Need a bit of advice please

[scottishterrier]

Im so new around here and kinda feel guilty posting my problems when no one even knows me yet..but

I found out yesterday i am 5 weeks pregnant. My boyfriend(the daddy) and i have only been together for a few months, we don't live together and he works away a fair bit. He's away right now and im actually releaved about that as i am terrified of breaking the news to him.

I have a 5 year old daughter from a previous relationship(infact we are just starting divorce procedure now) and to be pregnant right now was something i definately hadnt planned(infact i was on the pill)

I guess im scared that my boyfriend may think i did it on purpouse, or that he will be so scared he runs, and the thing is he is a great guy and i love him so i may be just building things up worse in my head.

i wont be seeing him for at least another week and i was wondering if anyone has any advice on how i should break the news to him when he's back?

I realise this is a complicated tale but ive tried to simplify it a bit for ease. please help me as im driving myself mad going over the bad things that could happen.

ps do you think it would be wrong to tell my mum before i tell the dad? i just dont think i can go another week with no one knowing.
thanks in advance
S xx

 

[Tiffy]

First of all, if you need to tell someone and you think your mother might have some good advice for you int his situation, dont'hesitate to tell her. I don't think it's wrong for you to do at all - you obviously need some help, and from someone you're close with.

I understand how terrifying it is, but you need to sit him down and explain the situation. If your boyfriend is as good a guy as you believe he is, then I am sure he will understand. No doubt his reactions will be strong, but give it time.

 

[fifi211]

I think you should tell your mum, if you are worried you should have someone to talk to and who's better than your mum.

The situation with your boyfriend could be a case of you building it up too much, but regardless of the outcome he has to know and you said he's a great guy, so hopefully he won't have the reaction you are worrying about. I hope everything works out alright for you

 

[muppetmummy]

Good luck hun, I hope it all works out ok. I'm sure he'll be fine.

 

[NIE]

I'm sure everything will be just fine babes.

I would tell your mum. You need support right now and no one knows you better than your mum.

It is quite a long time before you see you OH, so that gives you time to get used to the idea and also to think of a interesting way to tell him the news.

Let us know how you get on. xxx

 

[UmmAli]

It's a delicate situation, but you shouldn't be scared to tell him... you might be afraid that his reaction will disappoint you but just remember that unplanned pregnancies aren't something "a woman does TO a man", but something a man and a woman do together

Why would he think you did it "on purpose"? I'm sure that if he's the great guy you said he is, he won't accuse you of that.

Unless you plan to decide with the father wether to keep the baby or not, I don't see anything wrong with telling your mother. Especially with him being away you need the support

I don't think there is a better way to tell him. As long as it is face to face. Saying it is gonna make it sound SO REAL (and that's a great feeling I think)... good luck with that and all the best!!!

 

[scottishterrier]

thanks girls, have just found out he is coming to see me mon night so i have only a few more days of worry left lol.
didnt tell my mum as was only going to if he'd be gone for over a week.

xx

 

[helsekia]

good luck im sure all will be fine

 

[Happybunny]

It is probably better to tell him face to face, I hope it all turns out ok

 

[Babylicious]