its just seeing if a vet can help. We've been very fortunate with our dog, he seems to like the baby and gets upset if he's crying and tries to come over and help us. Only problem is he's big (staffy/boxer cross) and boisterous and very clumsy, so we never leave them alone together.

I'd definitely start trying to reward all positive behaviour the dog shows. It tends to work better praising good behaviour than punishing the bad behaviour.

 

[Emily0505]

Actually, a very good point raised above- always worth getting a vet to check the dog over. Any underlying illness, injury or pain can affect temperament.

XX

 

[Pumpkin9]

He has regular vet trips so I know there are no underlying health issues and we always praise positive behaviour. In fact we've tried to be 'as normal' as possible so nothing has changed in that respect, it's literally Thomas crawling that is having the impact

 

[mellie_88]

He'd probably just got used to Thomas, and thought he wss just going to be immobile. Then suddenly he's started moving about and he's thinking. What the hell that wasn't the deal! As obviously puppies when they're born are a lot mobile a lot sooner than humans. Fingers crossed he gets used to it soon.

 

[iWitch]

Have you tried giving him something that smells like thomas to sleep with? Not guaranteed to work but they say it's a good idea when you first bring baby home. Even if you did it back then it might help to do it again?

I would imagine he's probably frightened because thomas will be getting bigger than him

 

[Rooster30]

Interesting read as considering getting a dog in the future. However I'm not brave enough to tackle dog and (almost) two children yet. I think we'll be seriously looking into it in about three years when my youngest will have 15 hours free childcare as will have time to give to a dog.

Any good dog breed recommendations? My OH loves Greyhounds and I'd love a Golden Retreiver. We're long way off yet though!

 

[iWitch]

Just make sure you buy a dog from a good breeder or if you rescue then make sure that you get one from a rescue centre that carries out full a assessments properly.

We bought a pup when our lb was 4 months old (collie) & obviously the fact that he was a pup means he's been around him from the start which means we've not encountered these problems but it was hard work! Still we got it out of the way before I went back to work.

 

[Pumpkin9]

Rooster, I think other way round is much easier! We had an established dog and unfortunately he's hsd little contact with small children before this as we don't know anyone with children (none in the family with small kids).

If do your research online first before picking a breed. I think some of the smaller dogs can be more of a problem as they can be snappier and more highly strung but with the right training (I'm laughing at myself now) they can be great pets. I think spaniels and Labradors are good family pets

 

[Pumpkin9]

Iwitch, yeah we did that to start so might be worth another go. It's just all so inconsistent, one minute he's fine licking him and the next there's an issue and Thomas hasn't even touched him.

I think it's because it's got to be in months terms only and Thomas isn't allowed to approach him yet! *sigh* just need to get there quicker as is causing so many difficulties

 

[TaffyRose1]

Hey hun some good advice has been given, I hope you get it sorted. We have 2 big dogs, a Labrador retriever and a Siberian husky and they are amazing with the kids. I think what's always been important is the dogs have somewhere to go away from the kids and Max is not allowed there, he's learnt to give them their space. But to be honest most of the time they want to be around Max and love laying watching him play ugh his trains xxx

 

[Pumpkin9]

Thanks taffy. I think I'm just abit lost with it all, I've emailed a behaviourist now to start the ball rolling as I think I need some tough love from someone and to give me some pointers on how to proceed once they've seen the family dynamic.