Not TTC anymore :(

[Maximus17]

As you know I had another early mc and we decided not to TTC anymore but I think I am ovulating soon and I found myself desperate to try again but my husband says definitely no so I am so so sad and not sure how to move on. It’s worse around ovulation as my body is saying try again and get pregnant I really need to get on birth control to stop these urges

 

[IVW]

So sorry to hear this Maximus. Time is a healer in every kind, so i think having a break in the first instance is probably the best all round and you never know what might happen in a few months.

I wish you all the best in whatever you and your oh decide >3

 

[Maximus17]

So sorry to hear this Maximus. Time is a healer in every kind, so i think having a break in the first instance is probably the best all round and you never know what might happen in a few months.

I wish you all the best in whatever you and your oh decide >3

Thank you. It’s just so strange not to TTC anymore after 15 cycles. It’s something I got used to do tracking etc. I never thought I would feel sad about it. Like you said anything can change in a few months but I also haven’t got enough time left being 40 and all that. I am sure I will feel different once I get over the ovulation time. I think our bodies want to get pregnant around this time so it’s harder.

 

[princessp]

Whyhave you decided to stop? It is because you can't cope emotionally with another possible miscarriage? If you would really like a baby then I would say keep trying as you wont'regret trying but you may regret not trying?

I don't know your circumstances at all so apologies if I'm missing something or this is not what you need right now.

It must be very hard for you.

 

[IVW]

So sorry to hear this Maximus. Time is a healer in every kind, so i think having a break in the first instance is probably the best all round and you never know what might happen in a few months.

I wish you all the best in whatever you and your oh decide >3

Thank you. It’s just so strange not to TTC anymore after 15 cycles. It’s something I got used to do tracking etc. I never thought I would feel sad about it. Like you said anything can change in a few months but I also haven’t got enough time left being 40 and all that. I am sure I will feel different once I get over the ovulation time. I think our bodies want to get pregnant around this time so it’s harder.

Oh i can imagine, it almost becomes part of life. I think with time your oh will soon come back round to trying again, but i think in the mean time a little break for you, will do you the world of good

 

[Maximus17]

Whyhave you decided to stop? It is because you can't cope emotionally with another possible miscarriage? If you would really like a baby then I would say keep trying as you wont'regret trying but you may regret not trying?

I don't know your circumstances at all so apologies if I'm missing something or this is not what you need right now.

It must be very hard for you.

So many reasons but the main one is how my recent miscarriages affected us and my body. My work suffered from taking so much time , I had an operation and nearly died in the recovery after my first mc also how it affected my daughter as well. we also signed her up for private school as the schools here very bad. We can’t afford 2 children in private school so everything really but my heart says we can make it work even though so many reasons against it. I also had PND after daughter. But of course I just want another baby against all of these things. Crazy isn’t it?

 

[IVW]

Whyhave you decided to stop? It is because you can't cope emotionally with another possible miscarriage? If you would really like a baby then I would say keep trying as you wont'regret trying but you may regret not trying?

I don't know your circumstances at all so apologies if I'm missing something or this is not what you need right now.

It must be very hard for you.

Takes two to tango and if one doesnt want to atm.....

 

[EmmaN27]

Oh Maximus, I'm so sorry. As IVW has said, take a little break for now and things might change in either you end up agreeing with OH about not pursuing it anymore and concentrate on the life you currently have, or you realise how much you want it and manage to get OH on board. I don't blame him and can understand where he is coming from after what happened to you with the first miscarriage, he will be looking at it like your daughter nearly lost her mum and he nearly lost his wife. That's tough, maybe you would both benefit from some counselling? x

 

[Maximus17]

Oh Maximus, I'm so sorry. As IVW has said, take a little break for now and things might change in either you end up agreeing with OH about not pursuing it anymore and concentrate on the life you currently have, or you realise how much you want it and manage to get OH on board. I don't blame him and can understand where he is coming from after what happened to you with the first miscarriage, he will be looking at it like your daughter nearly lost her mum and he nearly lost his wife. That's tough, maybe you would both benefit from some counselling? x

Yes I know. We definitely need a break. It’s just so so sad how circumstances are against it. Especially my age. I wish and wish that I was younger and had lots of time to wait it out. Maybe it’s just wasn’t meant to be...

 

[EmmaN27]

Yeah, age is a problem for us women sadly. I totally understand why you feel so sad, I desperately want a sibling for my daughter and will be so upset if I can't. The only positive way I would be able to look at it, was at least I was lucky enough to have my daughter as some people don't even get to experience that, doesn't mean it makes it any easier giving up on having any more though.

You need to take some 'you' time and get yourself in a good place, make sure you look after yourself and treat yourself to whatever it is you enjoy, you more than deserve it! x

 

[Maximus17]

Yeah, age is a problem for us women sadly. I totally understand why you feel so sad, I desperately want a sibling for my daughter and will be so upset if I can't. The only positive way I would be able to look at it, was at least I was lucky enough to have my daughter as some people don't even get to experience that, doesn't mean it makes it any easier giving up on having any more though.

You need to take some 'you' time and get yourself in a good place, make sure you look after yourself and treat yourself to whatever it is you enjoy, you more than deserve it! x

Thanks. I am trying to exercise and look after myself generally but it does feel like that is it for us. I think you just know when it’s time to stop and move on. I am sure time will heal and yes I am so glad I have a daughter but just doesn’t stop the longing for another baby. I just knew that if I could have 2 than I would be complete. I just don’t feel complete and yes it does make me feel selfish that I want this when some people can’t even have one. It’s the strangest feeling ever. My daughter have no family close by so yes also to give her a sibling. Things might change in a couple of months or not but I need to be ready if they don’t.

 

[EmmaN27]

It’s not selfish at all to want another child. Hopefully after giving it a little time you and OH might be able to revisit the idea. X

 

[Maximus17]

Yes that’s what I am hoping. Yesterday we had friends over for a play date and they had 2 girls very close in age and my daughter actually played with the younger one 2.5 years old and after they left she said I wish I had a little sister , this was the hardest thing to hear ...

 

[Stacey89]

Sorry to hear maximus.. what if you didnt actively try but also didnt go back on birth control. Of in a few months things change you dont want to he right back to sqare one coming off pills ect.
Good luck with whatever happens x

 

[EmmaN27]

x

 

[Quinn1979]

Sorry to hear this maximus. Don’t give up you never know what’s round the corner xxx

 

[Princess81]

Aw hun I am sorry to hear this
I suppose your o/h is fretful to see you this way, feels useless as he can’t do much to help and would be devastated if anything were to happen to you. You both probably need time to re-group after the losses, try to stabilise a bit and then talk some more. Age is definitely something to put the pressure on us, I hope you can decide something that suits you both x