little flashes of cold feet?!

[trixipaws]

i know in my case its a bit uncertain whether or not we are actually ttc already- we're not officially yet but we're not being careful either- lol its a wierd one! anyway even tho i'm not "officially" ttc i would still be happy to get a bfp and i still think about ttc.

aaaanyway this is a new concept to me i have never planned a pregnancy before and this is what i find really quite odd!

i keep getting tiny, momentary flashes of panic!!! which is very unexpected because surely if u PLAN a baby then when it happens its coz u MADE it happen and WANTED it to, so why would u feel panicky???

they are very brief and fleeting, but a few times already this month (first month off pill, trying NFP as contraception but not familiar enough yet to put into practice- but still had unprotected sex a few times!) i think to myself "EEEP! what have i done?"

on the whole, i havent changed my mind and would be thrilled to get a bfp, but these little moments when i get doubts. and they are very puzzling!

does anyone else ever feel like this?

 

[babyblonde]

I think it's quite reasonable to have little pangs of concern every now and then hun - it's a big undertaking!!!!

 

[lea m]

I got them when I stopped my pill before I got pregnant with Lola-Mae! I think its natural!

 

[holly;]

i was like this before.

from around june we'd not been using anything.. so not TTC but not doing anything to stop it from happening. i was just trying to get together everything we needed to know etc. and decided just to have unprotected sex because we were going to TTC properly soon anyway!

for the first mont/two it got to AF and because i was getting used to my cycles i wasn't sure when AF should be here and i got quite panic-y thinking 'what've we done?' 'are we dong the right thing' etc. etc.

but i think it was partly to do with the fact i wasn't 100% sure that my OH was 100% on TTC. we'd had a scare and i'd decided actually, i want a baby and he sort of cam round to the idea. he never seemed as 'into' it as i did and i think when it came down to it i started panicing because i was worried about OH reaction more than 'do i really want this baby?' he has changed a hell of a lot lately though. i can now say 100% that we both want a baby as much as each other, i started drinking pink grapefruit juice, and taking my temps etc. and he's taken a real interest and remind me to take my temp and ask what it was. he's even asked if there is anything that he can do, or avoid etc. to help and to be honest i've never felt as positive and wanted a baby more than i do now, knowing fully well we both want this baby more than anything.

maybe because it's you're more in charge this time than before. before you were pregnant, no choice it just happened. this time you have a choice; you could use protection.. maybe it's the fact you have a choice this time that you're doubting it a bit.

i've read your posts and it's obvious what a fab mum you are already and how much you love your LO!
either way i think you're a fab mum and will be to any other LO you have, doubts or not.

 

[trixipaws]

awwww thanx holly what a lovely sweet post!

what u said did make me think, maybe its coz i dont think my boyf is as much into it as i am. the only thing he's said on the matter is we shall start next summer, but he is 100% aware of the risks he is taking and he's not stupid- so i can only assume at the very least he "doesnt mind" if i get pregnant, otherwise he would use condoms wouldnt he? maybe deep down i am worried about his reaction as he didnt react very well at first to the pregnancy last month (pretty much said the relationship was over unless i had a termination altho he came round the next day, once he'd got over the shock) i kno this time would have to be different because he's agreed to ttc (acutally it was HIS idea!!!) even if its not til summer, and also he knows iv come off pill and havent learned to chart yet so he cant be that bothered! but idk maybe deep down i am still worried

i especially liked the last bit u wrote made me smile like this

lea and babyblonde, thanku also for ur reassurance! x

 

[holly;]

awwww thanx holly what a lovely sweet post!

what u said did make me think, maybe its coz i dont think my boyf is as much into it as i am. the only thing he's said on the matter is we shall start next summer, but he is 100% aware of the risks he is taking and he's not stupid- so i can only assume at the very least he "doesnt mind" if i get pregnant, otherwise he would use condoms wouldnt he? maybe deep down i am worried about his reaction as he didnt react very well at first to the pregnancy last month (pretty much said the relationship was over unless i had a termination altho he came round the next day, once he'd got over the shock) i kno this time would have to be different because he's agreed to ttc (acutally it was HIS idea!!!) even if its not til summer, and also he knows iv come off pill and havent learned to chart yet so he cant be that bothered! but idk maybe deep down i am still worried

i especially liked the last bit u wrote made me smile like this

lea and babyblonde, thanku also for ur reassurance! x

that was my thoughts with my OH.

i've never been on the pill because of 'family' history etc. my cousin (who is 5days younger than me) was only able to go on the pill that stops AF completely, i'm unsure of the name, and as all the illnesses are on the side that we share i'd have to be put on the same pill and i didn't want it to mess up my chances of getting a BFP while my body tries to sort itself out.

so it was basically down to my OH, and not once after we decided we wanted a baby did he ever mention wanting to use a condom, so i knew he wanted a baby.. but wasn't into it as much as me so i still had my doubts.

and i'm glad your smiling enjoy yourself and your LO and take each day as it comes your OH knows the risks so can't complain should you get a BFP.

 

[lmrcpr]

I think its a good sign that you are worriing, i think if you didnt have any doubts it might mean you where rusinging into things.

 

[valentine]

Hi trixi,

I have spent the last 3 months in a state of panic and 'what have I done'! In all honesty, I think I have more worried feelings than excited or happy ones!

Part of it for me, is that I don't think I'm capable of creating something as perfect as my DD and we've had such a lovely happy start with her.

We were 'not trying, not preventing' either and bingo - ultimately I know I want babies close together so am delighted but am sh*t scared and feel totally cr*ppy so its hard sometimes to remember to be happy!

Good luck gorgeous, hope you get your Christmas BFP! Would you still go to Ibiza?

Valentine Xxx

 

[trixipaws]

lol i'd have to cancel ibiza if i fall this month coz i'd be 8 months pg so wouldnt be able to fly! i wouldnt mind tho. ibiza is my consolation prize if i get AF!