HELP ME!!

[pollypocket]

Hi everyone,

heres the deal. my ex-boyfriend & i were trying for a baby before we split up (obviously weren't ready anyway) but since we split I havent had a period. im about 4 days late & have all the symptoms i had when i was preg before but had an early m/c. he knows about me being late as he is still friends with me & once said if we ever had a kid together he would try his best to take it away (even though ive heard if you werent married there isnt much a father can do to get the child if the mother is fit enough to look after it). he is a psychopath & twists everything i say, lies a hell of a lot too.

about my symptoms - headache everyday which wont go since i was due on/lightheaded like im gonna faint, tiny stomach cramps, bowel movements have changed, feeling v.sick but havent puked...yet, boobs too sore to even walk & rock hard which dont get like this til my period has come. i have been checking my cervix a bit recently as i was a bit worried. it was low & hard last few days & i thought i was gonna come on but today its disappeared so high i can hardly reach it & is soft.....now im crapping myself! i mean i dont believe in abortion & would hate to go through that alone as the ex is so mean. hes been shouting at me non stop saying i would ruin his life if i kept it. he knows how upset i was about the m/c & has been going on and on at me without a thought for what i feel.

just wondered what you all thought of the situation. im pretty positive i am. going to buy a test today but think i know what the result would be - i knew last time i was preg & this is exactly the same. but if i am what do i do!?

Thanks
Jenny x

 

[babyt]

So sorry for you situation hun but no-one can tell you what to do, it always has to be your choice. If it turns out to be negative then problem solved I guess but it sounds like you know your body and what the result will be. All I can say is do whats right for you, if you want the baby keep it. I've not really had any experiences with custody courts but I have heard that the mother is generally favored and in any case he would need to prove his paternity. Have you got any close friends or family that could advise at all? Maybe those who know your ex a little better. I hope things do work out for you. Let me know what the result is and what you decide - private message me if that would make you feel better. Be thinking of you

 

[Sherry]

Hey there ,
Men can be such w*****s cant they? If it would ruin his life you having his baby then why on earth would he want custody of it? As for the courts then I doubt he would even come close to getting custody. As you arent together or married then you dont even have to put him on the birth certificate. So if he wanted access he would have to pay and prove he is the Father
You have probably done your test now and either way I hope you got the result you wanted. No one but you can decide what to do, family and friends will give their opinions but dont let them make the final decision for you.
Sorry its not great advice.
Take care
Sherry xx

 

[Steelgoddess]

I think the first step is taking the test just so you know.

Secondly If you are you should consider what your options are with regards to this guy being in the bubs life YOU call the shots not him...

Lots of Mums raise babys on their own, my friend does and her baby is lovely so please don't be afraid of that being an option if that is the case.

Don't ever allow someone especially a man bully you tell someone what is going on a close friend or a member of your fam so you have an extra support network...

I hope you get the result you want

x

 

[lillou]

 

[pollypocket]

BFN twice. phew. i am relieved! thanks for your responses, you helped a great deal with my state of mind before i tested!!
x