Working mum, full time dad

[charliebeth]

It feels horrible.

A couple of weeks ago my hubby lost his job. The same day my boss asked me if I would be able to help him out and work a couple of weeks before my official return to work date. We need the money now so I said I would, it's only a few evenings, and eases me back to work next month.

But I feel terrible about leaving Jack. Even though he's with his dad and perfectly safe and happy. I'm scared of becoming an occasional parent. It sounds selfish but I'M his mum. I want to be the one who looks after him every day, and puts him to bed at night. I want him to want his mum when he's sad or hurt, not anyone else - even dad. If I'm not the one there to comfort him he'll stop wanting his mummy as much. I'm starting to feel like a spare part.

I understand now how some dads feel pushed out. I'm feeling it now.

 

[Becky]

I work full-time and have done since Lucy was 10 months old, partly out of need and partly because I like what I do. OH also works full time so its a bit different.

I have an amazing relationship with Lucy, she'll always be her daddy's girl and prefers him half the time (because he's soft on her!) but there are times when she just wants her mummy. I used to feel like you do but after a while I realised that no matter how amazing Lucy's relationship is with her dad/granny/grandad etc. there is something special about a relationship with a child and their mummy. Each relationship will give your child something different and will actually enrich your own relationship all the more.