hi, could anyone help. advice needed.

[Laura_James&Amber]

hello every one me and my fiancee laura are new to this site and we are having our first baby. laura is nearly 6 weeks pregnant and she has explained to me some fears she has about being a mother. one of the fears is thinking she might be a bad mother, and another one is that she fears she may not take to motherhood or the baby and the baby might not like her. i have tried to reasure her but she is still not convinced these feelings are normal. could anybody offer some reasuring advice. thank you. tc,

james.

 

[dannii87]

It's very early on so try to reassure her that her feeings will grow with the baby. She'll become protective, excited at the different stages she goes through and once she starts growing, it'll all become more real.

I'm expecting my first AND going to be a single parent so I went through all this too, until my body started changing with being pregnant. At about 6 weeks my breasts were really sore and I felt little twinges and everything suddenly became more real!

Any time someone suggested that perhaps due to my situation I should have an abortion, I became really protective because I had to speak on behalf of my baby and say no, and that I loved him/her already.

I would personally suggest for her to start posting on the forum, she'll soon feel comfortable with the fact that all the worries and fears she is experiencing are nothing to worry about as she'll be able to relate to so many other feelings that she might not consciously know she's feeling. Like excitement to hit the stages!

Please assure her that she's not alone. This is something that I'm sure many first time mum's feel, but remember, she has got a long and exciting 9 months ahead of her for her feelings and worries to balance out properly

Send her my love and let her know that as soon as she feels ready to join herself, we'll all be here to reassure and help her with her fears

xxx

 

[Bagpuss17]

Hi,

Welcome to the site and congratulations to you both on the pregnancy.

I think these feelings are completely normal. You get swept up in the excitement of pregnancy and then have moments were you stop and think about what the future holds and all these thoughts that your fiancee is having come to the fore.

It's daunting to think that in a few months you will have another little person to care for but trust me, the baby will bring you so much joy. You'll both step up to the demands of parenthood doing the very best you can for your LO.

There's always plenty of support on here for you both

 

[Geordie&Bairn]

Tell Laura big hugs from me

The fact she is concerned shows she cares and wants to be a good Mam
It natural to worry a bit motherhood is a huge thing
but a wonderful one at that
Get Laura on to the forum she will see she is not alone
we all have concerns and fears and we share them on hear
It's helped me so much to have some where to air my worries and the girls are fab at giving advice

everone has these fears once in a while this will be my first too
I was petrified that i will not be a good enough mum will my baby love me???
But the further along in my pregnancy seeing my bump grow, feeling the kicks ,seeing my baby on the scan ect ect
I feel a connection with my Son and i love my Son more then anything on this world
And will do anything to be the best MAM i can be

And i am sure that Laura will be a loving caring Mummy to your child

It's lovley you have posted on her behalf for advice it show you to be a caring partner and Daddy to be

 

[Laura_James&Amber]

thanks for the kind replys. laura has read them and feels reasured. she has gone to bed now as she has been feeling very tired but she will post on here tomorow. its good to know we can seek advice on here as this is our first baby and we have quite a bit to learn. thanks again,

james.

 

[dannii87]

Hello again you three!

I'm having my first and went through similar worries so if you need anything, just ask

We're all very supportive of each other on here and become a little family. It might be nice to post your EDD (expected due date), even if not confirmed yet. If you contact babydust she'll amend her post and add you on. "due date thread" here in First Tri

It's handy because you'll see who is at the same stage as you, and when you both move into Second Tri, you'll have EDD buddies who will move with you!

It's also nice to read posts from other women who will be experiencing similar things.

James, there is also a Dad area on the forum so if you need any support for yourself, it might be nice to try it in there!

Hope everything is ok and Laura managed to get some sleep! xx

 

[Charlie:-)]

Hi there,

I think what everyone else has said is true about having doubts in our own ability and your Gf is probably feeling quite scared at the thought of being a mother............It is after all a huge responsibility.

One thing that helped me was a book by Jo Frost (supernanny) called Confident Baby Care.

I have only read the first section of the book because its split into sections based on how old your baby is. I haven't had my baby yet so I have just read the bit on pregnancy and about what to expect in the first few months of baby's life. The book really reassures you on the decisions we make as parents and has made me much more confident about looking after another wee person.

 

[Laura_James&Amber]

hi again, thanks for all the great advice and support everyone, we really do appreciate it. our due date is the 1st october. laura slept well and is very tired again tonight but thats to be expected. i'm going to have a look at the fathers section. laura will be posting on here very soon. tc all.

james.

 

[Laura_James&Amber]

Hi, this is laura. i just wanted to say thankyou for all the advice and support, its so great to know that my feelings are normal. Is anyone suffering with morning sickness? i have it quite bad but have found ginger biscuits help. not sure why but they do! hope everyone is ok and not too tired!

 

[Mildly]

Congratulations Laura and James

I think it is natural to have these thoughts. Wishing you both a happy and healthy 9 months