If I Wasn't pregnant...

[Jade89]

Depression is a possibility, but ive never had it myself so coming from someone who has had it: Would you want to work all the time and go out clubbing all the time?

I wish people would listen to me from the start (my brother)...I told him she was bad news, she claimed to have been raped a few years ago then confessed she'd made it all up. Before she got with my brother she pretended to be pregnant a few times too She's so childish! But then again I wouldn't have my wonderful nephew, as least something or should I say someone good has come out of it, just wish he got the attention/care/love etc... he deservs!

 

[Minxy]

Wanting to go clubbing/drinking CAN be a sign of depression as people want to 'forget' what's going on in their life.

I feel sorry for the little one but also his mum, she's still a child in my eyes. No offence Jade, you seem to have your head screwed on, but I tutor a lot of 17 year olds who have similar problems coping with responsibilty. AS do some mums of all ages, I guess.

The girl needs help!

 

[Jade89]

yeah, i agree and i think we all agree she needs help, but it's weather she wants it...

Like I said she takes advice as being lectured and ignores it anyways, but as budge said she just might need a good shock to get her arse in gear!

 

[Lyn_no3]

she actually said she'd been raped and then said she'd made it up

she really does need some sort of help!

depression can do lots of things to you and make you act in really out of character ways but it sounds like she had problems before this thing even started

i hope your brother is takin your advice from now on

 

[Jade89]

Yeah me too, can't put up with anymore physco g/f's of his

 

[loulou1980]

im going to put my two pennerth in now,it does sound like she is depressed,not wanting to face upto responsibility etc.lets remember that depressioncan effect people in many different ways.bottle wise i wouldnt worry,my eldest was a bugger for it as it was comfort i only got rid just before her 3rd birthday.but with the knowledge i now have my other two never had a bottle at all from 10 mths.if she was staying at home not doing anything and slobbing about,she would probably be critisised then,yes i know that shes working all the time and hardly with her child but she will soon realise things and hopefully they willl right themselves,as for the going out bit,family members need to sort it out between them with the babysitting and maybe make sure they limit to saying yes once a week between them.i go out once a week albeit my hubby is at home watching them and no harm has come to them.she will slowly start to realise,she is young,i was young wheni had my eldest but by the time she was 2 i had grew up a lot,it will happen. all you can do is advise and be there to support

 

[Strangeness]

Clubbing and working non stop probably helps her to stay away from her problems of coping but she can't go on like that when she has a one year old at home. I had been through years of depression before I had my son and all you want to do is avoid anything that you think is the problem. My problems were always outside the house so in the end it progressed to social anxiety and I wouldn't leave the house. I would seriously speak to her first hun, just ask her if she's ok? I bet no one has really asked her how she is for ages. Like I said when people don't understand they tend to point out all your bad points and can make it worse. If you ask her and she just brushes you off then yes Social Services need to be involved because that little boy should never suffer no matter how depressed she is. I still have days where I don't want to get out of bed but I have too because of my son and I could never ever just leave him if I ever did I would phone SS on myself because I'd need help.

I just don't like to judge too much because I don't actually know her fully. She could just be selfish but I'd hate to think I totally dismissed someone who could just need help. I really hope you can work it out and get her the help she needs

 

[mummykay]

shes definitely giving teenage mums a bad name

if it is depression then she should get it sorted so her lil man doesnt suffer anymore than he is now.

And good on you Jade, uv got ur head screwed on right and ul b a fab mummy!!

 

[Jade89]

Thanx, I so hope I don't turn out like that and I often worry i'll turn out like her if it is depression what's causing her to be like this, anyone can get depressed, but then again other people here have said they never treated their kids like this depression or not. Ive already told my OH to give me a good hard slapping if I start being like that!

 

[Louise0410]

I thought maybe she was depressed, i was depressed for the first few weeks and it was very hard trying to cope. Mayeb she goes out drinking to try and forget about her depression?
My mum had me when she was 14 and she said it was very hard and had a friend who was 15 with a baby who didnt look after him properly she would leave her baby with his nappy on and just basicaly never looked after him properly and her family call social services and she had her baby taken from her and her baby went to live with her parents who cared for him
my mum couldnt believe how she was treating her son and would never have thought of being like that with me even thogh she was very young

sorry 2 rant on lol

love lou n keryn xxx

 

[cassi]

I have been through depression but i would never treat a child like that...im sorry but depressed or not that poor child dosnt need to suffer!

depression is a horrible powerful thing...but i just think this girl craves attention.

 

[Jade89]

Well I usually go my sister's playgroup today but I can't because ive got to wait in for OH's mobile to be delivered...

She txt me this morning asking me if I would take him playgroup because she doesn't feel very well She must have had a right nasty shock when I said 'No'...

You can't just cart a child, YOUR child off to someone else when you feel ill! I feel like sh*t also, I have 2 weeks left, I feel horrible and fat, my pelvis is about to cave in or so it feels, so I don't feel all that dandy either! Selfish cow, she should take him herself and spend some time with him rather than trying to give him to someone else to look after!

I'd love to take my nephew playgroup, he enjoys it, but i'm not being used like that!

 

[Strangeness]

I have been through depression but i would never treat a child like that...im sorry but depressed or not that poor child dosnt need to suffer!

depression is a horrible powerful thing...but i just think this girl craves attention.

Seen as you have been through depression you will know how awful it is and how it can make you totally different from your usual self. If she's suffering with it then she could do anything and not even see she's doing it. No her son should never suffer but I know what depression can do and I have seen someone neglect her child because of it. It wasn't attention it was severe depression which eventually she got sorted (only after her mother phoned social services about 5 times might I add) and now she's doing brill! She's got a house, a boyfriend, another baby on the way and a gorgeous 4 year old boy who she now realises she treated very badly. She couldn't see through the depression at the time but now she knows what she did and will never forgive herself.

I'm not saying this girl isn't attention seeking because it could be that but if it's depression she probably won't even know what she's doing and she needs lots of support and help. At the end of the day she's still only 17 and has all this responsibility which she can't cope with. I know all the stuff about she should have thought about that before having sex and I agree but I'd always help someone in need especially if it's depression.