Can I just barge in here ladies and say I do know how it feels but also know how it feels with a positive outcome?
Brief:. I have been with my OH a year before we decided to start trying and reason we did so quickly was due to it feeling right and the fact I had a cancer scare back in 2007 resulting in me loosing an ovary and fallopian tube on my right side, resulting in me not ovulating. I was very honest in beginning with my OH regarding this and told him it just might never happen, but thankfully he wanted to be with me baby or not.
So after numerous appointments with the infertility clinics and numerous pokes prods and tests it was confirmed my ovulation came back at 14.2, it needs to be above 30 to have a confirmed ovulation. And then my OH's sperm test came back as low with less than 5mil and mobility of 20%, we where devastated!
But, due to me having a son from a previous marriage, we as a couple are not allowed funded IVF and at 5k a shot, we couldnt afford to go private, but because my son lives with me full time im not allowed but if he was to live with his father id be allowed to have 3 shots of funded IVF, how is this fair? Also if my ex was to have trouble conceiving, despite never changing a nappy or making a bottle in his life, he would get it funded due to his son not living there with him full time....kind of a kick in the teeth huh?
Well after 14months of fighting we finally managed to get the infertility clinic to let us have Clomid
. But the month I was due to start it I ended up very ill in hospital on a drip for 4 days and was advised to not start clomid till the following month and as much as I was keen to get started I knew they where right.
So when I was finally better my girls took me for a one last piss up as they knew I had been given the drug so no alcohol etc. That night I was out and I bumped into a lass I knew of, not a friend just someone id say ho hows u etc in the street. Well this lass was 6months pregnant, was absolutely wasted drunk and openly admitting to having sex with 3 random men in the toilets already that night because pregnancy made her horny! She still to this day doesnt know who the father is to her son, there is a potential 3.
I went home that night and was disgusted. Why not me and my OH? We have a good home, financially stable, good jobs, all we wanted was a baby to complete our family.
Then a few weeks after this a friend of mine was getting trouble off his ex who was also pregnant, she was refusing him to have anything to do with the baby and I saw the txts to him saying she hopes the baby died cos she hated him so much. Again im sitting wondering why her and not us?
Now believe it or not, but this is when I discovered I was pregnant. I hadnt started clomid, my period never arrived for me to start it. After 16months of heartache tests and 4 chemical pregnancies we finally had our natural BFP, it happened for us, it was finally our time. Granted my little miss made up for the wait and gave me an awful pregnancy but still, we where getting our long awaited baby.
After she was born due to everything that happened we decided to not try not prevent sort of thing. Well Im happy to say my little girl is now 2 and im due this lil one in September (2months before my little girl turns3). And all happened naturally. Luckily the 2 times ive ovulated since 2007 are the times ive managed to conceive. ..my OH is now thinking he has super swimmers and feeling rather pleased with himself.
But, what im trying to say is your time will come girls. Im proof of that. It just takes us longer to get them for whatever reason, but a lady on here once told me the cutest babies take the longest to make and my goodness my LO is gorgeous..but then im biased lol.
Also, I know its difficult, I had to congratulate others through gritted teeth but even peoplw like myself who have tried and been through so much heartache who finally get their BFP, people still try bring you down. I currently have a friend who has 3 kids, shes 22 and has never had a problem conceiving. But she decided 3 months ago she wanted another and because it hasnt happened straight away shes now telling people she doesnt ovulate...and is finding it very hard to be happy for me, which puts me in an awkward position because I want to talk about my pregnancy, things I look forward to my plans etc but now feel I cant with her.
It will happen for you my lovlies. I promise. Xx
