Advice needed on hubby please....

[Tw1nkle]

Hiya,
Hubby and I have a beautiful baby girl, now 9 weeks old.

The problem is that my hubby has now gone back to work, full-time, and I think he is maybe starting to resent me being at home all day.

I may be wrong, but he's acting a bit weird, and has gone off helping with DD, when over Christmas he's been great and wanting to help out a lot.

I try to include him, but he acts like i'm asking too much of him - and that I should be doing everything - I'm happy too obviously, but don't want him to feel pushed out at all!

Any advice?

 

[Sandi4Paul]

have you tried talking to him about what he wants? My DH thought i had it esy until i got him to look after Logan for a day, he soon realised it can be tiring. Your OH may not realise what is involved and that could be why he is feeling resentful that you "have it easy".

Sandi

 

[mrs_tommo22]

Ditto - if thats the problem then you havw to leave your baby with him for a while while you go off and have fun!

He will soon have the general drift is isnt as easy as that.

My husband has only recently realised how hard it is too look after 2 children. And now no more silly comments off him!

 

[Tw1nkle]

I have tried to talk to him.

Take last night.....She was due for a feed at 7pm - he offered - i said great!
I was shattered so went to bed at 9pm - he presumed i'd take dd up with me, so i asked if he wanted to spend some time with her until he came up - which he did! I asked him to bring the next bottle up with him, and that i'd do the next feed. Instead he bought dd up some time later having done the feed - fine - until i realised that he hadn't added her medicine - and he didn't seem bothered!
So at 1am she's stirring for a feed, so i make up the bottle, she's not screaming but being a little vocal, and he wakes up and says 'i would ****** mind, but i've done the last two feeds'.!!!

Hopefully you can imagine how that made me feel at 1am this morning! I didn't say anything, just fed dd and went back to bed.



Sorry if TMI, but the atmosphere between is getting really bad, and i can't see a way out!
I would suggest that he has her for a day, by himself, but i know he'll invite his mom over if i do!

 

[MissThing]

Send them for a nice long walk.

It will give you some time alone, he wont be able to get MIL help-rescue and will hopefully bond them together more.

What I usually did when my son was younger (we live about 2 miles out of the town centre) I just send my DH with him to town centre to get something or just tell that my DH deserves a cup of coffee in a local coffee shop. That walk usually included 2 nappy changes (in the local shopping centre) and one feed. And it took them about 2-3 hours to go there and come back.


And with medcine thing... Well, its just a men thing. (Ill tell you a secret... No matter how good men are, they will never be as good as women with babies. My DH is absolutely brilliant, but still he can do things like putting shoes (how the hell he managed it I dont know ) on top of the socks, panty hose and a velour sleep suit! )
You just have to keep telling him in advance EXACTLY what to do.