How does your baby get to sleep?

[CP]

Hi everyone,
I am looking for advice/help about my LO's sleeping.
My daughter is 15 weeks old and is a nightmare to get to sleep. The only way to get her to sleep is either by walking/rocking/patting or pushing her in the buggy (for about an hour). The problem I am having is that during the day once i have got her to sleep I cannot put her down anywhere because she wakes up EVERY time so unless i keep hold of her while she sleeps she just won't sleep during the day.
I have seen the HV today who said we should start leaving her to cry so she can learn to get herself to sleep - which is really scary and daunting.
Does anyone else have this problem? Are/were your LOs getting themselves to sleep at this age? Has anyone left baby to cry and it has worked?

Thanks in advance for any advice

 

[Manda&Thomas]

i leave my son to cry as it doesnt hurt them and they do learn its sleep time.
we put him down to bed at about half 8 he used to grissle for a little while but by 9 he would be asleep now he goes stright off all that in under 2 weeks.
in the day i put him in his carrycot and he will cry sometimes i make sure he doesnt need anything winding/feeding/changing if hes just crying because hes been put down then i leave him i will offer him his dummy but thats it, that said im not a mean mummy i do cuddle him to sleep sometimes and he does grissle when i put him down but he has learnt its sleep time.
good luck with leaving her if thats what you deside it has worked well with us but then hes alot younger he might change as he gets older
manda xx

 

[NIE]

I just put my son in his sleeping bag and then his cot and jump into my bed next to him and we both fall asleep together.

Most nights he will have a wee moan but usually falls asleep within a few minutes.

Other nights he will scream for what feels like ages and I find it hard not to lift him. We used to co sleep and don't want to send him mixed messages so I only lift him if he crys to tell me there is something wrong. (wind, dirty nappy etc)

It might sound harsh but he is getting bigger and crying wont do him any harm. (within reason) x

 

[Squiglet]

I have to leave lil miss to cry, tbh she gets to the point sometimes, when even cuddling her or carrying her isn't enough, she cries anyway BECAUSE she is tired... but I won't leave her on her own when she's doing it... It feels wrong... so I stay with her...holding her hand, stroking her head...eventually she goes off It can take hours though...and the only real reason I have taken to just putting her down instead of rocking her to sleep is because my back can't take it anymore...

Babies don't know when they are tired...so they need to be instructed and guided in the matter... and at some point tears are involved.

 

[foxred]

at about 6 weeks old I'd had enough of only being able to go to bed when HE decided so we started a bath, feed and bed routine so he was being put down around half seven.

He gets bathed, then fed in a dim nursery and put in his basket with his dummy. I sit on the landing on the computer until he is quiet, popping his dummy back if he is grumping. Used to take an hour, now about 15 minutes

Getting your evenings back saved my sanity - and unfortunatley sometimes especially to start with it involved 10 minutes of grizzling...

 

[Redshoes]

I co-slept with Isaac until he was 5months old, but until I actually went to bed, he would sleep on the sofa at the side of me or on me, he wouldn't go to bed without me. At 5months he decided to accept a dummy and we started leaving him to sleep alone, this worked as long as he was happy, so when he had a cold or teething pains or was just a bit overtired, it meant rocking or holding etc So, I started to lay him on our bed and wait until he fell asleep then left him there and moved him into his cot when I went to bed, that would work most of the time.

I would never leave him to cry, I think that's a personal choice, whether it works or not, all LO's are different anyway, I think some babies will respond to it whilst others won't. If you can try as foxred says and have a routine, that's a great way to go about teaching LO it is bedtime, and take it from there. Very best wishes, it is true that getting back your evenings is VIP, Isaac sleeps 7-7 most nights, waking now and again but he re-settles easily if I go into him, but he's practically 1yr old, I hope you get something sorted soon, very very best wishes

 

[Kimbo]

in my arms rocking her and stroking her eyebrows
or
she falls asleep as soon as i put her on my bed!

 

[Kimbo]

could never leave her to cry
even one tear from her and it breaks my heart

 

[charlie84]

We do bathtime then a feed and a cuddle, then i put her down to sleep in her cot whether she is awake or not. Then i leave the room.
She usually falls asleep within ten mins.
So far had no tears at bedtime
Keeping my fingers crossed it stays this way.

In the day she falls asleep where she wants to, in my arms, on daddy, in her bouncer, on the settee.

She does get grizzly when she is tired but only for a minute then she is out like a light
Again keeping my fingers crossed it stays that way.

 

[CP]

Thanks everyone.

I'm just not sure what to do. she already has a bath,feed,bed routine and knows its bedtime but just cannot EVER sleep without rocking etc.
we really dont want to leave her to cry but not sure we will be able to rock her for much longer. she is a big girl and is nearly 17lbs now!
if we are going to have to leave her to cry eventually is it better to do it now or later?
we did try it once before - going in to her every 2/3 minutes but she was just as upset after half an hour (proper screaming!) so we gave in.
does anyone else have a baby who NEVER has gone to sleep on their own?

Thanks

 

[muppetmummy]

i could never leave either of mine crying, im too much of a wuss
i used to rock james to sleep in his pram, eventually as he got older he learnt to fall asleep by himself naturally. he'd often end up in our bed halfway through the night though until he was about 2. we didnt see it as a big issue though.

I havent tried to put logie to bed early yet, he just goes to bed when i do anytime between 10.30pm and midnight. im not a fan of strict routines for babies, they're not babies for long.
my own personal view is that after being in a warm cosy womb for 9 months they need time to adapt to being outside and need to be close to their mother. everyone has different thoughts on this though.

i was always quite soft on james too routine wise and it hasnt done him any harm, he's grown up to be very polite and well behaved.

i say if you dont like leaving her to cry dont do it

eta: i did sometimes leave james to cry for a few mins as a toddler when he'd been especially naughty and had been sent to his room, bur never a a baby for finding it hard to sleep alone

 

[chickadee1976]

Thanks everyone.

I'm just not sure what to do. she already has a bath,feed,bed routine and knows its bedtime but just cannot EVER sleep without rocking etc.
we really dont want to leave her to cry but not sure we will be able to rock her for much longer. she is a big girl and is nearly 17lbs now!
if we are going to have to leave her to cry eventually is it better to do it now or later?
we did try it once before - going in to her every 2/3 minutes but she was just as upset after half an hour (proper screaming!) so we gave in.
does anyone else have a baby who NEVER has gone to sleep on their own?

Thanks

Have you thought of puuting her inthe cot but staying with hermaybe just lying on the bed stroking her hand.

This way she is still getting physical contact from you but in a calmer way and where you want her to end up. ie in her cot.

If this works you could gradually move out the room.

 

[rusks]

luke has always gone to sleep with a lullabye and he cuddles his muslin cloth, he still has this routine to this day. luke tended to cry if we were in the room but more or less as soon as we left him he cuddled in and went to sleep. i knoww your LO is still young though, to be honest i have forgotten what i did when he was that small.

 

[purple13]

can you not just sling her and let her sleep whilst you get on with things? itt works for me & connor and i get all the housework done this way. i could never leave him to cry as he only does it when something's wrong - and that includes being left alone - he's a very clingy baby and i'm happy to be clung too (he'll be a teenager and hating me soon enough!)

 

[CP]

Thank you for all your views and ideas.

I really wouldnt mind rocking her and holding her all the time but it doesnt really help much. even if i pick her up when she is tired and cries she carries on crying - i then rock/pat and talk to her until she calms down then i rock her to sleep. She cries when i lay her in my arms to get her to sleep even though its obvious she is tired because her eyes are heavy and she is constantly rubbing them.
do you think this is just because she has not learnt that she is tired so is just fighting it?

 

[purple13]

she probably just doesn't want to miss out on anything - too nosy and curious for her own good !

when connor's like that, i put him in my baby bjorn facing forwards (he's got v good head control) - that way he can see the world, but will invariably fall asleep and i can carry on doing what i want

 

[Redshoes]

I think sometimes when they get so upset they become overly tired, which is similar to not being tired in that they just find it hard then to wind down and go to sleep

http://www.babycentre.co.uk/baby/sleep/

 

[CP]

Thank you redshoes. That website was really interesting.

 

[perrywestley]

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[CamFi]

doh, just realised this was an ancient thread