Finally had enough!!!!!

[Sunnyb]

Well I have decided to call it a day to exclusively breastfeeding. Totally gutted, but have no more tears to cry or energy left. Holly has had colic for the last 2 weeks & last night screamed from 9pm til 4.50am. She won't take a dummy, but will take breast milk from a bottle. Problem is I'm too exhausted to express during the night & as it's down to me only to feed her, I'm just exhausted & nipples are sore & boobs feel bruised from her comfort sucking to help with the pain. Went to baby clinic to get her weighed & just burst into tears. HV says it might be better for me to formula feed her Aptamil comfort for colicky babies during the night (so my hubby or mum & dad could help at night) & continue to breast feed during the day. I think it's the only way forward for me & my families sanity. I still feel I'm letting Holly down & a failure (not that I'm saying mums that don't breast feed are failures, it's just my feelings towards Holly). Because I breast fed Joseph after such a traumatic birth, I just feel bad that I can't do the same for Holly this time around. But as HV said, family & personal circumstances are very different this time. Sorry for the moan, but just wanted to share my feelings with everyone & get it off my chest

Sunnyb xxx

 

[Maria1977]

It's so weird how we have this pressure on ourselves to breastfeed, I still have it now.

I can honestly and easily tell you that you have done amazing, given your daughter the best start and there is absolutely 100% nothing wrong with forumla feeding. I truly mean that, but I know that I would still beat myself up over the way you are.

It's crazy lol

But I mean it, you've done fab and your daughter has had the best start and there really is nothing wrong with formula feeding at all.

Hope the colic stops soon and you all feel better once you're all sleeping better xxxx

 

[Esoames]

you've done an amazing job! well done I've already said to my husband how on earth will i give baby no2 the same length of breastfeeding as i've given Isla when I have Isla to look after as well. You will probably find now you've accepted combination feeding you will feel better when feeding her, iykwim xxx

 

[AugustMum]

for getting to 4 weeks! BFing is very hard! I only have one baby and I managed a week so how youve done 4 weeks with your mini one and another LO is just beyond me.

Its fab that you're sticking to it though and just supplementing at night. Im sure youll find it so much more relaxing and start enjoying it again as you can get some more help. Hope this works out for you.

 

[karenandbump]

Don't beat urself up hon. WE put so much pressure on ourselves and u have given LO a great start!! Also u still plan to keep feeding in the day which is fab - best of both worlds. x x x

 

[ZMD]

You've done amazing to feed for this long Hun! nothing wrong with combination feeding hope hollys Colic clears up soon xx

 

[Sunnyb]

Thanks ladies. I've been very emotional today & have kept bursting into tears over it. I had a major wobble in Babiesrus buying formula & bottles, but have resigned myself to the fact that it's best for me & Holly & the rest of the family. This morning I shouted at Joseph for just being Joseph & just because I was so tired. I don't want this to be the norm, as I need to do the best for both my children & so my hang ups about formula feeding need to be overcome so that I can be a mum to both my gorgeous children. My hubby was saying because our personal circumstances are so different to when we had Joseph, it means we have to look at things differently. For example - if I'm knackered during the school holidays I can't go back to bed & certainly don't want to spend the days shouting at Joseph. I don't want Joseph to feel Holly is to blame for my bad moods & then resent her. Though I would love to continue to BF 24/7 I now know for me it's just not possible. I will probably continue to beat myself every time I give her a bottle for a while knowing I have perfectly functioning boobies to feed her from. But knowing my hubby or parents can help feed Holly & give me a bit of down time & have the enjoyment of feeding her too will help me feel a little better about it. Sorry to whinge again & seem so melodramatic, but it just feels like such a big deal to me x

Sunnyb xxx

 

[frankie707]

Dont worry yourself - you're not even giving up on bf, adding formula at night is a small change and once she starts going through the night you might find your back to exclusive bf anyway. Dont beat yourself up about it a lot of bf mums I know do a bottle of formula in the evening times so dads can help and they can have a small break.

 

[Minchin]

yeah totally agree with what frankie said. Don;t beat yourself up, it's only adding a bit of formula. hope the colic clears soon, sounds like a toughh time

xxx

 

[xxbeckyxx]

Well done for making a decision hun I still feel guilty about stopping at 6 months, damn these 'health professionals' for making it such a big deal!

 

[Elfs Mummy]

oh hun you have done a fantastic job hun and you've given Holly the best start you can and you're going to combo feed so she'll still be getting your breast milk xxxx

 

[Squeakz]

Agree with frankie!!!!!!!!! Even though your giving her formula overnight it really is the best of both!!!!!! Tou'll be able to relax over night and re-energise and its true what they say about happy mummy happy baby! And not only happy baby but happy joseph and OH as well!!!!!!!! You'll feel so much better about it once you get your head around it!! I know from what happened with josh!!!!!! XxX

 

[Miss]

Don't you dare feel guilty Sunnyb! you are fab! Well done for lasting this long hun but you have to do what is right for you! Healthy mummy = happy baby!

How is it going now you have made the change? Xxx

 

[JJ Mum]

Ahh well done you, and I know what you mean, i'm the same we put ourselves under soo much pressure to keep going, and beat ourselves up when we need to change, but your still feeding her, your just adding to her milk with formula, so great for her actually. Just think how much more human you will feel soon and rested and happy mums make far better parents for your kids. You may find you gain in other ways too with this change , perhaps Joesph can have a go at feeding his little sister too this way, I know mine fought over odd my expressed bottles in the early days before he refused a bottle.

Let us all know how fab you feel in a week or so hun X

 

[Sunnyb]

We've only done 2 nights & days of mixing BF & formula feeds, so not sure if it's coincidence, but Holly has slept around 3-4 hours between feeds & seemed much more settled. She has formula at 11pm & 3am (ish) & I BF her at 7am.
She is on Aptamil comfort for colicky babies & has Infacol before each feed & Colief added to her formula. On Friday night my hubby did all the night feeds & the 11pm one last night & then I did last nights shift. We both feel much different for having solid blocks of sleep & less stressed due to the decreased screaming. The only slight problem we have is that Holly is now constipated due to the formula. She's had some cool boiled water, but has cried due to this discomfort (though nowhere near as badly as the colic!)
Hopefully we'll get into some sort of routine now & Joseph can help with bottle feeding too eventually.
Thanks for everyone's comments & support, it's really appreciated x

Sunnyb xxx

 

[ZMD]

Pleased to hear its going well Hun xx

 

[Minchin]

Glad to hear it's going better and you've both had some sleep, will be nice for Joseph to do a feed! xxx

 

[Baby Bean]

Have only just seen this, I'm so pleased its going well. Please don't feel bad, ella was a comfort sucker so I.know how exhausting it is and I don't have another child to look after! I was just lucky that she took a dummy at 5 weeks or I would have probably had to do the sane as yoi. You are doing the right thing and as others have said it is the best of both worlds

 

[hopefulmummy]

Sunny, hugs xx. I just want to say re the colic. Have you thought about taking holly to a
Cranial osteopath? I've heard wonderful things of then helping babies with colic and I'm taking Arthur on Friday as they suggest it after an assisted delivery. A girl I
Know took her colicky baby and it cured him. Might be worth a try? Xxxx