Trying to conceive and it's getting me down :(

[tinselcat]

Hi Ann

It is hard and I think distancing yourself from it is an acceptable way of dealing with things. In the past week, facebook has (against my will) shown me pics of some stranger's 20-week scan, some other stranger's newborn and told me that my ex-husband (who defriended me) has just had a baby. I can't say how gutting some of this made me feel.

I've been ttc since Jan 2011 and in Jan 2012 decided that I would focus on things other than ttc, one being healthy living. In Jan I started eating healthily & lost 2kg, in Feb I started doing an exercise challenge (in my case that was to walk at least 4 km every day) and then later that month I got my bfp. Feb was the first month in a long while that I'd had any EWCM and I'm convinced the healthy living & exercise (and possibly evening primrose oil) had something to do with it. So if there's anything positive and proactive you could try doing for yourself I would recommend this.

Good luck with your husband's SA results xx

 

[Rae123]

hi allll im new to all this i have recently come off pill and am trying to concieve i didnt realise there was so much to know after reading all this info, nis there anything i shuld be doing i really am quite naive to all this i worked out when i should be ovulating and was just trying to do it around that time? xx

 

[netty]

naww hugs to you

its been over 3 years now for me i know how it feels, just gotta hang in there it will happen

dont beat yourself up, even with good sperm and good eggs your chances of conception are less than 20% each month!

its hard to make a baby

 

[cornishfairy]

I'm now on cycle 29.... Sooo frustrating! Two cycles ago we got our first bfp but lost it. It's given us hope that it is actually physically possible but don't think I can wait another 20-odd cycles for another one! X

 

[cocoflakes]

Hi there,
Iv never posted on one of these before but I'm really down at the moment and really feel like I need to talk to other people in a similar situation to me.
Me and my hubby have been ttc for ten months now and it's really beginning to get me down. Well ever since we started tryin and I got the dreaded AF that first month the whole thing has really got to me. Iv always wanted children and the thought of living my life without havin any scares the hell out of me. The past 2 years people around me have been gettin pregnant and although I'm really happy for them part of me can't help feeling resentful and wondering why it's not me. Iv just had tests to check I'm ovulating and that was fine, hubby's got a semen analysis I a few weeks too. I really don't feel like I can talk to any one as they all say it hasn't been long and I should enjoy being married and I no I should but I, and my hubby, want itso badly it's all we can focus on. I'm really scared of becoming a bitter horrible person that no one wants to be around but I feel that's what I'm turning into. Is any one out there in a similar position? If so, how r udealing with things as I need to change I can't go on like this xx

I totally understand, 10 months isnt that long to get worried but I know it will feel like you've been trying a lot longer and getting no where. We was only trying for 5-6 month and for the first few we wasnt looking to ovulation or anything like that, we was just having unprotected sex.
I'd wanted a baby for ages, everyone around me was posting photos of there scans and babies all over facebook and it can be abit depressiing although we wasn't trying i was broody but I used an ovulation calender last month and i'm finally pregnant so dont give up! Good luck!

 

[k8_005]

hi huni lots of people find it takes a long time, i have almost the opposite probelm i can fall pregnant fairly easily within 6 months of trying both times, but i cant seem to have a healthy one! I think some things are just worth the wait, I too see many freinds who fall pregnant and everything is fine and they are so unworried about it all being fine and dont seem scared at all, on the opposite side I have had one freind who has had 10 misscarriages previously in the first 6 weeks just have her 12 week scan and be told all is well and another whos baby is now 1 year old who when they concieved had been ttc for several years, another couple I know were told they would never have children as she couldnt get pregnant and lo and behold 3 months later she fell pregnant, (is now at 24 weeks) i think there are more people in your situation than you realise and those who arent wont understand at all,
I honestly believe te more you worry about it and obsess the harder it is to concieve and that it often happens at the least likely times or when you are most relaxed, there is nothing wrong with wanting it so badly its just sometimes takes a long time for it to be the right time, im a firm believer everything happens for a reason, maybe book some holidays or try and join a new group hobby wise so your mind isnt only focused on babies, its hard i know, and much easier to say than to do! we are ttc and i too wish things would be simple, funnily its not the conception bit that worrys me or the first 3 months its the scan and what will come next i panic about i keep wondering if i should even BE trying again am i just condoning us to more heartbreak? but im giving it another go because i truely believe if its meant to be it will be. so huni i believe you will get there and it will happen just give it time.x x x x

 

[k8_005]

hi allll im new to all this i have recently come off pill and am trying to concieve i didnt realise there was so much to know after reading all this info, nis there anything i shuld be doing i really am quite naive to all this i worked out when i should be ovulating and was just trying to do it around that time? xx

yeh thats the basics but its always good to stock up on vitamins too there are some brilliant pregnacare pre conception ones available. xx

 

[mummywanabe]

I read your post and felt as if I'd written it myself, my hubby and I have also been ttc For 10 months, my friends have also recently had babies in the last 2 years, I feel so disappointed everytime I test now or af comes, I sometimes feel like I'm letting my husband down although he tells me bot to worry, I'm 30 this year and I really want to start my family, I find it ironic thatvin our younger years we try not to get pregnant and now we want babies its just not happening,

 

[seraphim]

i think its the not knowing and the fear factor of what if it doesnt happen.
Now weve been ttc for as long as we have (i already have children) and ive gone through the excitement,hoping,worry anxiety fear upset (still get that way btw) for me at least it is the will it happen what if it doesnt thing that gets to me.

getting how you feel out somewhere and knowing there are others going through the same and you arent alone and not the only one feeling like you are ,for me,that helped me a lot.

the other thing that could help is definitive tests which show whether there are actually any biological reasons (besides OH low sperm count and hes working on that quitting smoking) that are getting in the way.

depending on your age your gp will be able to either advise you,offer simple tests for you both blood for you to check hormone levels at certain times of the monthmseen analysis for OH.

if you are 36 or over,your gp should be inclined to get the ball rolling faster than they would do if you are under 36.

But that may not apply if you have any pre existing medical issues that may affect fertility for you and OH.

 

[andy777]

hey there
i know how you feel, i have been trying for 2 years now to conceive, had the test to see wetha i am ovualting, came back positive. dont know what else to do now