separation during pregnancy

[Lorrie]

Sorry for my depressing topic at what should be a happy time. I just really neede to share with someone. Feeling really low. Husband & myself havn'e been getting on. I've been suffering from awful sickness & our sex life is non existent. I just feel he's verbally horrible to me all the time & I dont put up with it. With the result that in last few days hes said hes leaving me & e wont discuss it. I have a one year old & I'm trying hard to keep my chin up for him but I'm starting to fall apart. Im terrified the crying & stress will cause me to lose my baby but I just feel so broken herted. Anybody else been thru this could offer some advice please.
Lorrie

 

[Rosebay]

Aw hun I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through a tough time of it. Were things going ok before the pregnancy or is it a case that they've got worse? It's always a difficult time at the beginning because it's a big change for the both of you and of course you've got the physical stuff going on too. Did you have a hard time at the beginning with your first child? Could you persuade him to talk to someone about it- perhaps Relate?

I don't know what else to advise really accept to hang on in there, try to keep talking and perhaps try and get outside agents to help out. If he's making you that stressed though might a small break be helpful for you? Or if you really don't think you want to do that could someone explain to him how difficult it is being pregnant, especially at the beginning?


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[Lorrie]

Hi Rosebay
Thankyou for your kind words.
Things disimproved since we had Jack our first. Weve both been very stressed with trying to hold down jobs & Jack never sleeping. Jack sick a lot on and offin first year.It's been hard. But it hasnt been all bad! I just think he's very immature & hes decided this life is just too tough. Pity he didnt let me know before we planned a second one. He wouldnt talk to anyone very private & proud. Probably best to let him go. Just dont know how I'm gonna cope.
Can I just say sorry I realised after words there is a "Relationship" forum.I should have shared on that. Thanks Rosebay
Lorrie

 

[Babylicious]

Hi hun, firstly to you. I've had similar with my partner Sean but we've not split, come very close to it though. It's not easy, I hope you manage to work things out. I'm lucky that my OH is very tolerant

 

[DebbieM]

I'm so sorry to read this.

I don't know what to say other than perhaps you could try some counselling or something together? It must be hard if Jack is unsettled but you do need alone time too. Maybe someone could have him for a weekend or even a night to give you both some space to talk things through?

I'll keep my fingers crossed it all works out for you both xxx

 

[Lorrie]

Thanks Debbie.
Last few days have been hard but think we've sorted things thank God.
Think we've both just been finding parenthood really hard. Jack never sleeps & of course me being pregnant & sick on top of it all.We've got a few days off work now & we're leavingJack into creche, so we can catch up with each other. Thanks again for listening.Lorrie x

 

[DebbieM]

Hey Lorrie.

I'm so pleased things are working out. It might just all take time so don't expect too much too soon but I feel confident you will all be just fine.

Take care xx

 

[Rosebay]

Hi,

so glad you're managing to work at it together. It's a tough thing parenthood isn't it? Sleep deprivation is not laughing matter either is it? I think it's a really good idea to try and get some more time together.


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[DebbieM]

Hey Lorrie.

I'm so pleased things are working out. It might just all take time so don't expect too much too soon but I feel confident you will all be just fine.

Take care xx

 

[Rosebay]

Hi,

so glad you're managing to work at it together. It's a tough thing parenthood isn't it? Sleep deprivation is not laughing matter either is it? I think it's a really good idea to try and get some more time together.


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[Steelgoddess]

Hon im so sorry you are feeling so pants at this time, its even more stressful going through a breakup when kiddies are involved
.

Maybe give him some time to "go to his cave" and then have a chat with him if possible, maybe whats bothering him is that he needs to work out where he stands and then he will be able to communicate to you.

I really hope things work out, give him time and then try and tackl;e whatever is bugging him, air your views too, tell him you need his support now more then ever!

xx

 

[Steelgoddess]

Thanks Debbie.
Last few days have been hard but think we've sorted things thank God.
Think we've both just been finding parenthood really hard. Jack never sleeps & of course me being pregnant & sick on top of it all.We've got a few days off work now & we're leavingJack into creche, so we can catch up with each other. Thanks again for listening.Lorrie x

Sorry just saw this. Having time for yourselves is REALLY important why not arrange to go out on a "date" arrange a babysitter for the evening and go out for dinner, or to the pictures and then have a drink and catch on on stuff away from your home.

Hope things are going a bit better now

x

 

[muppetmummy]

I'm glad you're working it out. The sleepness nights don't last forever, it will get easier as Jack gets older.