Telling people at 12 weeks but before scan?

[Log300]

Hi - looking for advice...

I live far from my family. I’m due to see lots of them in person over the bank holiday weekend, when I’ll be 11.5/11.6/12 weeks pregnant. I’m not due my nhs 12 week scan until I’m 12.2.

I’ve had no symptoms of miscarriage, am still morning sick, and due to a previous ectopic pregnancy I had a scan at 7.1 when everything looked fine, including a heartbeat.

I was planning to get a private “combined test” scan before the bank holiday weekend to tell people along with news that all was (hopefully!) well, but due to the complicated choices on offer (so many options and different names for the same tests!) difficulties ringing clinics when I’m at work (keeping it secret and they don’t respond to messages or emails), and for the combined test needing to be at least 11.2, but also needing time to get the blood results back to me, I think it’s basically going to be hard to do (and about £200!).

So is it worth me just getting a basic “is it still there?” Scan? (£60). Is it likely to give me much? How likely is it that I may have miscarried somewhere between 7 weeks and now but my body not realised? Is the important thing waiting until 12 weeks, or waiting until the 12 week scan?

Any advice much appreciated

 

[firsttimemum29]

Its a totally personal decision when you wait to tell people. My understanding is that people wait until 12 weeks or 12 week scan as there is a lower risk of miscarriage after 12 weeks. However we told family before 12 weeks, with our first it was similar situation, my family arent local and we were seeing them so wanted to tell them. With our second we told family early but for different reasons. Not sure when we will let family know about number 3! Its a personal decision. Hope that helps!

 

[Donna88]

We told a few people before the 12 week scan, for different reasons. It's a personal decision.

 

[Niknaknoo]

Totally depends on your relationship with them, my view is that I'll tell people that I would feel comfortable telling if anything was to go wrong.
Good luck whatever you decide.


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