Feeling unsure

[Lulabell]

Ive been beating myself up about something for a while now. Don't know what to do.

I've been breast feeding for almost 3 months now. But lately I've been tempted to go formula. When I think of why, I just end up feeling very bad and selfish.

It's starting to hurt me again. He messes around with my nipple and sometimes sucks so hard I feel like crying in pain. Sometimes I feel like I'm not producing enough. Another reason isi want to be able to do more during the day and not have to worry about finding a suitable place to feed. I feel bad hubby hasn't had many chances to feed him. I can't express at moment as every time he completely drains me.

On the other side, I love when he is latched on and behaving. It's a lovely feeling. I love knowing that I'm providing the best for him. It's also so nice when people say well done for feeding him myself.

I think if I did go formula, I'd feel like a failure. I have nothing against formula feeding by the way. Everyone does what is best for them. I guess I just have put so much pressure on myself to breast feed. I don't want to give up but sometimes I feel trapped and feel like I'm just a milk machine.

Sorry, pointless thread really. Just needed to write it down.

 

[prettypenguin]

Aww hun, I've ff from day 2 so I can't really offer much help but I do look back and wish id carried on, mine was different though I just felt sick at the thought of his mouth on my boobs, not cause I think bf is disgusting or anything, but its like how people don't like feet or spiders or the dark, I'm like, afraid of my own boobs and can't even look at them...weird I know(makes you wonder how i made a baby in the first place) but anyway why not speak to a midwife/hv/doctor see if they can help you out? And then once youre a bit better maybe express some of the time then daddy gets to feed sometimes and you still have that bond with Lo x

 

[Hemera]

Hey. Don't worry its not Just you. I'te been breastfeeding Drake for almost 6 months now and its really hard going being the only one who can feed him. I've often thought of formula but I know I would be disappointed in myself if I just gave up. EVeryone says its fine to stop bodies can really see the advantages of formula namely knowing how much he's taking but its all the pressure I've put on myself. Just try giving him one formula feed and see how you feel. You need to look after your own sainity and if switching to formula helps then do it. I tried it however and just felt guilty its silly the amount of pressure we put on ourselves.

 

[Hunnie]

You just have to do with what makes you happy LO will be no different being either formula fed or breast fed so it's your decision really as to what would make you happier as I think the key to a content baby is a happy mummy!

 

[My1stBaby]

aww i went through the same when i went from bf to ff i felt terribly guilty but i couldnt keep bf due to a bad cut so i just had to stop torturing myself and i realised whats best for mummy is best for baby

you could just a ff n see how you feel, you might be able to keep doing both??? xxx

 

[Lulabell]

Thank you ladies. I worry that if I try to do bf and ff then I'll end up losing my supply and having to goo ff full time. It really is messing with my head. Stupid really,I know. Just wish I could express as well as feed him so I could have the evening feed off and let hubby do it. Just don't seem to have the supply to do it though. xx

 

[TORino]

How about a support group to give some advice on expressing?? Or do you have any breastfeeding support staff at the hospital? They might be able to offer advice?

I toy with giving formula most days but then I think how proud of myself I am for even getting this far (and it's only just over 2 weeks for me).

You have done really well to do it for this long and given your LO the best start you can. So if you want to stop now you should take comfort in that.



Xx

 

[Hemera]

Try fenugreek and really carby food like oats. Also drink tones of water and pop the pump on after a feed and leave it on for 10-15 mins even if nothing is coming out. Should boost your supply. I tend to pump, then put baby on that boob as he can get more out than the spump can. Your supply should sick up but may take a dfew days.

 

[pinkyprincess]

How long have u felt like this? Everyone has off days, but if it is a while and it's getting you down then maybe you should.

HOWEVER as a bfer I would encourage you to try for a little longer to make sure it is what you want as once it's gone it's gone iykwim?

I can't see tickers to see how old your LO is? How often are you feeding? We're now feeding every 3 hours and i feel like that's given me a whole lease Of life as I worry less about fitting his feeds in to my day!

 

[Lulabell]

He will be 13 weeks on fri. Feeds every 3 hours(give or take) and sleeps between 7 and 10 hours at night. I've been feeling like this for a week or so.x

 

[pinkyprincess]

Wow! I've only just got to 3 hours this week and get 1-2hours at night!! Puts my devil child into perspective! I'll be having words with the stork lol!

Do you know why he's making you nipple hurt? How's his latch? Do you have thrush? That made my nipples hurt. Is he comfort sucking? I used to use lanisonah to lubricate.

Sorry if this is all stuff you've heard or thought of!!

 

[BevG]

aww well done for getting this far, i know exactly how you feel hun. im not getting the choice tho really as i have to return to college this week and have no more time to sort out breast feeding so im just offering her my boob throughout the day, giving her formula topups afterward. we have booby breakfast but shes really lazy about the other times now and generally wont drain me much, preferring to sleep than make the effort. if you want to give up thats your choice tho like pinky says be sure vefore you do it so you have no regrets. i wont regret it when my supply drys up after all the messing round, heartache and pain from thrush and bad latching i know i tried my best and gave her a good start and so have you. no matter what be proud of your achievement

 

[Lulabell]

I do feel very lucky with Joshua. I've heard bf babies don't tend to sleep through the night until later. Think he takes after his daddy though. DH loves his sleep! His latch is good when he is behaving. It's when he messes about, that's when it hurts. He pulls on it. That's what makes me think I'm not producing enough? Maybe he is frustrated? I tend to offer the other boob and 9 times out of 10 it does the trick. I alternate boobs during feeds but lately he has been having both each time.

 

[BevG]

growth spurt time?

 

[Lulabell]

Possibly. At 8 weeks he was 12lb 2.5oz. At 12 weeks he was 12lb 10oz. Didn't think that was much in 4 weeks? But he is just under 50th percentile. Maybe he is due a growth spurt. x

 

[pinkyprincess]

I was actually ready today if they are being fussy or falling asleep to swap sides and they soon learn not too. Maybe try it a week?

 

[Lulabell]

Yeh, I'll keep trying. Really don't want to give up. Always said id like to at least try for 6 months. I'm half way there, so can't give up now. Will try everyone's suggestions and see how it goes. Thank you everyone.xx

 

[pinkyprincess]

Good luck! Just remember if you're not happy/comfortable anymore there is another option

 

[muffinferon]

I have been bfeeding for 7weeks after a hard start (baby lost too much weight so wasn't giving him enough) but persevered, and I still go through periods where I feel like you do and it might be 'easier' just to go to formula, but then I also think how easy it is just to put Logan on boob and thats it. Thing is, ff isn't any easier as still have to go through the rigmarole of making bottles up and actually feeding but the one huge benefit it does have is you can share the feeding.

Only you can decide if you want to continue but if you do decide to ff, don't feel bad as you done great getting to 3 months and there is nothing to be ashamed of ff your baby.

Ideally I would like to bf for at least 3months but ideally I'd like to do it till 6 but I'm just taking it a week at a time. I enjoy feeding my boy I think I just miss sleep lol