First pregnancy, first miscarriage.

[KWalker1]

Two weeks ago I found out I was pregnant. The feeling was indescribable. Exactly a week later I woke up and saw blood and rushed to A&E. I spent the day in hospital being poked and prodded and was told my hormone levels were low since then I’ve been back every day 2 days for a blood test, my last one being yesterday. My levels in that time went from 147, to 198 to 224 to 106. Yesterday I had cramps and bleeding and passed a few clots. I’m still bleeding today, just not as much and the pains aren’t as severe.

It all happened so fast and within to weeks I’ve gone from being pregnant to not. I lost by baby at 6!weeks and the aching I feel to have it back is heartbreaking. I fear if I get pregnant again, the same will happen.

I know this is stupid but does anyone else get jealous? My sister in law is 6 months in to pregnancy number two and has had no issues with either baby. So why me?

 

[WheelDon2]

Honey, it's hard to ask why you. But remember, it is NOT your fault.

I've been there. I had a chemical pregnancy at 5w3d in March. It was so hard, the roller coaster of emotions that I felt and I'm sure you are feeling now. It's okay to have those feelings. We are here to talk things through with you.

The green bug of jealous raged hard once I found out I had lost my bean. I had friends announcing their pregnancies and to me it was just so unfair. They drank and even smoked super early into their pregnancy and still have their baby growing while I tried to do everything so perfectly and still lost it.

Don't get discouraged, there are many women (including myself) who will be here to support you and give you advice. Keep your head up and keep trying love!

 

[Akua]

Oh I definitely get what you mean by being jealous. Every now and then the green eyed monster hits hard. I’ve been invited to a party in a few weeks where everyone else is bringing their children. Except me. Because I have none. Maybe I’ll bring the dog instead.

It does get easier though. Sorry you’re going through this

 

[Kholl]

I am so, so sorry. I’m on the tail end of my first miscarriage myself and I cannot freaking believe how devastating it’s been. I’ve been steamrolled by grief. It’s stirred up feelings so deep and issues I thought I’d resolved decades ago. It’s been agony. I am so sorry. I can’t believe this is an everyday occurrence for women everywhere... it’s just debilitating.

 

[Lea89]

Firstly I'm so sorry for your loss nothing at the time can comfort you.

But I just wanted to give you a positive outlook on your sad news.

It is so common for women to loose their first pregnancies, sadly 40%. I was one of those 40%, I too lost mine at just over 6 weeks, never even developed a heartbeat the Dr advised me there was a problem with either egg or sperm and that 85% of women who miscarry their first go on to have healthy babies soon after.

I fell pregnant the next month and that was 3 years ago! All was fine.

I know it's so hard right now, I remember just laying in bed calling in sick at work for like 3 days. You'll never forget this little one, and I find talking openly about it really helps, but I really hope you'll be able to eventually move on from this and soon have a bfp that sticks. Xx

 

[Jamie.d]

so sorry for your loss

I've lost 7 in total...I have mostly blocked them out (as terrible as that sounds) because they are just indescribably painful...

I remember the one I lost right as my friend was pregnant, we would have almost been due date buddies! And I loathed her..
It is normal, I love her to bits really but it always seems like they don't know how lucky they are even though that isn't really the case x
sending lots of hugs, you are stronger than you know x

 

[KWalker1]

I’ve stopped bleeding now and am considering trying again already. I miss being pregnant and I want our little one running around!

Would it be too soon? And I’m so worried about loosing it again

 

[Akua]

Definitely not too soon. Some studies even show it’s more likely to be a successful pregnancy if you fall again in the next six months

 

[Kholl]

We are NTNP again immediately. I’m also terrified beyond words of another loss but we can’t make ourselves not want another baby so there’s no other option in our minds. There is zero evidence that there is any risk to trying again immediately. I think they want you to wait a cycle to easier date the pregnancy and to “let hormones regulate” but if hormones aren’t “regulated” you won’t get pregnant in the first place so no need to wait for arbitrary reasons or doctor convenience.

 

[KWalker1]

How long does the bleeding last for?

I’m still bleeding and it’s been a week of what I would call miscarriage bleeding but 2 weeks since the inital sign of bleeding that originally sent me to A&E