FOR THOSE WITH PND

[1sttimemum]

If you dont mind me asking what did you score on the edinburgh test?

Edited to say: I was just wondering as my HV thinks i may have a mild case of this due to anxiety issues. I scored 17

Thank you

 

[Snuggle]

I scored 21

 

[soverign]

22.

 

[Sherlock]

18

It was our 6 week check up today. We had a long talk about things so she knew before I even answered it what was coming. My HV said she was expecting it to be quite a lot higher what with all my health problems and demanding baby.

Apparently anything over 13 is considered a PND score, but obviously lower numbers mean less severe. HV said some women clock up 30 plus on the thing

 

[Teej]

25
I've been really struggling and just crying all the time. Its a big shock to feel like this after wanting this baby for so long. Starting on medication in the next few days i think, anyone else been prescribed anything?

 

[1sttimemum]

im going seeing my doc on tuesday with a view to discussing the next step. i had counselling when i was pregnant due to prenatal depression and it wasnt for me.

 

[kellysomer]

I scored 22 at my worst now its about 19. It is out of 30 so that would be the max you can score.

 

[debecca]

I haven't done it yet as they only give you the questionnaire at 3 months here. However as I've been feeling bl**dy awful I found it on the web - 22

Well no surprises there... there is NO WAY I'm going on ADs though

 

[Sherlock]

25
I've been really struggling and just crying all the time. Its a big shock to feel like this after wanting this baby for so long. Starting on medication in the next few days i think, anyone else been prescribed anything?

Sorry to hear you are having such a tough time

Not been prescribed anything. Would not take it if I was. Just not the sort of thing I feel comfortable doing.

After a long talk with my HV yesterday we have a sort of step by step for me to try. OH helping with it also. First step is getting more on top of my medical conditions atm. Next is to be able to actually attend the HV clinic next Wednesday to meet other Mums and babies. Knowing my HV will be there and that loos are across the hall is a big plus point for me Atm I am planning every trip out round public loos and so on. Its miserable. So I don't really go anywhere.

But HV and OH are putting a support network in place and are helping to try to resolve the issues that are causing me to suffer PND. Baby matters are also getting support and I'm doing much better with feeding and demanding baby now too

Have you had the medication side of things explained to you? Are you comfortable taking them? Or do you feel you'd like to try a more hands on approach before taking meds? Trying to implement some changes to help you feel better, that sort of thing? Not saying don't take the meds if its what you want, but maybe there are positive steps you can take without them is all. Worth looking in to maybe?

And fwiw my HV said that its generally felt that the best form of treatment for PND is trying to stop the isolation, having more support and being able to talk about your problems. Also some time away from baby if it can be arranged.

I'm having a home start volunteer come in to see me. Another parent who will just offer help with whatever (within reason) be it to sit with Galen while I go nap or do some housework, or to talk to me and go out for an hour somewhere so I have company. That sort of thing.

 

[soverign]

I don't go out what so ever any more. I only go out when I am forced to eg, for baby things or checkups or electric and gas. I just don't feel like going out. I don't feel like calling any of my friends for a chat either.

I have been like this since I was about 33 weeks pregnant. It all started because I wasn't allowed to go out and I was in hospital alot before my LO was born. When I was finally allowed to it didn't feel right.

I should probably go to mother and baby groups and things but I just don't feel like I want to. I love my son to bits. He is all that matters to me at the moment. I don't care about anything else.

I also feel like I am a waste of other peoples time. My health visitor wont even turn up. My GP's receptionist has even tried to arrange for the health visitor to come and it still doesn't make any difference.

I have alot of issues with my body at the moment, and fear that my partner will leave me.

When ever I post something on this forum I just feel like people are probably thinking that I'm such an idiot! I don't have any other form of communication with the world at the moment, I live here! I'm so sad! If it wern't for this forum when I was pregnant I would have probably being sectioned or something.

 

[debecca]

sovereign, I've never thought you were daft and I really feel for you in the situation you're in now

I feel really awful too but find that getting out and about really helps - whether it's the fresh air or the fact I'm not cooped up all day with a screaming Flod, who knows? But it does seem to help.

Have you thought about making an appointment to go and see your GP to discuss things?

 

[soverign]

sovereign, I've never thought you were daft and I really feel for you in the situation you're in now

I feel really awful too but find that getting out and about really helps - whether it's the fresh air or the fact I'm not cooped up all day with a screaming Flod, who knows? But it does seem to help.

Have you thought about making an appointment to go and see your GP to discuss things?

Hey hun thankyou for your reply. I have thought about going to speak with my GP, just trying to pluck up the courage to go and do it. My partner doesn't know how I feel either. In the past when I have been down he just told me to stop being a drama queen and get on with things. So I would have to try and go without him knowing. Hes not one for speaking about his emotions!

 

[debecca]

sovereign, I've never thought you were daft and I really feel for you in the situation you're in now

I feel really awful too but find that getting out and about really helps - whether it's the fresh air or the fact I'm not cooped up all day with a screaming Flod, who knows? But it does seem to help.

Have you thought about making an appointment to go and see your GP to discuss things?

Hey hun thankyou for your reply. I have thought about going to speak with my GP, just trying to pluck up the courage to go and do it. My partner doesn't know how I feel either. In the past when I have been down he just told me to stop being a drama queen and get on with things. So I would have to try and go without him knowing. Hes not one for speaking about his emotions!

My husband just seems to think I'm tired and therefore if I sleep it will solve all my problems. Of course, I AM tired but I just lie awake with thoughts running round my brain and I'm anxious and I CAN'T sleep - so I am better off using 'down time' to get on with housework and so on.

At the weekend he offered to do the late night and middle of the night feeds for the first time in 7 weeks and he couldn't believe how difficult he found it. That's ONE NIGHT folks

 

[Sherlock]

Hey hun thankyou for your reply. I have thought about going to speak with my GP, just trying to pluck up the courage to go and do it. My partner doesn't know how I feel either. In the past when I have been down he just told me to stop being a drama queen and get on with things. So I would have to try and go without him knowing. Hes not one for speaking about his emotions!

PND is a real thing. You are not being a drama queen about this if you go see your GP and try to get some help for it. Getting help sooner rather than later is better. Its better your OH knows you have a genuine post pregnancy condition than not know and think everything is roses. Putting a brave face on it usually ends up causing more problems than anything as you end up resenting of others for it.

As debecca said getting out and about, even if its just for a walk and some fresh air can make a world of difference. I've been more or less house bound since my LO arrived and have found it really isolating and more or less gave up with people. But its not the way to go shutting myself off from the world and even though I am in one way crapping it about going out next week to the HV clinic, my HV has been great and is supporting me and just knowing she'll be there and will keep an eye on Galen while I keep making my trips to the loo is a real relief.

Its been a long time since you really were able to function properly as a woman and individual so its going to be hard to get back out there and face the world but by going to see your GP it will be the first step.

I really do feel for you and understand what you are going to, to some degree. Talking to someone will hopefully be a big relief and you will see you are not alone and don't have to just grin and bear it or hide yourself away at home.

Please keep us posted on how you are doing ok?

 

[Sherlock]

My husband just seems to think I'm tired and therefore if I sleep it will solve all my problems. Of course, I AM tired but I just lie awake with thoughts running round my brain and I'm anxious and I CAN'T sleep - so I am better off using 'down time' to get on with housework and so on.

At the weekend he offered to do the late night and middle of the night feeds for the first time in 7 weeks and he couldn't believe how difficult he found it. That's ONE NIGHT folks

Talk to him. Best thing I did was sitting down and telling Daniel what was really going on in my head. He actually knew things were far from perfect but had waited for me to reach the point I was ready to tell him than him try to get it out of me. Bless him if he didn't go and read up on PND and get himself armed with some facts and he even talked to my HV before I saw her so they could discuss what he could do to help etc.

Have to say I am really lucky as Daniel while not done a middle of the night feed has often stayed up with Galen on his sleepless nights and just held him or had him in the spare room so I could kip for a couple of hours between feeds. Now we are 6 weeks old almost he is starting to do more than the odd expressed feed and is doing the late night before bed feed and I am going to bed early and getting in some sleep. Well, as of tonight anyways. Our plan of attack on the PND! Sleep and a bit or moral support.

I can imagine your OH had a bit of a shock re the night feeds. Its blooming draining isn't it. Espcecially when they don't settle back down to sleep for 3 hours and then its time for the next feed

 

[Becky]

I didn't have PND but I defintely had a bad case of baby blues and at the time I felt awful because I should have been happy. My OH didn't understand it really but he is a great listener and sometimes just talking about it and acknowledging out loud to someone that you're feeling less than thrilled with your current situation can help.

The thing to remember is there are varying degrees of PND/baby blues and lots of different ways to tackle it. It isn't a bad thing to admit to but the first thing is to admit it then you can go forward from there.

 

[kellysomer]

I have found PND an incredibly hard thing to dicuss with DH, it is one thing to explain something that your understand to someone, but i dont even get it myself, so explaining it is nigh on impossible. It hard to explain how in one hand you can love your kids to the point you would sacrifice your own life and yet on the other side you feel so distanced and so emotionally drained. I feel like i run on empty and permanantly feel like i could fall alseep on the spot.

My HV was great luckily and got me on the councelling list (my PND is partly due to a traumatic birth) and i am going to a 10 week 'coping' course for PND sufferers. It doesnt always help, and sometimes i feel worse after a session but its good to know that others feel the same as me and that i am not a bad mum. I have made a friend from it and we go out once a week and chat, she understands me and i understand her.

My main problem is that i feel like a bad mum to the kids, i cant play with them both and running the house takes up all my time. I cry when i think that Morgan gets no attention and i cry when i cant do all the housework. I cant win. I am scared stiff of going back to work part time, my kids wont know me.

If anyone wants to PM me for a chat or share their worries then do, its good to know we're not alone. I know i've got PND and thats a start, but its a mountain to climb and i'm stood at basecamp.....

 

[Teej]

Decided not to take the medication after all, when i read up on side effects i found there was a good chance i would feel even worse than i do now, and thats not good!
Its amazing the support out there once you are able to just talk to someone about how you are feeling, my GP and HV have been brilliant and i've been referred to a local support group who are contacting me today. Even though it took my OH making the GP appointment for me behind my back it now feels alot better just having admitted am not doing so well. Anyone who's struggling, please talk to your GP it really can help.
(And thanks Sherlock for your reply)