Kids 12 months apart please help.

[wifeywifey]

I know there is a few of us with kids close in age. Im really not coping and really could do with help on how you cope. Any advice will be great I dont seem to get anytime to myself or away from kids or housework my dh is very helpful but has broke his hand so less use than a choc fireguard at min. Please any advice before I go crazy I cant take this any more.

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[LoopyLouize]

Hey hun,

Sorry im not in the same situation so my input is probably useless but.. How about family members? Could you not ask for help of them in general or just to help more so whilst hubby can't?

X

 

[wifeywifey]

My eldest is at his nannans for a few day and thats the only help I have she lives about an hour away and we dont drive so takes him for a bit over night sometimes this was arranged before oh hurt his hand so I could get a bit of a break but my youngest is having a growth spurt and teething badly so he is very grumpy and demanding. I really dont know how much longer I can do this I dread getting up on a morning my oh says Im doing great but doesnt understand how Im falling apart inside and if I feel like this now surley its only going to get harder before it gets easier. Being a mum is officially the hardest thing iv ever done.

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[Susanne]

I'm not really in the same situation, as my older 2 were 2 and a bit years apart, and this time round there's a huge age gap - but didn't just want to read and run. Sorry you're going through such a difficult stage - hopefully, the teething and growth spurt issues will resolve themselves soon and things will get easier again. Is your LO less grumpy when you take him out? If so, have you tried taking your kids out as much as possible to places that your older one enjoys? I know the weather can put a spanner in the works these days, but I've found in the past that sometimes going out in wellies and raincoats and coming home with soaking wet but happy children was still preferable to going mad in the house... Don't really know what else to suggest, sorry, but hope things will get easier for you soon!

 

[LoopyLouize]

Aww

It is hard! Very hard!

I think the only thing I can say is that it will get better! Maybe not today or tomorrow but eventually they will become easier. The teething will end and then they will just end up entertaining each other so you can relax for a minute

X

 

[wifeywifey]

Thanks for your reply we went to the park 4 days in a week we are out for two hours each time, it makes my eldest easier to cope with but my youngest just screams he hates the buggy which stresses me out loads.

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[wifeywifey]

Aww

It is hard! Very hard!

I think the only thing I can say is that it will get better! Maybe not today or tomorrow but eventually they will become easier. The teething will end and then they will just end up entertaining each other so you can relax for a minute

X

Thanks you made me smile which isnt easy these days.

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[Me, My Girls & I]

How old are they hun? I should be able to suggest some things! But it does get easier, honestly!! Mine are 2 and 3 now and I'm getting there! Still want to bang their heads together lol, but that's the same with any age gap! do you have a sling you can use rather than the pram? Massive xxx

 

[knopk@]

I would suggest a sling (for youngest of course), they like beong snuggled up to you. Hope it gets better soon.

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[wifeywifey]

They are 15 months and 3 months. I bought a mai tai but my lo hates it he screams more in that. Both kids do well at sleeping through the night its day times Im struggling with. How did you keep ur sanity? Honestly is it normal I feel like this, is it as hard as I think or am I feeling worse than I should iykwim?

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[Me, My Girls & I]

Its completely normal hun! It's so hard when they're both so young! Does your oldest like colouring and stuff? I used to let K do a lot of that whilst I was busy with E! Also, when you're feeding baby, having the oldest cuddled up either singing songs or reading helps them feel included! Trying to think back now! Tbh I thjbk cbeebies was my best friend back then also, don't feel bad about leaving one to cry whilst you see to the other! It won't do them any harm, but I remember feeling really bad about it! I'm gonna keep racking my brains and I'll be back!xxx

 

[Me, My Girls & I]

And keeping sanity, I wasn't sane to begin with its a case of prioritising! Don't feel bad if the house isn't perfect, just take each day as it comes and deal with one thing at a time! Even now I have times where I just have to walk out the room, shut the door and count to 10! But it does get easier! It won't be long til they're older and playing together! Mine are the best of friends now and it's lovely!

 

[VikkiR]

Have you thought about the people at home start, they are volunteers that come to your home for a few hours and basically do what you ask them to incl babysitting. Haven't got a link but google the organisation, they may be able to help x

 

[knopk@]

I am sure its no walk in the park, you need help. Can you borrow slings off people to try them?

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[wifeywifey]

Thank you, he loves colouring but still eats the crayons, he isnt jelous or anything but he only has a one hour nap in the morning and gets so tired on an afternoon then he gets mischievous. I end up putting him in his buggy for ten mins all the time so I can pee or make dinner etc which makes me feel horrible I said id never do that but if I dont he will climb on sofa or find a wire to pull or sit on the baby lol. He is a good kid and I know how lucky I am but that just makes me feel worse. I appreciate anything you can suggest and am really grateful for your reply, knowing its normal to feel this way and that I will come out the other side someday certainly helps.

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[wifeywifey]

Thanks all of you, you have made me smile. I will check out home start thanks

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[Hope81]

Obviously not even close to this situation....
Do you have a playpen, toddler pen or whatever it's called so you can safely leave him in there while you are doing other things?
I think kids are getting bored very quick so maybe you buy a bunch of cheap toys and you rotate them? Jigsaws, books, cubes etc and a coupes of times per day you rotate them? Tv of course too can be very helpful.
try to get the bigger one involved more with the younger ones care? Like ask him to get you the diaper, the wipes etc?
As about outside does LO have head control yet? If yes you can try the stiller part instead of the pram so he can see outside?keep try with the mei tai too first in the house and try to have him facing outside so he Dosent get bored maybe?
Maybe schedule the park time around nap time so the younger LO will sleep?
Sorry if those sounds stupid my LO is not even here yet but I wanted to maybe help

 

[Me, My Girls & I]

Don't feel bad about putting him in his pram Hun, I've had to get the baby car seat out recently cos she could climb out the pram! It just gives you 10 mins and gives them a bit of time to chill! E still eats her crayons, but I leave her to it I made them some little maracas as well, just a little pop bottle with lentils in! That kept them entertained! Tbh I ended up giving K fish fingers or something similar for ages cos I couldn't get time to cook! A play pen's a really good idea too!xx

 

[wifeywifey]

Obviously not even close to this situation....
Do you have a playpen, toddler pen or whatever it's called so you can safely leave him in there while you are doing other things?
I think kids are getting bored very quick so maybe you buy a bunch of cheap toys and you rotate them? Jigsaws, books, cubes etc and a coupes of times per day you rotate them? Tv of course too can be very helpful.
try to get the bigger one involved more with the younger ones care? Like ask him to get you the diaper, the wipes etc?
As about outside does LO have head control yet? If yes you can try the stiller part instead of the pram so he can see outside?keep try with the mei tai too first in the house and try to have him facing outside so he Dosent get bored maybe?
Maybe schedule the park time around nap time so the younger LO will sleep?
Sorry if those sounds stupid my LO is not even here yet but I wanted to maybe help

Thats good advise thank you I like the idea about rotating toys, I dont have room for a playpen tho. I have a tandem buggy and youngest cant see anything as he has to be at the back he isnt strong enough fir the front they say 6 months and because of his teeth his maps are all over the place at min. Thank you for the suggestions definatly worth thinking about.

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[LoopyLouize]

Glad your feeling Abit better

How have they been today?

I struggle with one 5 month old so I look at you and think my god! Bloody superwoman!! I'm never going to complain about H playing up again lol!

X