10 weeks and partner being nasty

[Zara96]

Hi ladies,
I just need someone to talk to my boyfriend has been distant and not to interested in the fact we're having a baby his 31 and feel like he still hasnt grown up. He went missing last night for a few hours came back at 2.00am and this morning he was being nasty and said he dont care about me or the baby but in much worser words. He is nice one minute then next his nasty his own mother has even said she lives him cos his her son but hates him as a person. He has been nothing but stress for me at the moment and he doesn't help out or do anything to help me he dont even have a job he also drinks to. I feel like a single Parent. I am so so so so happy to become a mommy I'm over the moon and I am trying to give me and my baby the best I can I will love support and cherish my little one. I am worrying about alot of things if my baby is fine can't wait for my scan on the 10th june.
Sorry to moan about things. Just need some support and has anyone else felt like this?

 

[chattychar1990]

Wow he sounds like an asshole (sorry!)
I think you need to have a chat with him and see where he’s head is at and see where he sees he’s future. You may be best off without him if you both want different things x

 

[Zara96]

Wow he sounds like an asshole (sorry!)
I think you need to have a chat with him and see where he’s head is at and see where he sees he’s future. You may be best off without him if you both want different things x

He really is an asshole and to be honest with you I don't know why I am with him the more horrible he is to me the more I dislike him, he has threatend to take my baby away from me when the baby arrives and he has also threatens to shoot me in the stomach. I really don't like him anymore but scared incase he takes my baby I have even thought about not putting him on the birth certificate. I'm just lost at the moment but I know I don't want this man around me while he is still a child his 31 he has no job no car and no income he does sweet F**k all for me if I'm honest. I have sat down with him a spoke he says he will change but nothing happens or it last for a few days and his back to his horrible self. Thanks for getting back to me. X

 

[chattychar1990]

He really is an asshole and to be honest with you I don't know why I am with him the more horrible he is to me the more I dislike him, he has threatend to take my baby away from me when the baby arrives and he has also threatens to shoot me in the stomach. I really don't like him anymore but scared incase he takes my baby I have even thought about not putting him on the birth certificate. I'm just lost at the moment but I know I don't want this man around me while he is still a child his 31 he has no job no car and no income he does sweet F**k all for me if I'm honest. I have sat down with him a spoke he says he will change but nothing happens or it last for a few days and his back to his horrible self. Thanks for getting back to me. X

Wow you need to get rid of this guy. Please don’t be scared that he will take your baby away from you because that will never be allowed or it won’t ever happen.
You deserve more than that and you need to make sure you and your baby are safe x

 

[teachermummy]

This is an abusive partner. Leave.

 

[Zara96]

Wow you need to get rid of this guy. Please don’t be scared that he will take your baby away from you because that will never be allowed or it won’t ever happen.
You deserve more than that and you need to make sure you and your baby are safe x

That's what worries me more than anything that he will take the baby away when he or she's arrives. Yes I know all I want is a happy family but I will never have this with him I know I won't. X

 

[Zara96]

This is an abusive partner. Leave.

I will i am not happy anymore his not the same person. X

 

[Lollypop79]

That's what worries me more than anything that he will take the baby away when he or she's arrives. Yes I know all I want is a happy family but I will never have this with him I know I won't. X

He can’t take the baby away. I was in an abusive relationship with the father of my 2 kids. I stayed (stupidly) as I was that brainwashed by him. He used to threaten to take my kids all the time. Threaten to burn me alive in the house if I tried to leave him. I did and he didn’t do a thing. Abusive partners use fear and threats a lot to try control you. You obviously know what you need to do. I hope you leave him soon and if your worried speak to a solicitor. Some give an hours free advice. Citizens advice are rubbish so don’t try them. They didn’t help me at all. Speak to your family and friends. Good luck to you. Here if you need to come chat xx

 

[Amarie Brown]

He really is an asshole and to be honest with you I don't know why I am with him the more horrible he is to me the more I dislike him, he has threatend to take my baby away from me when the baby arrives and he has also threatens to shoot me in the stomach. I really don't like him anymore but scared incase he takes my baby I have even thought about not putting him on the birth certificate. I'm just lost at the moment but I know I don't want this man around me while he is still a child his 31 he has no job no car and no income he does sweet F**k all for me if I'm honest. I have sat down with him a spoke he says he will change but nothing happens or it last for a few days and his back to his horrible self. Thanks for getting back to me. X

you need to dump his bum ass you don't need that type of man around you or your child

 

[Kitana]

I'm sorry to hear this Zara. I really do hope you get out of this relationship, but be careful as I was in a manipulative relationship before and they always show their other face when you want to leave. Even when you will have left, they tend to find the perfect words to suck you back in. Don't fall into that trap because yes, he will show another him in the beginning but will still be the same person that you wanted to leave.
He seems quite childish and irresponsible. How come he's already 31 but got nowhere in life?!
You can perfectly do it by yourself. If your parents or friends can help out a bit in the beginning, you'll be able to manage all on your own.
Where do you live by the way?

 

[Zara96]

He can’t take the baby away. I was in an abusive relationship with the father of my 2 kids. I stayed (stupidly) as I was that brainwashed by him. He used to threaten to take my kids all the time. Threaten to burn me alive in the house if I tried to leave him. I did and he didn’t do a thing. Abusive partners use fear and threats a lot to try control you. You obviously know what you need to do. I hope you leave him soon and if your worried speak to a solicitor. Some give an hours free advice. Citizens advice are rubbish so don’t try them. They didn’t help me at all. Speak to your family and friends. Good luck to you. Here if you need to come chat xx

I do think that his all just words but the thought is still there in my head. I havw spoke to ny family they have told me to get away from him. Thank you so much. Xxx

 

[Zara96]

you need to dump his bum ass you don't need that type of man around you or your child

Yes I know that's exactly what he is a bum he has nothing and does nothing. Xx

 

[Zara96]

I'm sorry to hear this Zara. I really do hope you get out of this relationship, but be careful as I was in a manipulative relationship before and they always show their other face when you want to leave. Even when you will have left, they tend to find the perfect words to suck you back in. Don't fall into that trap because yes, he will show another him in the beginning but will still be the same person that you wanted to leave.
He seems quite childish and irresponsible. How come he's already 31 but got nowhere in life?!
You can perfectly do it by yourself. If your parents or friends can help out a bit in the beginning, you'll be able to manage all on your own.
Where do you live by the way?

Yes I used to be in an abusive relationship but this is just nearly the same without the physical side of it. Yes he is childish irresponsible and many more things. He is 31 and got no where in life because he thinks his to good and he hasn't grown up yet he doesn't want to make money the right way. Yes I know I can I have a lovely family and I work in a primary school and aiming to pass my practical driving test because I want something for myself by the time im.his age I'm only 23 xx thanks xx

 

[Sydney]

I don't want to be doom and gloom and scare you BUT... Please be careful with this man. I agree with what has been said, he's abusive.

I don't think his behaviour will change and it's likely to deteriorate and use his not-liking you/the situation as an excuse. I also say be careful because a woman's risk of being a victim of domestic violence and very serious incidents significantly increases in pregnancy and after giving birth.

Please make sure you think seriously about what you want and need to do for you and your baby. Make arrangements without him knowing and get out of there.

Take care.

 

[Zara96]

I don't want to be doom and gloom and scare you BUT... Please be careful with this man. I agree with what has been said, he's abusive.

I don't think his behaviour will change and it's likely to deteriorate and use his not-liking you/the situation as an excuse. I also say be careful because a woman's risk of being a victim of domestic violence and very serious incidents significantly increases in pregnancy and after giving birth.

Please make sure you think seriously about what you want and need to do for you and your baby. Make arrangements without him knowing and get out of there.

Take care.

Thank you so much for your help and support. I just feel like a single parent I have just been to the doctors he didn't come and the only reason he is coming to the scan is because he feels like he has to I am sure of it. I will keep u all updated. X thank you so much xx