Help - feeding problems - I'm so upset - updated

[Fiona]

For the last fews days I have had problems when feeding Grace.

She starts feeding, takes a couple of sucks (I am BF) and then starts crying really loudly and gets quite stressed , then calms down and then sucks some more, then cries again, and so it goes on......

but she never does it at her night feeds........ then she feeds wonderfully...

but during the day it is getting worse and it reall upsets me because she is getting upset. Sometimes she is on and off the breast 8 - 10 times.

I did wonder if it was wind but she as it happens right at the beginning I have kind of ruled this out - and she always does a good burp half way through feeding.

anyone got any ideas.......... I am feeling pretty desperate

 

[sam96031]

i know everybody says BF is best but have you mentioned it to the MW or HV maybe you could use a bottle in the day and BF for the night feeds? sorry if crap advice i only bottle fed emma. hope it works out well for you soon

 

[rusks]

i'm no expert on breast feeding hunny just wanted to send hugs

?? maybe she having a growth spurt and getting frustrated or i know at the moment luke is a bit fussy cos i think he is teething and he has had similar incidents on the bottle when i feed him cos i think he is hungry but he doesn't really want it he just wants to suck something.

try pm ing budge or tasha they are good sources of support for BFing amongst others these are the 2 that come to mind, good luck xx

 

[Tasha20]

Aww hunny !!

This is perfectly normal please dont give up! I am sorry but giving a bottle of formula will not stop what is happeing.

Olivia went thru something very similar, especialy evenings she would come on and off and crying, arching her back it was very distressing.

She was having a growth spurt, its frustration aswell as her teeth moving down, this is a big time in her life for changing.

Please please hun you will get thru this, just give her to OH for an hour and then try again, I found that to work well so I was calm and so was she and we tried again.

It doesnt last hun and you will soon be both pro breasfeeders!

 

[Tasha20]

Oh forgot to say, please feel free to pm me hun if you need any help, also if you have a NCT near by ( ask HV) they are great and will give you 100% support with Bfing, HVs dont always know what they are talking about.

 

[angela-]

aww chick it sounds just like me and Niamh! i nearly gave up so many times but just kept trying i am still breast feeding now and she is nearly 10 months! i only have one working boob too
i did give niamh one bottle sometimes when she was about three months and she would always lach on ok the next feed the midwife mentioned it as we where both really upset and drained. if you dont want to do this you could try cup feeding her (only the size of a bottle lid.) they just lap it up so they are not confused by a teet i got mine from the midwifes and used sma gold. as i could'nt expess. it was not all the time just the odd time. try not to worry just hang on there. hope this helps

 

[SarahB]

You're doing a geat job hun. This is just a phase and won't last for long, keep at it and try to stay calm and relaxed yourself, that way baby won't pick up on any stress you might be feeling. I would advise against giving formula as chances are this is a growth spurt and your body needs to know this to keep up with the demand.
You can PM me too if you need to chat.

You WILL get through this

 

[gingerpig]

Ooooooo sounds like she could be fussing until you get your let-down. When it comes through she is then totally happy. Are you getting let-down sensation just before she stops fussing? Or it could be that your flow is really fast and it takes her a little while to get used to it. If she is coughing/gagging it will be the 2nd and she will get used to it. You can use nipple shields to slow the flow or try leaning back as that helps also if you feel that's the case. I certainly found that was the case with Debs. Plus she's also really distracted so will go on and off the booby loads of times in one feed. Please dont worry about it, it's totally normal and doesn't mean she's not getting enough to eat. Debs is much easier to feed at night too.

 

[budge]

around the 3 month age they do start fussing at the breast. maybe its not coming out fast enough or something. awkward litle things babies are you know.
does she do this crying lark on both breasts or one? if its one then maybe the milk flow isn't as fast and she gets frustrated. They do get a preference for a certain breast sometimes. Try changing positions or taking her off the breast a while then trying her again when shes calmed down.
Maybe shes not wanting the breast maybe she just wants a cuddle and a pat on the bum to sleep .

??? im thinking out loud here trying to help you.

Remeber that you're doing the best thing for you're baby and you're doing great. Just keep up the breastfeeding and avoid introducing a bottle at any stage yet.

 

[Tasha20]

Budge Oli does that now, she makes out she wants boob and it ends up she just wants to be patted on the bum


Fiona how is it going hun ?

 

[Urchin]

aw hope she settles down again soon.
it could well be a growth spurt.
Also Brody used to get really distracted at this age, it's the time when they realise there is a big world out there and they might be hungry but they also want to see what all the racket is about Try feeding in a quiet place or draping a muslin over the side of her face while she feeds to stop her getting distracted.

 

[cloud9]

Dylan does this sometimes..I find i have to calm him down then start feeding him again..I am not sure for you but it seems he is hungry and frustrated he doesn't get immediate satisfaction.

 

[Fiona]

thanks for all the replies girls.............

it is still happening............

I am finding is so distressing - never mind how Grace feels

She starts to feed, then starts to cry, then calms own within seconds, then starts to feed again, and so it goes on......... what I am doing now is stopping feeding her, give her a cuddle for a wee while and then try again. This afternoon this didn't work - I am sure she was hungry because she had gone 4 hours since her last feed.
This evening she started crying again so I stooped feeding her and we chatted for a while and had a cuddle and then she had a lovely feed.

The thing is when she cries it is that real heart wrenching cry, not one of frustration but one of real unhappiness. it makes me feel so sad.
I am determined not to give up fb - just wish I knew how I could make things better

 

[Tasha20]

I started to give Olivia baby rice at around 3 months because she was not satisfied with just breastmilk, and this was after a growth spurt.

I really do think Grace is having a growth spurt.

Another thing I have just thought about is that she could have thrush maybe? she may have a sore mouth which is why she is latching on and off?

Has she got a white mouth upto an 1 later after a feed?

 

[gingerpig]

Just wanted to say Debs does this sometimes now because she is so easily distracted. Also if she is really enjoying herself doing something but know she is hungry she can be really difficult to feed. We took her to tinytalk the other day and she loved it, she was all smiles But then she got hungry and I could NOT feed her. She feed for 2 sucks, twist around and howl. Then she would get hungry again feed for 2 sucks, twist and howl. In the end I gave up and left it until we got home where she latched on straight away As Urchin says when they get a bit older they can be so easily distracted but then they get even more hungry so get really grumpy lol.

 

[paulaws]

Hi Fiona,
I have had the same problem with Euan over the last few days but he is also very distressed when he wakes up sometimes If it is any consolation I have been doing the same thing as you just calming him down each time he works himself up. Euan is also not taking all of his bottles and can take anything up to 1 and a half hours to feed. Don't really have any suggestions for you- just wanted you to know you weren't alone.
Paula.x

P.S Euan is formula fed so I don't think it has anything to do with breast feeding or not.

 

[jennywren]

oran is ob bottle now and he does this on his late afternoon bottle every time for the past 4/5 days and occassionally his evening one. Im sure (for him anyway) he is tired and wants to sleep but is hungry at the same time, but Im starting to think he may be teething as well as he bites down on my finger, his dummy and some times the teat, keeps randomly running a temp, cries for no apparantl reason (ie to be changed, fed cuddled etc) and has runny poop