so worried

[hennaly]

i have a very big worry, and that is that i may have a boy, i want a girl and the thought of having a boy worries me as i really really dont want one, i know when i have a scan to sex it if they say its a boy i am going to be gutted, i keep telling myslef not to be silly and it really shouldnt matter but it does and i cant get passed this, has anyone else felt this way and what happened when you were told you are having what you dont want.
Sorry if i sound shallow to some of you but i am being honest and i guess my biggest worry is i wont want it.

 

[hennaly]

ok so im guessing nobody else felt like this, now im feeling really crap

 

[aramintalovegrove]

HI I didnt tell anyone on here but my greatest fear was having a girl because of stuff that happened to me as a child, the fear was so bad it was one of the reasons hubby had the snip, even though for generations his side had only reproduced Boys ( I worried so much before I found out what DS was and didnt really want to go through that again).

Well as you can see from my sig the snip didnt work and I had my 20w scan yesterday and im team pink and Im actually quite happy about it. I know it will prob be harder than with my DS but Im actually now looking forward to a DD and seeing lots of stuff I have chosen to oversee in the past (such as pram shoes that Im jelous I cant get in my size )

Your not being sefish, we are programmed to protect ourselves and our LO's and for some of us gender preference is only natural. I dont know your reasons for not wanting a boy but if you need to chat there are a few of tri 2 girls that had isssues and a looong thread about gender preferences.

 

[keelie_b]

I think you'll be suprised. When your having your scan and you see that little tiny person on the screen i think you'll just melt whatever sex. I could be wrong but i think you'll find it hard to be gutted when you see him/her knowing that you've given this little tiny human being life and you are going to look after it and be a fantastic mum to it.
Dont worry about it for now if you can just try and focus on having a happy and healthy pregnancy x

 

[Anna23]

hiya when i had James i was disapointed becasue i wanted a girl first however after time being pregant and knowing i got used to idea having a boy etc... his gender didn't seem to bother me, i thought i'd explain what i wnet through becasue your not alone and if you wanna chat any time just give me a shout

 

[sarah113]

ive never really felt like that, ive said i would like a girl/boy when people have asked me but it has never really bothered me what gender i have, as long as my baby is happy and healthy thats all i really care about

 

[*sara*]

I just hope to have a healthy baby i dont mind what sex he/ she is. xx

 

[babydust]

like someone said before im sure you will change when you see them at the scan.

i have 2 girls so i would like a boy but i have had a few m/c so i really am not picky as long as it survives and is healthy i will be so happy

 

[kellyannlyle]

For a long time I said " I do NOT want a boy... if it is a boy then it needs to stay in there until it is a girl"

I had my 12 weeks scan and now i really don't care!!!

So your mind will change - - - I told people that I would not change my mind and i have!!!

 

[lea m]

After having my 2 boys, I desperately wanted a girl!
OH had had 7 boys in a row before and I seriously thought I would just have boys! i think part of it was to do with the PND I was suffering with at the time but I wouldsee little girls in their dresses and cry!
Then I got pregnant! Obviously the want to have a girl was still strong and I worried that I would be dissapointed that I would be having a boy again! Then as the weeks went by, I realised that I would like a girl yes but it didnt have to be THIS baby! I would love this baby girl or boy! And she happened to be a girl anyways lol but I think your thoughts will change! Mine did by the 12 week scan!

 

[poochielove]

Mines the opposite i dont want a girl. I no i should be happy whatever and i know i will be, but i cant help having a little worry. I think like everyone else says when you se the scan and realise theres a little life there it wont matter.

 

[hennaly]

its good to hear im not comletely alone, i keep imagining it is a little boy and looking at boys things but i just get really panicky almost to the point i wish i wasnt pregnant.
I cant even explain why i feel this way as i already have grown up sons that i adore, i also have 2 daughters so i know what its like having both sexes and i love them all the same so why am i feeling this way.
Oh just one this, this IS going to be the last.

 

[lea m]

You know, I have had irrational fears abut all sorts during this pregnancy and eventually they have wore off, hopefully yours will too! Hopefully it is just your hormones and emotions playing up and the feelings will disappear soon!

 

[Beth88]

Hm, I always said i wanted a girl.. I never ever ever wanted a boy - until two months ago my cousin had a baby boy and i thought he was possibly the best thing EVER and i was totally in love with him, and then i kinda realised that it wouldn't matter what sex the baby was, because it would be cute and small and lovely, and the only difference in the early stages is its genitals, and once you get to love that little newborn, it won't matter what colour clothes you can put him/her in etc

 

[Tiggy26]

i have a very big worry, and that is that i may have a boy, i want a girl and the thought of having a boy worries me as i really really dont want one, i know when i have a scan to sex it if they say its a boy i am going to be gutted, i keep telling myslef not to be silly and it really shouldnt matter but it does and i cant get passed this, has anyone else felt this way and what happened when you were told you are having what you dont want.
Sorry if i sound shallow to some of you but i am being honest and i guess my biggest worry is i wont want it.

Im shocked that you could say such a thing! If your going to be so picky as to what sex you want your baby to be then I dont think your mature enough to be having children. Its one thing saying which gender you would "prefer" but to say that you dont want the baby if its a boy is awful.

All you should be asking for is a happy healthy baby and most mums that are expecting will agree that that is the most important thing.

Im sorry but im just being honest, after all, you knew you would get responces to this post but sometimes its not what you want to hear and I wont beat round the bush and be all nicey nicey after reading something that nearly broke my heart to read.

 

[Bagpuss17]

I couldn't have put it better myself with regard to Keelie_b's reply.

Seeing your own little baby on that screen when you go for a scan will hopefully put your irrational fears to one side.

Boys aren't so bad you know

 

[hennaly]

i have a very big worry, and that is that i may have a boy, i want a girl and the thought of having a boy worries me as i really really dont want one, i know when i have a scan to sex it if they say its a boy i am going to be gutted, i keep telling myslef not to be silly and it really shouldnt matter but it does and i cant get passed this, has anyone else felt this way and what happened when you were told you are having what you dont want.
Sorry if i sound shallow to some of you but i am being honest and i guess my biggest worry is i wont want it.

Im shocked that you could say such a thing! If your going to be so picky as to what sex you want your baby to be then I dont think your mature enough to be having children. Its one thing saying which gender you would "prefer" but to say that you dont want the baby if its a boy is awful.

All you should be asking for is a happy healthy baby and most mums that are expecting will agree that that is the most important thing.

Im sorry but im just being honest, after all, you knew you would get responces to this post but sometimes its not what you want to hear and I wont beat round the bush and be all nicey nicey after reading something that nearly broke my heart to read.

ok there are a few things you seem to have missed here, firstly i wish i didnt feel this way i really do, secondly i already have 6 children, 4 boys and 2 girls and i have never felt this way before wth any of them, i have always thought if it is healthy i dont mind what it is and i love them all the same in fact with the first if i could have chosen the sex i would have chosen a boy.
Im not sure how having a feeling i have no control of makes me imature and yes i knew i would get some people feel this way about me and to be honest i didnt expect anyone to understsnd at all.

 

[Tiggy26]

i have a very big worry, and that is that i may have a boy, i want a girl and the thought of having a boy worries me as i really really dont want one, i know when i have a scan to sex it if they say its a boy i am going to be gutted, i keep telling myslef not to be silly and it really shouldnt matter but it does and i cant get passed this, has anyone else felt this way and what happened when you were told you are having what you dont want.
Sorry if i sound shallow to some of you but i am being honest and i guess my biggest worry is i wont want it.

Im shocked that you could say such a thing! If your going to be so picky as to what sex you want your baby to be then I dont think your mature enough to be having children. Its one thing saying which gender you would "prefer" but to say that you dont want the baby if its a boy is awful.

All you should be asking for is a happy healthy baby and most mums that are expecting will agree that that is the most important thing.

Im sorry but im just being honest, after all, you knew you would get responces to this post but sometimes its not what you want to hear and I wont beat round the bush and be all nicey nicey after reading something that nearly broke my heart to read.

ok there are a few things you seem to have missed here, firstly i wish i didnt feel this way i really do, secondly i already have 6 children, 4 boys and 2 girls and i have never felt this way before wth any of them, i have always thought if it is healthy i dont mind what it is and i love them all the same in fact with the first if i could have chosen the sex i would have chosen a boy.
Im not sure how having a feeling i have no control of makes me imature and yes i knew i would get some people feel this way about me and to be honest i didnt expect anyone to understsnd at all.

Look maybe I havnt been very understanding and I apologise. To be honest it just took me back to the days that me & OH were desperatly trying for a baby and would have done anything for one (we thank our lucky stars) I just got a little upset.

Im sorry you feel this way. Once you have had your gender scan you can take it from there. Maybe your just feeling a little emotional at the moment and have preference to having a lil girl becuase they are easier? I say that because someone said to me that boys are more of a handfull then girls, dont know how true that is?

 

[lea m]

Tiggy26, as far as Im concerned boys are FAR easier
My little girl is a pain in the bum 90% of the time! hee hee

 

[hennaly]

Tiggy i completely understand your response, i feel really guilty feeling this way and am hoping for that sudden rush of 'it doesnt matter what it is'
but i cant get that feeling of panic out my mind.
I did talk to my midwife about it today and she said its probably hormonal and try to put it to the back of my mind.