Birth certificate

[Jo91]

I'm now a single parent. If the father of my baby is on the birth certificate what rights does he have?

It's a long story but a brief outline is he socializes with people who do drugs (I don't know if he does them or not), drinks and is very aggressive and abusive. He has been in fights when he has been out clubbing before he started dating me, and he was in a violent relationship before me (he claims it was her but now it makes me wonder). He hasn't been violent to me though. He is going to be getting supervised access to see his baby because of this, but I was wondering what happens if he is on the birth certificate? My baby will be having my surname though.

 

[dollface79]

From what i think i know, he has more rights if on the certificate. If he decided to fight you in court for what ever reason he would have to take dna tests to prove she is his.

Personally i would put him on the certificate as he is her dad no matter what has happened.

 

[redbear]

A lot of what you mentioned was before you, which might not help if he says he is a changed man, I do know he would have more rights on the birth certificate but it will work both ways i.e him paying for her etc xx

 

[Jo91]

Thanks ladies my main concern is his friends who do drugs being around my baby and him drinking and being abusive to people when he is with her. He is on Police record too about a few things which I didn't even know about. I told my situation to my midwife and she has referred me on Monday to have a meeting with someone at my children's center.

 

[kinkers]

It depends on what you want from him really. He will have the same parental rights as you if he is named on the birth certificate, whereas if he wasn't, he wouldn't have any. As redbear said though it'll work both ways, so you won't be able to fight him for child support costs if he's not named.

 

[redbear]

Well im sure he will be set boundary's i.e supervised visits at first, not taking baby to his friends etc, and see how it goes, his druggy friends probably wont want to be around a baby anyway, its a big jump to not name him due to his friends and past. Some men change dramatically when they have children most advisors will say to give him a chance, if he blows that then fair enough you tried but I wouldn't jump straight to thinking about not putting his name on the certificate. But that's just my opinion xx

 

[redbear]

Is he an alcoholic? because I have 'druggie' friends and like a drink, but I don't take my kids with me if I go to there house (they smoke weed) and I will go out to the pub now and again to let my hair loose, before I had kids I got into a few fights (never police called though) but none of that is any way connected to my kids, I mean unless he is an alcoholic surely he wont be drinking when he has the baby.

I sound like such a bad mum now, I don't go out often and my friends from school are very successful druggies, own there house at 24, 12k car, own business works 70 hours a week and earn a fortune! Wouldn't want my kids breathing it in but its not something that bothers me personally. Don't do it myself but im not one to judge especially when there doing better in there life than me lol x

 

[Loula]

Its 50/50 with parental rights if hes on the certificate and he has to be there too.

 

[Jo91]

His drug friends have kids too, one of them has controlled access himself because of it and also because of the drinking. My ex-partner has been involved with the Police for drink-driving. He drinks about 5 beers on a work day so I don't know what is classed as an alcoholic but he drinks more than 5, could be up to 10 and probably more on days where he doesn't have work.

 

[redbear]

Yeh I do think there is a big difference because Alcoholics sometimes cant just stop drinking certain days, but im no expert, If his friend has controlled access already maybe that's a way you could go, but still have his name on the certificate. I think advice from proffecionals is needed xx

 

[Selina13]

If he is the father he should be on the birth certificate no matter what, he does have to be there though.
X

 

[katie_lou]

If he is the baby dad he should be on the birth certificate . X