How did you approach OH tests

[positivity :)]

Hi ladies

when i went to my doctor a few weeks back for some general advice she told me to go back in the new year if we have not yet conceived and she will refer us for further testing and ivf.

as ttc has been on hold i have decided i will probably more likely do this in feb/march however, she did say, in the meantime (i.e. now) get OH to go in and do a sperm test.

with regards to ttc, my OH doesn't really have much to do with it except for bd when i tell him to lol! i have purposely done this so that he doesn't worry or stress about it. i don't even tell him when i'm testing or af has arrived, he will only hear when it's a BFP. as a result i feel really uncomfortable asking him to go and do the tests, i feel like it's making a big deal out of it if i do that. how did your OH's react when you asked them and any tips on how i can put it to him?? xx

 

[LouiseB]

I basically played it down and made it sound like a normal thing to happen when people are ttc and he'd be my hero.

I think the conversation went something like:
"I was thinking that maybe you should go to the doctors?"
"Why?"
"Well, i'm bummed out about us not getting pregnant and it just makes sense to get testing but they won't do me until they have done you."
"Why?"
"You will only need one test to tell them everything they need to know and i'll have to have several. If you have problem then the solution will be pretty straight forward but it could take months to fix me."
"Umm, ok."
"I'm sure you'll be fine but it's just another box ticked."
"Ok."

I don't tell my husband anything more than he needs to know about the situation, but he trusts my judgement. I was surprised how accepting he was about the whole thing honestly, i thoguht he was going to show at least some resistance

 

[positivity :)]

thanks louise, i like the 'they need to see you first' bit he would def buy that, good idea! its so hard to get it right isn't it. xx

 

[LouiseB]

Yeah, it is hard without making itt sound like you are assuming it must be him.

I wonder sometimes if we both had an inkling he'd have an issue as he does suffer from his diabetes.

He had a small lump in his neck, just a gland, but they said it might get bigger and it might become visible so to remove it.

Now he has this gigantic scar across his neck. He went in again to have his scar corrected but it just healed even worse It's all red and raised and about 5 inches long...

Maybe your husband has been worrying about it in secret and will be glad to find out for sure

 

[maybe baby]

Well you could also tell a little whit lie that it takes 4 weeks to get the results and they close for 3 weeks over Xmas so would be best to do it sooner so you get the results before Xmas.

Good Luck!

xx

 

[positivity :)]

yeah i could do that, he will buy anything i say!

louise i had an op on my neck a year ago but scar healed nicely, ur poor hubby!!

my OH isn't actually my husband - we are 7 years together and living in sin lol! xx

 

[LouiseB]

I just assume everyone is married - see no evil