should i give up?

[claireyfairey]

*sigh* I'm so confused

I've been expressing breast milk for Isla ever since we got home from the hospital, and I've been topping up with formula in the evenings.

I'm finding it's becoming a huge burden; I'm having to sterilise the pump constantly and my nipples are bleeding I'm actually dreading the times I have to pump, and am almost in tears because of the pain

I wanted to be able to breastfeed Isla so badly, so the pumping thing had been easing my guilt for the most part....and now I feel like giving that up...which I also feel guilty about!

I know exclusively bottle feeding is a completely okay thing to do. I just want to be sure it's the right thing. Am I just being lazy??? It's so hard to know what to do!

Help?

Claire xxx

 

[sparky]

firstly i know how hard it is to want to bf but cant.

i did the same with my isla expressed exclusivley for 4 weeks but it all became too much in the end all the hassel of bottlefeeding wityh none of the advantages!

what i will say is make a decision then move on, please dont beat yourself up

 

[NICCI]

do whats right for you hun!! dont feel guilty you have done a greatjob xxxxx

 

[kalia]

DD is nearly 24 weeks old. For 22 weeks I expressed all her meals and for the last couple of weeks I have expressed 5 out of 6 of the feeds. I do this because of an overly huge feeling of guilt. I don't really recommend it. Making up formula is a pain too - next baby I plan to breastfeed regardless!

Only you can chose whether you want to continue but I wanted to say that your nipples should not be bleeding! You shouldn't be in tears from the pain either. Are you using a manual or an electric pump? If it's electric I think there is far too much suction for you. The avent isis uno is adjustable and for the first couple of months I would set it to tiny amounts of suction and increase after a little while. Now I just stick it on full whack and leave it to it but that would have been agony to begin with! If it's a manual go far more slowly.

Was the nipple cracked before you started expressing? A crack could be being opened I suppose but expressing wouldn't cause one. It is probably worth a trip to your gp to make sure iy's ok. And use lansinoh.

 

[kalia]

Oh, you don't need to constantly sterilise the pump, you can put it in a sterile box in the fridge between expressing and clean it once a day. Look at the expressing sticky and use the search facility to find more good advice - I know I've written masses on the subject. I'd link to some threads but baby needs attention!

 

[Steelgoddess]

Hey sweetpea...

I really do think both bottle and breast have their pros and cons. I had to weigh this decision when trying to decide whether to really go for breastfeeding or not its like marmite some ppl love it and take to it like honey to a bee, others either decide not to do it or try and it just doesn't proceed.

I know there are lotions and potions that can help, i know vaseline kind of seals the soreness so its not as exposed if that makes sense...

I just want to say though that only YOU can make the decision to discontinue.

I wanted to be able to breastfeed Isla so badly, so the pumping thing had been easing my guilt for the most part....and now I feel like giving that up...which I also feel guilty about!

I felt like that too, however at the beginning I also knew if it didnt work out there were other options... You also must'nt feel guilty because you are trying to make a decision for the best here...
x

 

[Mildly]

I am so impressed you are getting enough boob milk for her during the day from expressing. I am so useless at it, I barely get any off when I try! Perhaps as your boobs are so sore maybe drop down to one bottle of EBM per day and feed her formula for the rest of the day. You may feel less sore in a couple of days and continue with more expressing if you feel you want to.

Just remember you need to make the best choice for you and Isla Whichever is going to make you happier, will make her happier too

 

[Sherlock]

Ditto what kalia said about the expressing. If you are doing it right it should not hurt nor should it make your nipples bleed. Sounds to me like the suction is too high, start on a low setting and build up over a a couple of weeks to the strongest setting.

I found it really painful the first few times I tried till I got the knack of positioning and so on. Often I had to move it off my boob and back on till I got it in the right place that meant my flow was good and also it wasn't painful. Once I had the hang of it I could get the right spot almost straight away each time and express away. If it was painful I just would reposition and try again.

A few other tips, give your boobs a good massage first and if you can do so in the shower in the morning before expressing. This will encourage your let down. Also worth trying to hand express a bit out first to make sure its flowing before attacthing to the pump. Then don't be afraid to move the pump on and off a few times till you find a place its comfy on. I often used to them gently massage my boob while expressing to get all the milk out.

And yes, lansinoh nipple cream is amazing.

I am not sure why you are not able to breastfeed direct but if expressing is your only option for breastmilk to your baby then do what you feel is right for you. If you may be able to breastfeed in the near future it may be worth persevering with expressing till your LO can go on the boob. If you can get the knack to positioning the pump and clear up the sore nipples (which should heal if you are pumping correctly) I'd say expressing is possible for some of the time but I'd not want to do it for all feeds. Its a lot of work.

Good luck.

 

[dannii87]

Hey hun, how are things today? Hope you're feeling a bit better about it all. I think you are doing an amazing job expressing for Isla! Well done babe.

All I will say, is make sure you are 100% about your decision before acting on it. A few times when I was BF I "decided" to give up and give her formula but at the last minute I'd change my mind. I realised I was acting on impulse and decided not to make any decisions until I'd REALLY thought it through.

Once your milk has dried up, you will NOT produce any milk until you give birth to another child. It is so so so important that you are fully prepared to let your milk dry up knowing you can't go back.

YOU need to sit through and have a think about it. Good luck hun! xx

 

[claireyfairey]

Hi Dannii Thanks for asking how I am!

Well, I only expressed once yesterday and I stopped because I was in a lot of pain. I think I got about 5oz but it was so painful. My nipples are all cracked and sore I use a manual Avent pump and I hate it. My whole boobs feel sore. I don't get engorged so much any more, so I'm pretty sure my supply has diminished quite a bit. I feel so poo, my boobs are total agony...I'm quite fed up with it.

My OH is trying to convince me to keep going, I think mostly because he knows I may feel upset about it in the future. I take his point but at this moment in time I feel pretty bad about having to express! I don't want to do it any more. I feel bad for saying that...but I can't see many positives in keeping going when it's just making me feel miserable.

Isla will be fine on her bottles. We're using Cow and Gate at the moment and don't seem to be having any problems so will keep going with that I think. I know she will be absolutely fine. I can see more positives in bottle feeding now - I will have more freedom (if I want it, I'm not planning on leaving her with anyone any time soon, I even hate going to the bathroom because it means I have to leave her for a few minutes!) and will be able to have a glass of wine if I fancy it!!! I'm exclusively feeding her at the moment so we still have that bond...daddy feeds her very occasionally but I won't let anyone else do it. That helps with the guilty feelings I think...

The main thing is that I am doing the right thing by Isla, and I think I am. I feel so anxious and stressed about expressing and I think I need to relax and let it go, and get on and enjoy my daughter.


Sorry that was long! Am trying to explain how I feel but I'm not doing a good job I think! I hope you're feeling better anyway Dannii How are you and Evie getting on with the bottles???

C xxx

 

[dannii87]

You sound happy with your decision babe, that's the main thing

We're doing well thanks! I'm a happier Mummy and she's a happier baby! For us, it's worked out for the best. I no longer dread feeds!

xx