confused about when he wants feeding?

[keelie_b]

im a bit confused. i seem to think that whenever Dylans crying, its because hes hungry so i just stick boob in his mouth and he never refuses so i think thats it. however, OH pointed out yesterday that he might not be hungry and soothed him to sleep for 30 mins with a dummy. but then i think well is the dummy just stalling his feed? and the same at night, as soon as he cries he gets fed and i wil admit its becausr i know its the quickest way to get him back to sleep
i know the checks, nappy temperature ect but i never think in the night that maybe he just wants a cuddle? should i try other things before feeding him? surely he'll start to learn that everu time he gets upset i feed him am i making things worse for myself?

loads of questions sorry. hope i made sense only have 2 mins before Dylan wants feeding - or does he?

 

[Lynsey]

I have to say, I do exactly the same as you! Unless he starts yawning while crying and then I know he is tired so i cuddle him to sleep instead of feeding.

Will be interesting to see what everyone says. I also did this for my first son and it didn't seem to create any bad habits.

 

[Grace'sMummy]

Hi
I do exactly the same!
I always end up feeding her back to sleep in the night but then I think that if she wasn't hungry she would refuse the boob and turn away but I know it's a big comfort thing too!
I too wonder if i'm creating a habit that'll be hard to break but I think that as they get older the whole sleeping and feeding thing gets easier?!! I hope so anyway!

 

[Tick-Tock]

I did this with Evie and when she was about 6 weeks old I made a point of waiting a few mins before getting out of bed and feeding and sometimes she just settled herself. This got a lot easier at 10 weeks when she went into her own room (sometimes the fact that her cries are a bit further away means I don't wake up sufficiently before she's back asleep).

I do try to pacify her with the dummy if she wakes up when she shouldn't be hungry and doesn't settle herself (I don't pick her up i just put the dummy in and go back to bed), if she isn't hungry she goes back to sleep. however if she is she will cry a few minutes later and then i know she wants feeding.

I was also given the tip of counting to 10 before feeding her during the day, because then it gives you time to look and see if she is showing signs she is hungry (rooting etc), which I did before I could predict when she actually was hungry.

I would also say don't beat yourself up about it... the fact that you care about instilling bad habits then the chances are when you notice that he is doing things you don't like (waking up every 1.5 hours for a feed at night in Evie's case) then you are likely to do something about it then rather than let it continue (It only takes 3 days to break a bad habit in a baby apparantly so if it starts to go wrong you only have to deal with the consequences for 3 days before it gets better).

One of my friends said to me when Evie was born, "welcome to parenthood, the world of guilt and doubt". I guess it's true!

J
XX

 

[LisaJ1986]

My baby's almost 10 months and i still do it! Maybe getting your OH to try and settle him first so he doesn't smell the milk My OH never did this. We had rough nights of wanting feeding so many times but she sleeps through now.
Angel is napping on me now coz in the day it's only possible with boob.

 

[uncle_bens]

My MIL tries to get me to put the boob to her wenever she cries but i try not to just incase shes not hungry and irritated by something else. I try for about 10 mins to see if its sumthing else, patting etc, when shes really sucking her hand i take it that shes hungry, otherwise she just wants a cuddle or a pat or to be burped.

If shes got gas i dont think it would help if i fed her again which is why i try that.

 

[poochielove]

I was doing this until i realised in the day he could go 4/5 hours without crying for boob yet 2 hours a time at night. Although that was the easiest way to get him to sleep i wanted to stop doing that as i know he can go 4/5 hours at night too and even once slept for 6hours! So i am now trying to just rock him back to sleep insted as i think he is just waking up and crying out of habit! I am going to try the pick up put down method tonight as was suggested to me earlier. In the day if he cries before 4 hours i try and distract him to drag it out and he now has big feeds every 4/5 hours rather than loads of half arsed ones every hour or so.

 

[heles7]

I got so worked about this in the early days with James. I had a lot people telling me that he shouldnt need feeding often and he should be working towards feeds every 4 hours. Well that didn't work well for us and we had a hard time getting him to put weight on after I realised that was not the right way to go about it. I gave him a dummy far too often and with hindsight, what I should have been doing was putting him on the boob. It's quite normal for breastfed babies to feed little and often and so I would be putting him to the boob as often as he wants.

Okay, it might be that Dylan wants comforting rather than feeding but thats fine too! I'm sure you won't make things worse for yourself. It was only after I began weaning James at 6 months that the HV said that James should be getting enough nutrition through the day that he doesnt require night feeds. I didn't give him a feed that night and he was fine and hasn't really had a night feed since.

You're doing brilliantly

 

[aramintalovegrove]

I also do this, its just natural I seem to do it without thinking but am trying to start controlling my urges as Im back to work in april and my childminder cant do the same for her

 

[glittergirl]

Yeah i do this too.

Last night (well, more like 4.00am) i tried the whole pick up put down method when he was stirring in his basket and thought i'm going to see if i can settle him without milk.

He went straight back to sleep BUT he he woke up 20 mins later SCREAMING. Only stopping once i had got his bottle. After that he was awake for over an hour where usually he drops straight off.

So it done me no favours not feeding him once he stirred I'm a very tired mammy today.

xxx