Feeling a bit down at the moment - not sure if I'm doing something wrong?!

[hellywelly]

Does anyone else's LO seem constantly pissed off when they are awake?

I feel like a bit of a crap mummy at the moment. Evie is beautiful, and we don't have any of the awful problems some of you other mum's have had with reflux and lack of sleep, but I just feel like I don't know how to make her happy in the daytime. We probably only have about 30 mins every day when she's awake and generally content. The rest of the time she's either asleep or squawking.

We try playing with toys, reading stories, having tummy time and she seems to dislike it all!! It almost seems like she's a bit frustrated cause she wants to do more but realises she is too little to do it all. Sometimes I think she is upset cause she has wind and I understand that, but other times she is changed, fed, etc and still seems in a grump! She just seems to whinge a fair bit, and things that she used to like (like her swing chair) just make her scream now. She also seems very clingy, and I've had to resort to carrying her round in the Baby Bjorn to get things done.

I'm starting to feel the lack of contact with other people as I had a busy job constantly surrounded by people (primary school teacher) and now I'm home alone so much more. We go out nearly every day, either visiting or popping to the shops or the library just to get out and about and not feel so isolated. I'm hoping she isn't upset cause she's picking up on my vibes. I'm sure this is just me and her getting used to each other and adjusting to the new routine, but I just wanted to know if I'm the only one who feels like this, or do other people's LOs sit and gurgle to them happily for hours??

 

[pinkyprincess]

This is going to sound silly but does she get enough naps?

 

[BabyBrain]

Hun is she actually crying or grizzling? Albert's finding his voice now and several times I have gone flying into the lounge thinking he's in major pain and he's smiling away in his bouncer (I secretly think the little monster does it on purpose). At this age they are also practising their facial expressions and frown a lot, it's perfectly natural.

Being a new mum is the loneliest job on this earth especially when you are used to being very social. I feel the same, having crap family and friends not coming over is costing me a fortune cos all I am doing is shopping.

you are a fantastic mummy chick, even if E is now practising that "mummy you are a moron" look xxxxxxxxx

 

[hellywelly]

I am wondering about the quality of her sleep - she does get plenty of naps but sometimes it's when we are out walking so she is in the pram or baby carrier and I'm not sure it's quality sleep with her being jiggled around a bit!!

I'm also wondering if I'm mistaking her grizzling for her finding her voice. She does have all out temper tantrum moments but then she does just whine a bit and look unhappy without all out crying so maybe she is just practising saying stuff. I think the lack of smiling yet is also getting to me as I don't feel like I'm getting any reward for all the hard work!!! lol

I suffered a massive allergic reaction to a new body lotion I tried on Monday and am covered in red itchy hives that have been making it difficult to sleep and making me generally grumpy so I think may be she has picked up that mummy doesn't feel all that good this week. Despite all this I've just peered into her pram where she is sleeping and she is so gorgeous I could just eat her up!!

Thanks for the support ladies, it means a lot. xxx

 

[Mrs. KM]

Kallie has been cranky since she was about 6 weeks. I have determined that it is when she is tired, but she really fights sleep for daytime naps! I have to put her in my wrap and walk around and pat her bum and she cries until she falls asleep. As she is getting older the amount of happy awake time is getting longer so it is making things easier. Don't worry, you're not doing anything wrong! Some babies just want to be really close to mum, so if putting her on a carrier makes her happy, do it

 

[BevG]

Alyssa is a right whinger the last week since her jabs. we still get smiley times but wether its her teeth, reflux or her tummy it always seems as if something is making her miserable at the min and i cant decipher what it is exactly. so hard when shes screaming it makes me wanna cry (sometimes i do) but the rest of the time shes happy as can be. i secretly think that its me cos shes good for everyone else and will drink her bottle etc for them but not me, she just wants to be on my boob, its the only thing that soothes her at the min

 

[TORino]

I think it's pretty normal newborn behaviour hun. A lot of people I have spoken to have said the same.

We all doubt ourselves as its new to us too. I find it completely draining tbh. I don't get 5 mins peace really

We are palming her off to granny again tonight for a rest

 

[leannesxb]

hun AJ is permanantly miserable. I know he is in pain with the colic and reflux but I am lucky if I get a smile once a day. Just now he has screamed and fought with me so much my thumb just went crack and bent right back. Now I am in agony. Just my luck with the arthritis that it is broken or something. He had his calpol, feed, gripe water, clean bum and was swaddled but still he screamed for an hour solid! I am heartbroken that the experience I wanted and needed to have with this LO feels like it has been ruined. I feel like I will always resent him for the stress and pain he causes me and that I will never get through this. He never plays, has tummy time, goes in a bouncer or swing or has a bath without screaming at the top of his lungs. I am so miserable at the moment too hun. x

 

[hellywelly]

Big hugs to all us mummies I think at the moment. May be this is just what a lot of tiny babies do?? I think may be I'm just expecting too much too soon, and feeling frustrated as I'm used to teaching a class of 10 year olds who can tell me exactly what they want and need. I'm sad that quite a few of us are feeling a bit disollusioned with mummyhood at the moment but pleased I can vent on here and get such great support. I've tried to get things in perspective since this morning since watching the midday news. I live in Derby and drive past the house where 5 children died in a house fire overnight every time I visit the supermarket. Evie might be a pain in the ass sometimes but she's my beautiful little girl and she won't be a whingy baby forever. xxx

 

[benjis mum]

Joe was exactly the same. My friend said he'll get much happier at 8 weeks and he did, although he still. has very grumpy moments! We went to baby massage today and the other 12 week old babies were giggling and looked so happy whereas Joe just looked serious. It does get better! I teach reception children and they are all happy and full of life so our little grumpies must cheer up eventually!

Being a mummy is a huge shock to the system, especially if you're use to being busy and in control

 

[My1stBaby]

So sorry to hear you're not feeling good, your last comment will remind you how much you love her even when times are hard. Newborns are hardwork!they cry and cry and don't sleep and that has a big effect on us mummies. Some babies are perfect but at this age that's hard to come by. I've had a dreadful week with max I've been so miserable through lack of sleep but have asked for help and got it and am having such a better day. Don't feel like its you that's making her unhappy, its really normal! Just keep doing what you're doing and I'm sure you'll start getting the smiles soon. Your mood will have an affect on her yes, yesterday I was so miserable I didn't gget any smiles from max but daddy did- n that's coz I was in such a bad state.

Big hugs to you, I hope she cheers up soon don't ever feel like a bad mum xxxxx

 

[moragmac]

So Sorry you are feeling low...it's more common than you think. Not everyone feels full of love and joy initially, for some it takes time...and it doesn't mean you are a bad mum either. Have you tried telling your Health Visitor, it could be early postnatal depresion, or maybe she would have a few tips or contact details of local groups like baby massage which would help.

 

[Nurse 26]

being a mummy is much harder than i ever though and still very much a shock to the system, you are doing a fab job, harry can have days of being grumpy too, its a rollercoaster with so many up's and down's.

Hope you get some smiles soon, the do make it a little easier xx

 

[emmabeg]

Sending a hug your way, I have felt Freya is like that aswell, fine when she is sleeping but a wee grump when she is awake. She has been much better over the last few days though and has been happy to play on her wee mat or in her chair. Being a mum is hard work but as you say one look at their cute face and your heart melts. Hope u feel better soon. X

 

[Mrs N]

I think that at anitnatal classes they should say how much babies cry!! I was shocked when I had harrison and he is a really easy baby!! I found that once harrison started chatting he cried a lot less as sometimes they arent unhappy crying they just want to make themselves heard!! Your little one is very lucky to have a mummy who cares that much about them!! Try getting out and joining a baby group, I meet with my NCT mates every week and sometimes the babies cry but coz your with other mums you dont care!!
xxx

 

[Dustbunny]

Oh hunni I could have written the exact same post when Chloe was that age, I still could at times now

It's possible she isn't getting enough naps. I've found if Chloe wakes after 20 mins say she will be grumpy but if I put her straight back down she'll wake up in a far better mood.

Very likely too that she's just finding her voice, in which case sounds like she's going to be a right little chatter box which is so much fun when it comes to having conversations lol.

I found until recently that Chloe much preferred me pulling faces and singing than any of her toys and also observing out and about so maybe take her to the local park and get her out of the pram so she can see the world around her?

So so cliche but it really does get better

 

[hellywelly]

Thank you so much ladies for all your replies and support. E has slept lots more today and this evening I have been rewarded with 2 whole hours of awake interactive time with no crying! It has restored my faith in being a mummy. It is just fab to know that all this is relatively normal and I'm not the only one going through it. xxx

 

[jojo_2012]

L is similar, he sleeps a lot, not problems. We'll get a max 15 mins of pure happiness before he gets whingy. Although now those 15 minutes are coming much more frequently! It's the one baby trait I can say that both my babies have had in common!

 

[moragmac]

I have often thought as both a mum and health staff member, that reality is never part of what is preached....such as contractions are not painful, all mums can breast feed, and mums only wake to the sound of their own crying baby...you have to laugh...Personally I take the view that it is far better to know the truth...contractions are sore, breast feeding is like running a marathon in bare feet, and you get no sleep in hospital because of everyone else's crying baby !!...just my experience LOL x