Making a rod for my own back!

[Bloom]

Ive lost count of the amount of times friends and family have said that to me.

DD is going through that if i dont know you i dont want you looking or coming anywhere near me phase or i will scream.

Also she is becoming very demanding in that she wants to be carried everywhere. I cant get anything done even our bedtime rountine has gone out the window because she wont go to bed without crying because shes being put down. I dont know what to do i try leaving her to cry but she just wont give up she will go on for ages and i hate letting her get like that.

I do have a sling but im trying not to give in to her and carry all the time.

Any suggestions please

 

[LisaJ1986]

It must be a phase as we're exactly the same. My night's have only got easier as i'm giving her rice half hour before bed and she sends herself to sleep. She goes down for 9pm as we go to bed then anyway.
She refuses to look at people, she screams in my dad's face and i think it's quite upset him. He told me just to keep passing her over to people and she'll soon get used to it. But since she was born whenever she started crying they pass her straight back to me so i think she's picked up on this.
I just do things with her in the same room. Like i was cleaning the spare room today so i laid her on the bed as i was doing it.

 

[beanie]

I do have a sling but im trying not to give in to her and carry all the time.

Any suggestions please

that would be my suggestion . Why don't you want to use it?? If you are worried it'll make her very clingy then I wouldn't worry. When she is ready to sit by herself and play she will do but at the moment she just wants to be held by her mum. Baies suffer from seperation anxiety, at her age she has no idea that if you go you will come back, once you are out of sight you don't exist and she doesn't like it. The only other option is to leave her to cry - either way she will soo learn that it is ok for you to go, but one way is nicer then the other IMO.

I kow it can be frustrating but in a few months she will want to get down and have no time for cuddles, enjoy the snuggles whilst you can. Cally is now prefering to be on the floor rolling around and grabbing things she shouldn't have.

 

[helsekia]

i remember posting something similar a couple of weeks ago.I think its a 'that age' kind of thing.Cadens not been too bad the past 2 days,i tend to just go with the flow and do stuff when hes sleeping.as for bedtime well i tend to get him to sleep on my knee while im hugging him and then very carefully lay him on the settee and i wrap him up n leave him there til i go to bed,pick him up and take him with me.I know its not ideal bt it works right now and thats all im bothered about.I use his bumbo to take him into whichever room im in doing stuff,which helps a bit.

 

[Babylicious]

harrys the same, i carry him in his sling or sit him with me, not keen on leaving him to cry

 

[lisa&alex]

wear that baby

 

[BabyMagic]

I am no expert but I have read from somewhere that if you attend to your baby at this age they shouldn't cry as much when they are toddlers

Our babies are the same age, so clearly this is something for me to 'look forward' to (I love the forum it prepares you for all sorts). Only thing I have noticed LO do so far is that she goes to bed ok, but wakes up about 2 - 3 hours later and only settles after cuddles (not hungry). I was thinking this could have been down to teething though as well...

Good luck

 

[kalia]

DD isn't as bad as that but my opinion has always been that as baby's are viable from 24 weeks, she spent at least 18 weeks in me in a constant cuddle and if she wants constant cuddles for 18 weeks while adjusting to life outside then that's fine by me.

DD is handled most of the time, though she will lie down under her playgym that has toys that dangle low enough that she can reach. You can't buy ones like that as laws say the dangly bits can't be more than 15cm so I adapted one with ribbons so that the toys are within her reach and she can put them in her mouth and she loves it. She also went really well in my friends jumperoo as she could still see everything so I'm going to get one of them. Maybe if you find the right toy for her it will occupy her for 20 minutes or so a day to give you a little break.

Make sure she is still used to being around other people so that you don't end up in a situation where she will only ever be calm with you alone but don't fret too much.

For bedtime, I'd just cuddle her to sleep then put her in bed to be honest. Assuming if she wakes in the night she can settle herself I don't see a problem with this.

People telling you you're making a rod for your own back is useless and rude in my opinion. People saying (as my mum did to me) 'make sure she's used to being round other people because when you were little I was home alone with you almost all the time and so you wouldn't go to anyone else and I couldn't leave you for years which was not a good situation' is helpful and supportive. If people give you the rod lecture ask for their examples and experiences so that they can help you. If they don't have any give them a withering look, say 'so you're just being rude then with no idea what you're talking about?' and do what you think is best for you and your little girl.

 

[Bloom]

Glad im not the only one i think her teeth are moving around which doesnt help as she just wants her mummy or daddy.

 

[Lola's Mummy]

I'm no use cause i'd just put her in the sling