Thinking of having another baby!!!???

[lulu]

Hi, some of you guys know me from before, I chatted quite a bit whilst I was pregnant for Jack and a little while afterwards. Sorry I have not been on for a while, working and day to day life kinda takes over.

Anyway, my partner was saying he would like to have another baby now Jack is older (20mths). I would like to, but Im not sure if it's the right time and how I will cope.

The factors I am thinking of are:

1. Work, how I would fit it in with 2 little ones and the financial cost etc
2. my weight? I have lost 2 stone but would like to loose another 2.
3 health - I have been suffering with depression again and off work at moment ( this was the case when I fell pregnant for Jack though aswell)
4. How would I cope with 2
5. Is Jack still a little too young, should I leave it longer.

I know its a long post but any info/advice from you guys would be great.

All I see on the telly recently is pregnant women, and babies - even on Cbeebies!!!

 

[Urchin]

Hiya welcome back

I'm gonna move this to the "Ask a mum" section as it's baby related, hope thats OK.

 

[Sherry]

Hi
Well Sebastian is 7 weeks old now and I would like another. We arent using any form of contraception we have just decided if it happens, it happens. I dont want to leave such a big gap anyway like I have got with my first which is 7 years.
My brother and I have only 11 months between us and are very close. I would like it the same way with the next one so I dont think 20 months is such a short gap. I know it can be hard having 2 young ones but its what we want to do and I have great support from Alec. I think if Seb had been a difficult baby as Josh was then I wouldnt be thinking of another just yet.
If you dont think it is the right time then you should talk it throgh more with your partner.

 

[kellie80]

My 2 have just under 14 months between them and its great. Hard work but really rewarding. If hes 20 months already thats sounds like it'll be a great age gap.

 

[kelsey]

Hi there, there is 17 months between my 1st and 2nd 3 1/2 years between my 2nd and 3rd. Now the 3rd is nearly 11 months and I'm 21 weeks pregnant with the 4th. Personally I like the small age gaps. I would say it can be hard at times when you've got a newborn with another child close in age but with a routine I found it a lot easier. Also as they are getting older (they're 4 1/2 and nearly 6) they're very close and are great company for each other.

As for the depression, if you can recognise the signs you can always talk to your health visitor if you're feeling low. I was suffering pnd after the last one and as soon as I found out I was pregnant I went to see my health visitor (who I'd been talking things through with).

If you want another child you can always lose the weight again afterwards.

I cant answer about the job as 1) my full time job at the mo is looking after the children and 2) I don't know what job you do and how flexible they are etc.

Hope some of this is helpful.

 

[lulu]

Hi, thanks for your answers so far.

I work part time as Case administrator for the probation service and I know that you can work flexi time if you have young children.
I would like to stay at work but financially, I would probably have too!

I have posted another topic about nursery.

There is so much to think about!!!

 

[lulu]

I guess another thing is how tax credits would change and hoew much child benefit you would get.

Any help on this would be great! Thanks

 

[emma28]

Hiya,
I would have loved to have concieved about then. Now Jonah will be almost 4 before this baby's born and I think it is a bit of a difference. On the plus side, he'll be mostly at school by then.

Dh took a bit of persuading to have another but if yours is ready then that suggests he's gonna be a great help to you?

I would also say that most of us would like to be a bit thinner, richer before having babies, but it usually always works out alright.

Also it can take a while to concieve and then it takes another 9 months (hopefully) before you get your bundle...

I would say go for it...but that's what I would want, you have to do what seems right for you

I'm not much help- sorry

ooh and I think the family credit goes to about £130 month?

 

[breezee1984]

hubby and I want three children and we want them as close together in a ge as possible. I am 9 years younger then my brother and hes number 4 and im number 4, so you can imagine the age gap betweenme and the other 3 older ones!!! its not good to have too big an age gap, your younger ones will feel they dont fit in(BTW i was an accident..LOL ) good thing i have a little sis who is also my best friend

 

[lulu]

well I have had my coil taken out, we haven't actually confirmed we are TTC but we have had sex without contraception once or twice. Just wish I was more clued up on the TTC thing!

Thanks for all your answers by the way.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

Its up to you! sit down and work your finances out and see if you can afford to have tw babies in child care at once etc.theres a lot to consider, i know i couldnt do it myself.

If not the childcare could you afford to be a stay at home mum till there in scholl and put your career on hold - its a lot to think about.

 

[lulu]

At the moment Jack goes to his grandma if both me and my partner are working, sometimes thats not very often as my partner works shifts.

we are looking at moving to a cheaper house, but if we don't by the time I fall pregnant and go back after maternity leave, Jack is going to be 3/4 so he will be in nursery or pre school (don't you get so many sessions free)? but again my partner works shifts and I only work 3 days a week. The baby would then go to its grandma's instead of Jack.

We are lucky as all the family fight over having Jack!

That is the plan anyway