gutted, totally gutted!

[kirlou]

I actaully feel heartbroken!

Just got back from my latest dr appointment (had a good old moan to the practice manager about our traetment by drs so far) and we saw the practice manager who was really lovely and so understanding, but as nice as she was she broke heart!
She said that there is a chance albeit very small that our son was a fluke.
She double checked my bloods and they were fine and is arranging my oh tests but the next thing she said actually had me choking back tears, she said they can give me all the tests but if anything comes up i cant have any traetment not even drugs cos my son was concieved natrually! She then asked if we had thought about fostering. I was lost for words and tbh i still am.

I feel so awful that i feel this way as i know there are so many couples with no children that need the funding for thr treatments but that doesnt stop it from hurting! I know i should be greatful that i have my son and dont get me wrong i love him with all my heart but i dont feel complete with only one child and i dont feel like i will ever be the person that i am meant to be until i have a daughter, I know that some of you might think me ungreatful but i really cannot explain what having a baby girl means to me.

Im sorry to go on i just dont feel like i can keep going now, I actually want to curl in a ball and sob until i cant sob anymore and until there are no tears left.

 

[NinjaKitty]

Oh I am so sorry to hear that. Actually I'm fuming

I'm sure the practice manager was very nice but I think it was insensitive of her to suggest fostering, certainly at this stage when you haven't even had all the tests. As for her speculation about your naturally conceived child being a fluke...... well is the practice manager a doctor too, i.e. qualified to give such an opinion????? I find it un-professional to say the least.

You should at least have ALL the tests before someone takes out your heart and stomps on it grrrrrrrr.

AND even if you have the tests and they do find something then there are all sorts of options you can explore. OK you may not get funding for extra help but there are plenty options along the way some of which don't cost the earth etc.

I say use your practice for as many tests as possible then you actually know where you stand. You can then tell them to stuff it up there own when you go and find your own solution.

stay positive hun, it will happen keep the faith and stay strong.

 

[kirlou]

thank you, i was just so lost for words that it wasnt until i got out that i was like wtf!? ive only just had my bloods done why would i have been looking into fostering already!

 

[maybe baby]

Sorry to hear this Hun,

Try not to get too upset, is there any other options you could look at, would you dare to try Clomid yourself? You can get it online, one of my friends took some that belonged to another friend and got preggers?

What about IVF, you can get it for about £500 privately if you donate eggs £3000 if you don't.

Hope you get your little girl dream, don't give up hope I'm sure it can happen somehow.

xx

 

[Doodles]

oh hun your not ungrateful and if you are then, well, so are a lot of the rest of us I haven't got any words of wisdom or any that will be particularly comforting for that matter, but I just want to say you are more than welcome to vent to me. I've had all the "at least you've got one" comments that have quite frankly thrown me into a rage and resulted in me telling them how condesending they are (even though they actually mean well) so have some idea what your going through (though obviously every situation is different) x x

 

[smokey08]

Oh my god my sweetness!!

can you not go above their heads with complaints??? How can they ask you have you thought of fostering before they have done all the tests???

and to say your son was a fluke!!! WTF???

oh huni my heart goes out to you, i would definatly be looking to take thing further, seems they have no compassion!

 

[NinjaKitty]

What about IVF, you can get it for about £500 privately if you donate eggs £3000 if you don't.xx

This is what a friend of mine did. However you've not even got past the tests yet so just push push push for them.

 

[kirlou]

They did say I can have all the tests so will deffo have them done but just can't fix anything that might come up! I'm just worried cos I had a really bad time with loads of problems brought on by drs when I had my son and I just don't wanna find out its their fault but they cany fix it! I really just don't know what to say or do atm, I have been avoiding my husband all day cos just to look at him makes me want to cry, reading your replys made me cry, its so nice to know that I have you all behind me. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart, sorry soppy mode hehe x

 

[1986princess]

so sorry to hear this and how dare they say that at only blood checking stage??? iv found myself that there isnt much bedside manner anymore! think you should definately take things furthur, and hope and pray that you prove them wrong!!!

 

[NinjaKitty]

So angry I ranted at DH about when I was making tea. Even he agrees that they were out of order saying that to you.

AND AND AND if it does turn out that something happened that was preventable when you had your little boy that was caused by the medical professionals then you should seek some form of compensation.

 

[kirlou]

If it was down to them then there will be hell to pay! They won't know what's hit them I can promise you that! Thanks ladies x

 

[Olive]

Sorry to hear this so unfair xx

 

[Emmamb]

Just to give you a bit of hope-my sister in law has a 8 year old daughter and her and her partner have been tring for another baby for 6 years (the whole time ive known them) she announced a fortnight ag that she is 12 weeks pregnant!! They didnt have any tests done cos like you they knew they wouldnt get any help due to conceiving naturally before xxxx

 

[kirlou]

Thanks everyone, feeling slighty better today, only slightly mind x

 

[maybe baby]

Glad you are feeling a bit better, have you thought about trying alternative therapies like reflexology or acupuncture?

Just a thought..

xx

 

[star fish]

Wow, Kirlou, I'm so so sorry hunny, and tbh I would look at moving to a different practice. That said I really dont think you should give up in any way ttc naturally. So your son was a fluke? Well maybe you will have another one? Maybe the two of you work well together and it overcomes what ever problems you have? I really would just double your efforts at home, you know it can be done! continue to think positive and have lots and lots of from me xxx

 

[kirlou]

Thank you, I've only just moved drs too, my last 1 was crappy too. I think that a big part of our problem at the moment is that we have both become so bored if bd, it has just become about making a baby and its like we are stuck in this run and just can't get out! X

 

[kirlou]

Glad you are feeling a bit better, have you thought about trying alternative therapies like reflexology or acupuncture?

Just a thought..

xx

When I get home later this is exactly what I was going to start looking into. I looked at the clomid a bit last night but I'm a bit worried about buying it online tbh but I am not ruling it out cos I know if things carry on the way they are then ill start to get desperate!

 

[Esperanza84]

I actaully feel heartbroken!

Just got back from my latest dr appointment (had a good old moan to the practice manager about our traetment by drs so far) and we saw the practice manager who was really lovely and so understanding, but as nice as she was she broke heart!
She said that there is a chance albeit very small that our son was a fluke.
She double checked my bloods and they were fine and is arranging my oh tests but the next thing she said actually had me choking back tears, she said they can give me all the tests but if anything comes up i cant have any traetment not even drugs cos my son was concieved natrually! She then asked if we had thought about fostering. I was lost for words and tbh i still am.

I feel so awful that i feel this way as i know there are so many couples with no children that need the funding for thr treatments but that doesnt stop it from hurting! I know i should be greatful that i have my son and dont get me wrong i love him with all my heart but i dont feel complete with only one child and i dont feel like i will ever be the person that i am meant to be until i have a daughter, I know that some of you might think me ungreatful but i really cannot explain what having a baby girl means to me.

Im sorry to go on i just dont feel like i can keep going now, I actually want to curl in a ball and sob until i cant sob anymore and until there are no tears left.

So sorry to hear that kirlou!!! THat you can't get funding sounds really unfair!!!! Hope it sorts out for you!!

xx

 

[kirlou]

thank you x