Sex after baby

[Lynseysg]

Hi

It's ages since I've posted / been on here but I'm really hoping someone can help.

My little girl is now 8 months old, and sex is just becoming a problem. I had a c section with her so I didn't really think things would change but they have.

I feel embarrassed about it really and sad, I feel bad for my partner who is just so patient. It just hurts, because I'm so dry!!! And I bleed slightly, not lots but I'm assuming it's because I'm so dry.

I'm sorry if this isn't the right place to ask about this but any advice would be appreciated as I don't know what to do. This wasn't the issue before, has anyone else experienced this? Do I need to go to the drs or is this quite common??

Really appreciate any advice
Thank you
X

 

[Princess81]

I think it does take time to adjust Hun. It could be hormonal or your confidence maybe? Have you tried a lubricant to help you? Might be all you need to help with comfort x

 

[Lynseysg]

Think it is all I need probably as I'm just so dry it's uncomfortable, but I just feel embarrassed about it, and feel for my partner..... Which makes it worse, and I worry something is wrong with me, which adds to it so it just makes it a bigger problem.

I just don't know wt to do...... I'm not really prudish but because it's something that's never been a problem I don't know how to resolve it?!?
X

 

[cosmicgirl]

The problem with dryness is that once you have sex and it hurts, the next time you are anxious and that hinders arousal which in turn makes you dry, vicious circle.
Use some lubricants and take it easy. Be patient with it and once you're body gets itself back on track hormonally I'm sure things will be better xxx

 

[Lynseysg]

That's exactly it......it's a mind thing, but it's really upsetting me....... Ive no idea how or when u use lube which is embarrassing, but I think I need to investigate

 

[cosmicgirl]

Buy a tube of ky, use it on him during foreplay and get him to use some on you during foreplay too (it actually feels quite nice for you and him if you do it this way, also you kinda incorporate it into the act rather than stop proceedings to put some in iykwim.
Then when you are warmed up it will slide in easily and no dryness will be able to spoil your fun, once you've done it like this a few time, your anxiety will start to subside and you may find you regain a bit of your natural lubrication xxx

 

[Lynseysg]

Really appreciate your help thank you.... Is this where the bleeding is coming from do you think? Or is there something wrong, like I say it's not loads, and im assuming its because im so dry??
X

 

[Princess81]

It possibly is due to the dryness therefore causing irritation to your insides. I would do exactly as cosmic has advised you to do and see if it helps before you start to worry that something's wrong xx

 

[Lynseysg]

Thank you ladies, I'm really upset this morning and probably making more of it than necessary
X

 

[Princess81]

I don't think you are it's a personal matter and can be embarrassing for you both. I hope you manage to get it sorted x

 

[Lynseysg]

Luckily we can talk about things like this but it is embarrassing I find it difficult to deal with....... I just hope we sort it soon

Thanks again
Xx

 

[BevG]

why not get a small sampler of flavoured lubes from lovehoney.com and use them during foreplay to make it fun, i have bubblegum and cherry flavours, the watermelon is yukky tho. you could lube him up as a fun thing to do and use your imagination as to how to make it fun and relaxed
it takes the pressure off you using lube to help the problem and instead makes it a fun new thing to try, might take your mind off the issue altogether and if not its still lubricating so should do the job anyway.